Tag: Friendship

True Friendship

Today’s a new day! A true friend is not the one who is there just during the good times, but is the one who decides to stay with you during the darkest storms.

The measure of true friendship isn’t found in shared moments of celebration and easy times, but in unwavering support during life’s toughest storms.

A true friend doesn’t desert you when challenges arise; instead, they stand by your side, offering comfort, strength, and unwavering support. Their presence is a steadfast anchor in turbulent waters, a source of solace and encouragement that helps you navigate life storms and emerge stronger on the other side.

This steadfastness, this unwavering commitment in the face of adversity, is the hallmark of a friendship that truly endures. ~OC

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2AM Thoughts

Today’s a new day! It’s 2am on this Tuesday morning. I have been unable to fall asleep. It’s just one of those crazy nights with Parkinson’s and Dementia. So I have walked around the house more times than I can remember. I have watched several YouTube videos to pass the time. Finally, I have decided to share my experience and thoughts with you. Writing is still something my brain allows me to do on occasion. Lately, God has filled my brain with many thoughts. I feel an urgency to write as much as possible before I can no longer do that. Tonight, my brain is extra active. That’s not always a good thing.

I have good days and bad days as I navigate through the multiple health issues that are slowly robbing me of so much. On a bad day, I cannot do anything at all. My energy levels are low and I feel fatigued. The only way I can describe it is that I feel like I have run a hundred marathons in a very short amount of time. I feel totally drained.

But I have lots of coping strategies. I choose to use those days to pray a lot more. I choose to reach out to friends even though I know, I will not hear back from the majority of them.

I think it’s important to have something that gives you a sense of purpose in life. I try to share my journey to help encourage others walking through their own life struggles. If I can help just one other person, that’s enough for me.

When most people think about neurological issues, especially dementia they think it’s all about memory loss. But I have cognitive issues also- trying to figure things out can be difficult and frustrating. Also too many voices at one time can be overwhelming. I get frustrated and anxious if I am struggling to follow the conversation. I also deal with a lot of rigidity and pain, which creates so many issues.

Over the years I have lost many friends as I have walked through this crazy beautiful health journey. I believe a lot of people have a difficult time talking to and relating to me. But I am still me. My story has just changed a little. A lot of times when Laura and I are around other people, they will address questions to her, not me. My prayer is that people would see the person, not the disease.

But I am blessed that a few friends have decided to stick around and not jump ship. I hold those friendships very close to my heart.

I choose to embrace each moment of life. I try to share my love and thoughts now. Not waiting for the perfect moment. Because the perfect moment is today. Laura and I do not wait for the perfect moment to buy that gift or take that trip. Now is the perfect time. Now is the perfect time to take care of future arrangements. Which we have done. I did not want Laura dealing with all of that on her own.

It also means we’ve had really indepth chats about what quality of life really looks like. Everyone has to figure that out for themselves and their loved ones.

Life looks different every day. What I could do yesterday, might be more difficult to accomplish today. I continue to live my life with my cup overflowing. I try not to beat myself up too much when I cannot do something anymore. Because there are still many things I can do. So today, I choose to embrace the now and what I can accomplish today. ~OC

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My Life With Dementia

Today’s a new day! As I continue to walk through this crazy beautiful health journey, I have always wanted to be upfront and honest when sharing my journey with you. So this morning, I want to share a post I have been working on for several weeks. It’s my life with dementia. I apologize in advance for the long post.

When I was diagnosed with young onset dementia last year, part of me thought there has to be a mistake, but it was also a relief to have some answers on why my life seemed a little out of focus. But it was still hard to hear “you have dementia.” Like so many people diagnosed with young-onset dementia, I was still planning a future with my bride. How was dementia showing up in my 50’s?

But here I am, almost a year later.

What I have learned is a dementia diagnosis isn’t the end of life. It just means life looks a little different.

Of course my life has looked a little different for the last twenty-three years dealing with multiple health issues. But over the last two decades, my faith and life experiences have taught me it’s possible to live a fulfilling, purposeful, and even joyful life even while dealing with the uncertainty of declining health. A diagnosis of dementia was not going to change that. At least I hope and pray that will be the case.

So as I walk out this journey called dementia, I wanted to share a few things that are working for me. This is not a neat how to live with dementia list, because dementia is not an easy follow these instructions and everything will be okay disease. No, dementia is a unpredictable roller coaster ride. Every day brings new challenges, but also new opportunities.

My hope and prayer is that this blog post will help create conversations. If you’re living with dementia, or supporting someone who is, I hope these tools help you live a full life regardless of the diagnosis.

My Dementia Toolbox:

I choose to live each day with Hope and Purpose.

I choose to live a life full of new adventures. Never stop making memories with family and friends.

I choose to maintain my independence as long as possible.

I choose to continue connecting with family and friends.

I choose to adapt to the changes dementia brings and never give up.

I choose to hold onto my identity and what makes me “me.”

I choose to keep learning new things each day.

I choose to live out my life and faith.

