Juneteenth
Today’s a new day! Today is also Juneteenth. I want to share a few thoughts about this day and its significance in American history.
My journey to remembering and celebrating Juneteenth occurred later in life due to a lack of knowledge, as I was educated at a time where most school systems did not adequately teach on African American history and culture. (That’s why we can never return to those days). I believe the history of African Americans and their contributions to American society have often been overlooked or marginalized in traditional education systems. Learning about Juneteenth and understanding its significance can be a powerful awakening to the complexities of American history and the ongoing struggle for racial equality.
As I have learned more about Juneteenth, it serves as a reminder of both the injustices of the past and the resilience and perseverance of African Americans in the face of adversity. Juneteenth is not just a celebration of freedom from slavery but also a call to action for social justice and equality for all people. By remembering and celebrating Juneteenth, people of all races can honor the struggles and achievements of African Americans and work together towards a more just society. The journey of learning and growth is valuable not only for personal understanding but also for fostering greater empathy and solidarity across all communities.
It is never too late to learn and embrace aspects of history that may have been previously overlooked or omitted. Today, my call to action for you, for me, for communities across America is to be open to truly learning our history. All of our history. This will hopefully allow us to contribute to the broader effort of recognizing and honoring the diverse experiences and contributions of all individuals and communities.
Happy Juneteenth! ~OC
Men and Mental Health
Today, I am writing about a tough subject but one I believe is very important. As many of you know, my current health issues make it very difficult to share or write down my thoughts. I have actually been working on this piece for several months. I know it’s rather long, but I hope you will take the time to read it. Also, even though my health issues are of a physical nature, this health journey has been filled with moments of sadness and feeling a bit lost.
Today’s a new day! June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. I speak with so many men who feel the need to take care of everyone else, but tend to ignore the issues going on in their own lives. So men, today I want to share a little about taking care of yourself.
We have all heard the age-old saying, “Real men don’t cry.” As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey, I have tried very hard to take a stand against this toxic perspective because real men indeed cry, laugh, hurt, and heal. It’s about time that we stop being afraid to talk about men’s mental health, the different struggles we deal with and start speaking some truth. It’s time to get real.
So, why is it that men’s mental health is still stuck back in the 1950’s in so many ways?
In a world that often misunderstands and judges men for showing some emotions and having real conversations, it can be frightening to bare our souls, not for sympathy or attention, but for connection and understanding. I am often asked why I have chosen to be so open and transparent about my health battle? Well, simply– it is therapeutic for me, and I hope it offers a beacon of hope and understanding to someone out there, walking through their own struggles.
From a young age, the world dictates a playbook on “How to Be a Man,’ essentially promoting a culture where men feel the need to wear a mask, suppressing their true feelings and emotions.
But I believe it’s time to ditch that old playbook and rewrite a new one. A playbook that is open to real conversations. A playbook that encourages men to reach out to other men and discuss the tough issues that we have been taught to suppress. It’s time for real talk. It’s alright to feel, to break down, and to reach out.
I believe many men are concerned about being judged for sharing their feelings and being real. Sharing my experiences and being vulnerable hasn’t always been a walk in the park. In fact, at times it’s like walking a tightrope balancing between being open and the fear of being misunderstood or judged.
But, we must get past the fear of being judged so we can experience true healing. As I have shared my own story, not only have I experienced healing but have seen the power of healing touch other lives around me.
Yes, men’s mental health is indeed a real thing and let us not turn a deaf ear to this issue, but lend a listening one, a shoulder to lean on, and an encouraging word to someone walking through a tough season.
So, how do we rewrite the playbook on men’s mental health? It starts with you and me. It begins with acknowledging that mental health is not a sign of weakness, it is not a cry for attention, but a genuine call for help.
If you or someone you know is dealing with some mental health issues, I encourage you to reach out to a mental health professional. Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your strength and courage to fight back.
The road to unmasking and understanding men’s mental health is a journey filled with speed bumps, turns, and rocky roads. But I encourage you to embrace the journey with all its imperfections and challenges.
In conclusion, remember that it’s alright to stumble, to fall, but most importantly, to rise again, with a life filled with hope, passion, purpose and laughter. Never forget you matter, you belong and you’re loved. ~OC
Passion and Purpose
Today’s a new day! As men, our first question to another man usually is “What do you do for a living?” As men our careers tend to be our identities in so many ways. But what happens when that identity is taken away? Shattered into a million pieces when the doctors tell you that you have multiple life threatening illnesses that have no cure. Within hours of hearing that devastating news, what I did for a living didn’t matter anymore. But I still needed purpose. Something to distract me from all the test and multiple hospital stays. That’s why through prayer, I became a medical missionary/coach. Way back when my health journey first started, I was not qualified to help anyone walk through their medical journey. Still not sure I am. Only through God’s help and guidance, am I able to sit with people who are going through some of the toughest battles they have ever faced. I consider it an honor to help others navigate through their health journey. Through my own health challenges, I have found peace, joy and purpose.
