Today’s a new day! Why does God allow us to walk through seasons of being in the wilderness? I have asked that question hundreds of times over the years. Especially when I have wrestled with fear and doubt. I have wondered how long would I have to walk through the wilderness and if I would actually make it out. The wilderness is not only a physical place, it illustrates a season of darkness and struggle. A time when life feels overwhelmingly heavy and everything looks dark.
For over two decades, I have walked through a season of health related issues. During this roller coaster ride, I have cried out to God on numerous occasions. Thankfully during the twist and turns of this journey, I have experienced being wrapped up in the strong and loving arms of God. Leaning into His promises. The past twenty-two years have not been easy. There have been some tough, lonely and dark moments. Yet as I have studied God’s word and experienced in my own journey, He meets us in the wilderness more than anywhere else in life. In the wilderness, we learn to depend on God, we sense his presence and we grow to love his word.
The children of Israel wandered in the wilderness for 40 years. Can you imagine? This time in the wilderness came after a great victory, as God parted the Red Sea so they could escape the pursuing Egyptian army that were chasing after them (Exodus 14). Yet even this stunning display of God’s awesome power wasn’t enough to maintain the Israelites loyalty and trust. No, they soon doubted God’s beautiful provision and complained. Can anyone relate? God then took the Israelites deep into the wilderness where he taught them about himself.
As the Israelites entered the wilderness, they had no way to provide for themselves. During this season they fondly recalled their days in Egypt, even though they were slaves and life was extremely hard. But life in Egypt was also predictable. Now as they walked through the wilderness, life was anything but predictable. Yet even in this season of uncertainty, God took care of the Israelites. When they were hungry and thirsty, God gave them manna to eat and brought water from a rock. (Exodus 16-17) They lacked nothing. Did you catch that?
During this crazy beautiful health journey, there have been days I could not provide for myself. During this season of challenges, God has always provided. When I was unable to drive, friends would take me to my appointments and treatments. Others would drop off meals, so Laura would not have to worry about cooking. God has blessed Laura and I with some amazing people during this season.
As the children of Israel walked through the wilderness, they not only depended on God for their physical needs, but they also needed him for direction. They had to keep their eyes on God because without his guidance, they didn’t know where they were going. God went before them, as a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night so that they would know when they had to leave and where they were supposed to go(Exodus 13:21-22). They were not given any instructions beforehand so they couldn’t make plans. The Israelites were forced to wait for God, only moving when he moved. During my health battle, I have chosen to only move when God tells me to move. My journey has been filled with many earthly unknowns, but God continues to guide my daily steps. I continue to keep my eyes on the promises of God.
One of the greatest gifts I have experienced during my wilderness experience is God’s presence. It is real and deeply intimate. I know He is with me. Every day I sense God’s love and comfort. In the wilderness, I feel God’s presence in ways that I can’t experience elsewhere. It is one of the elusive treasures of darkness. (Isaiah 45:3)
During their wilderness experience, God taught the Israelites to listen to his word. They learned that “man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.” (Deut 8:3). Through this wilderness journey, the Israelites learned that while manna was important, God’s word was essential. His words satisfied and sustained them in the desert in ways that food never could. In Jeremiah 15:16 we read, “Your words were found, and I ate them, and your words became to me a joy and the delight of my heart.”
God’s word is what has sustained me as I have walked through my health journey. I have learned to love God’s word in a deeper and more life changing way. God has spoken to me as I have studied the Bible, prayed and leaned into his promises. God’s word has provided me with direction, strength, comfort and peace during my toughest days.
This crazy beautiful health journey has definitely not been easy, but it has been priceless in so many ways. I have learned to trust God more and myself less. I have learned that God will always provide for my every need, though he often redefines what I need. I have learned to love God and his word more clearly.
So today, if you’re walking through your own wilderness experience do not give up. In this season, God can teach you his ways, provide for your needs and draw you closer to himself. I promise one day you will see how God used every minute in the wilderness to illustrate his glory and to maximize your eternal joy. Stay strong and keep thriving. ~OC