I choose not to avoid the declines that dementia brings, but to make the most out of every day and refuse to let dementia silence me.

Finally, living with dementia is not an easy journey. There are moments of loss and frustration, but there are also unexpected discoveries, laughs, and the good will of family and friends. ~OC

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Potholes in Life

Today’s a new day! Last night after my doctor’s appointment, Laura and I drove around town a bit. There is so much construction going on around us. Also a lot of potholes and roadblocks to navigate around. At times, I felt like I was on some type of ride at the fair.

On our journey through life, we also face many bumps and potholes along the way. There are financial, relational, and medical trials that will come into our lives. What we do when we come to a bump in the road is usually slow down or come to a complete stop in order to better assess the situation before moving forward. We must also keep a certain balance ourselves, so as not to falter or fall down. There are times when Christian friends will come alongside us and help us to navigate these bumps in our lives. At times, if we become stalled for a long time, they might gently urge us and encourage us to move on and continue on the road of life.

“Those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service, not status.” ~Romans 15:1

As we were driving around town, it was only Laura and I paying close attention to the road construction around us, that saved us from hitting one pothole after another. It also helped that we knew some of the potholes were coming, so we were able to avoid them. Knowing the road allowed us the grace to prepare ourselves for the bumpy ride.

But what about the times when we don’t know what lies ahead of us on this journey called life or what’s around the next corner? In those times, we need to turn directly to Jesus. He knows the road ahead, and we can always depend on Him to guide us safely through those bumps in the journey.

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” ~Deuteronomy 31:8

Prayer for the Day: Dear God, help us to turn to You first when we face the bumps and potholes in our journey. We know that You are more than capable of helping meet our needs. Dear God, help our unbelief in times of trouble. Make us a people able to stand strong as we or a loved one walks through the bumpy moments in life. We pray all of this in your powerful and matchless name dear Jesus. Amen.

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Bearers of the Mat

Today’s a new day!

“And when he returned to Capernaum after some days, it was reported that he was at a home. And many were gathered together, so that there was no more room, not even at the door. And he was preaching the word to them. And they came, bringing to him a paralytic carried by four men. And when they could not get near him because of the crowd, they removed the roof above him, and when they had made an opening, they let down the bed on which the paralytic lay.” ~Mark 2:1-4

I have always loved this story. It truly demonstrates the love of friends and our need for solid friendships. The four men in Mark 2, went beyond normal friendship and became “Bearers of the Mat.”

These four friends saw their friend needed a miracle in his life. They heard Jesus was in the area, so they decided to pick up their friend’s mat and get him to the Great Physician. We have no idea how far these four men had to walk carrying their friend, just to get to Jesus. No doubt they were exhausted by the time they reached the door of the house where Jesus was. There they found a new obstacle. The house where Jesus was speaking was beyond packed. But these four men persevered. Their friend needed a miracle and they were determined to get him to Jesus. Even if it meant carrying their friend to the roof and cutting a hole into the roof, so they could lower their friend into the room where Jesus was speaking. Can you imagine what a sight that must have been? What an amazing moment it must have been when after all that hard work, these four friends watched in awe as their friend was completely healed by Jesus. What a day of celebration that must have been.

Every time I read the story in Mark 2, two questions come to mind:

1). Do I have friends like these four men?

2). Am I a friend like these four men?

I pray we will all take the time to check our hearts as we reflect on these two questions. I truly believe Jesus wants each of us to serve one another willingly and wholeheartedly. Let’s become “Bearers of the Mat” ~OC

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Prayers For A New School Year

Today’s a new day! A new school year starts for many today. I want to pray for this new school year. ~OC

Dear God, as a new school year starts, I want to pray for each of the students, teachers, administrators and school staff. May they each experience patience, wisdom, and a school year filled with hope. God, I pray this school year is filled with amazing opportunities and blessings. I also pray this school year is filled with Your peace and safety. May this school year be filled with amazing success and memories. I pray all of this in Your powerful and matchless name. Amen.

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Truly Living

Today’s a new day! Are you just merely existing in this journey called life?

As I look around me, I see so many people who are just walking through the motions of everyday life, but they are not truly living life. They are not embracing it. For whatever ever reason they have stopped living before their hearts stopped beating. 

As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey for the past twenty-three years, I have learned that living a meaningful life has nothing to do with how much money you have in the bank or the materialistic things that you may possess. To truly live has nothing to do with your status in life.

To truly live life is to appreciate everything that you are. To live your life being aware of all your shortcomings but still loving yourself. To understand that those imperfections are part of who you are. To realize that you do not need to change anything about yourself to just impress others. Make changes because they make you a better person. To understand that you are far from perfect but you are unique. There is only one of you walking on this earth. To truly live is to be happy with the person that God uniquely created…You.

To truly live life means to take that trip now, instead of waiting for the right time. The right time is now. A lot can happen in life between now and the right time. Choose to embrace adventure now.