As I talk with other patients, I always share the following: “It is not what happens to us during this season of struggles, but how we react that truly defines who we are.” So how do you want to be defined? Health issues or no health issues, that question should dictate how you live.
As I continue walking through this health journey, I am a big believer in being as honest and open as possible. Men are notoriously bad at sharing their feelings, but I want to change that narrative as I continue to live out this crazy beautiful health journey.
We get pushed along in this world by consumerism, but it really doesn’t matter what car, house or latest technology we have. No, what really matters in this journey called life is love, relationships, kindness, caring for others, being surrounded by family and friends. I want to create the best relationships I can, and live the happiest life I can, because I no longer know what my timeframe is (none of us do). So I will continue to live life with passion and purpose. ~OC
Embrace the Moments
Today’s a new day! Love those around you. Stay true to them. Take time with family and friends. Laugh together. Cry together. Celebrate together. Mourn together. Grow together. Cherish what you have right in front of you. Embrace it all. ~OC
Judgement Free Life
Today’s a new day! Take time to listen to other people. People that do not look like, worship like, speak like or vote like you. Ask questions that help you know more about them. Listen with compassion. Hold back from judgement and seek understanding. When you are done listening, listen some more. Wait on God for guidance on how to respond to challenging situations and people. Dare to live a judgement free life. ~OC
Let It Go!
Today’s a new day! The greatest threat to your future, is allowing the past to think it still has a place at the table. Let it go! ~OC
Beautiful Journey
Today’s a new day! As many of you know, I was diagnosed with young-onset dementia last September (2024). Life has changed in many ways since that diagnosis. Writing down my thoughts is much tougher these days. This post literally took me several weeks to write. Finding my words to write or speak can be a daunting challenge at times. As I navigate this new reality of living with dementia, I want to share the journey with you. To answer your questions and to share my thoughts for as long as I can. The following is a question I get a lot as I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey.
What gives you the strength to remain positive?
My Christian faith gives me deep meaning in life, giving me hope for the future and a perspective of my life being eternal, not simply limited to what I see and experience on this side of Heaven. This life and my health journey are temporary.
“So we do not lose heart. Though our self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18
I have met so many people with different health challenges during my journey, all at various stages of ability due to their declining health. But each person still remains an individual, with their true inner being shining through. The eyes remain a window into someone’s soul, and reflect our humanity.
As my thoughts and overall health becomes a bigger challenge, I see more clearly the importance of relationships. I also see and feel myself traveling through a wide range of emotions, even if they become a little more scrambled with the dementia. Our emotions connect us to each other, allowing us to form relationships, which is a mark of truly being human. As this journey takes me deeper within myself, I find myself reflecting more on God and how to truly live life more for Him. This is what gives me an abiding sense of meaning as I travel on this health journey wherever it takes me. Because I know the final destination is filled with peace and ultimate healing. As a Christian, the ending is really the beginning.
So as I continue to run this health race, I remain positive, feeling that I am gaining along this journey a far better sense of what it means to be truly alive and that much can be achieved to help others as I continue travel this crazy beautiful journey. ~OC
Take His Hand
Today’s a new day! When you feel overwhelmed by the storms of life and cannot see a way out, God sees through the darkest moments and will pull you out of the raging waters. Just let Him reach down and take your hand. God will never fail you. ~OC
Gratitude
Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings From OC.” This was written in 2022.~OC
When life is easy, gratitude is easy. But not in the storms. Not in the worried nights when anxiety is overwhelming us. Not in the hospital when pacing the floors hoping for good news. Gratitude hinges on our willingness to accept God’s will over our own. Accepting that He is in control, and we can trust Him.
In 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, we see God’s instruction to always be thankful: “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
In the storms of life, God is our only hope. His faithfulness and His goodness are present even during the darkest moments. It might not happen immediately, but thankfulness grows as we cling to Him. We are grateful not only for the joys of restored health, restored relationships and overcoming grief, but for the sorrows that brought us to a place of utter dependence on Jesus.
Today, before your day gets too busy with meetings and a to do list to get through, take some time to reflect on what God has done in your life. Offer gratitude not only for the “easy-sailing” blessings, but also for the lessons learned during the storms.
Dear God, thank You not only for Your countless blessings, but for the challenges that draw us near to You. For the lessons learned during the storm. Thank You for the hard moments when You gave us the strength to wait out the storm. You are so good. Whatever storms come into our lives, You are our Rock and our Shelter. Thank You for Your light that surrounds us, and Your love that never fails. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
The Blessed Overcomer 