To truly live life means to be in the present, to live in the moment and not waste your time dwelling on the past, or what could have been. To let go of what has happened and focus on what you can do right now to live a better life. To be a better person.

To truly live means to appreciate everything around you. To take time to watch the sunrise or sunset, listen to the birds singing, sit by the ocean or call up some friends to get together to just celebrate living.

To truly live life is to be okay expressing your feelings. To accept that sometimes we need to laugh, cry or scream. To allow yourself to grieve and heal.

To truly live life is to appreciate each moment. To find awesomeness and wander in every day life. To make the choice to get up every day and try to make the best of every day because you don’t know if you’ll be here tomorrow. To try and learn something from each of your life experiences.

To truly live life is to spend time with friends and loved ones. To surround yourself with those that encourage, challenge and inspire you to live your best life.

To truly live life is to find your purpose and live it out. To chase after your hopes and dreams and then go out and accomplish them. To never give up!

To truly live life is to be kind and respectful to others. To buy breakfast for the person in line behind you. To reach out to family and friends to let them know how much they mean to you. To smile at a stranger. To take time to do one selfless act, big or small, on a regular basis. To truly live is to try to make a difference in your part of the world. 

To truly live life is to make the world a better place for the next generation. This one life is a beautiful gift. Embrace it! ~OC

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Men and Mental Health

Today, I am writing about a tough subject but one I believe is very important. As many of you know, my current health issues make it very difficult to share or write down my thoughts. I have actually been working on this piece for several months. I know it’s rather long, but I hope you will take the time to read it. Also, even though my health issues are of a physical nature, this health journey has been filled with moments of sadness and feeling a bit lost.

Today’s a new day! June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. I speak with so many men who feel the need to take care of everyone else, but tend to ignore the issues going on in their own lives. So men, today I want to share a little about taking care of yourself.

We have all heard the age-old saying, “Real men don’t cry.” As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey, I have tried very hard to take a stand against this toxic perspective because real men indeed cry, laugh, hurt, and heal. It’s about time that we stop being afraid to talk about men’s mental health, the different struggles we deal with and start speaking some truth. It’s time to get real.

So, why is it that men’s mental health is still stuck back in the 1950’s in so many ways?

In a world that often misunderstands and judges men for showing some emotions and having real conversations, it can be frightening to bare our souls, not for sympathy or attention, but for connection and understanding. I am often asked why I have chosen to be so open and transparent about my health battle? Well, simply– it is therapeutic for me, and I hope it offers a beacon of hope and understanding to someone out there, walking through their own struggles.

From a young age, the world dictates a playbook on “How to Be a Man,’ essentially promoting a culture where men feel the need to wear a mask, suppressing their true feelings and emotions.

But I believe it’s time to ditch that old playbook and rewrite a new one. A playbook that is open to real conversations. A playbook that encourages men to reach out to other men and discuss the tough issues that we have been taught to suppress. It’s time for real talk. It’s alright to feel, to break down, and to reach out.

I believe many men are concerned about being judged for sharing their feelings and being real. Sharing my experiences and being vulnerable hasn’t always been a walk in the park. In fact, at times it’s like walking a tightrope balancing between being open and the fear of being misunderstood or judged.

But, we must get past the fear of being judged so we can experience true healing. As I have shared my own story, not only have I experienced healing but have seen the power of healing touch other lives around me.

Yes, men’s mental health is indeed a real thing and let us not turn a deaf ear to this issue, but lend a listening one, a shoulder to lean on, and an encouraging word to someone walking through a tough season.

So, how do we rewrite the playbook on men’s mental health? It starts with you and me. It begins with acknowledging that mental health is not a sign of weakness, it is not a cry for attention, but a genuine call for help.

If you or someone you know is dealing with some mental health issues, I encourage you to reach out to a mental health professional. Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your strength and courage to fight back.

The road to unmasking and understanding men’s mental health is a journey filled with speed bumps, turns, and rocky roads. But I encourage you to embrace the journey with all its imperfections and challenges.

In conclusion, remember that it’s alright to stumble, to fall, but most importantly, to rise again, with a life filled with hope, passion, purpose and laughter. Never forget you matter, you belong and you’re loved. ~OC

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I Have Decided

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings from OC.” This was written in back in 2023. I am saddened that we are still talking about this in 2025. I pray you will take the time to read and reflect on the following words.

Christian Nationalists are busy attempting to build communities of delusion. Their false doctrine is pure fantasy and far from the love and common sense of Jesus and his teachings. Christian Nationalism is not true Christianity. I think it’s time for true Christians to stand up against this false theology and bring common sense back to the Christian community. It’s time to bring back the true teachings of Jesus.

It’s time for truth and love to stand up. A moment for the real Christian community to realize that Jesus has been forsaken by the false teachings of Christian Nationalism. To see how this false doctrine teaches power over people, the rich over the poor and nationalism over global freedom.

Think about the following words from Jesus, “For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’ “Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!” ~Matthew 25:35-40

Those truly serving Jesus will say “Yes and amen! We want to love and serve everyone.” Christian Nationalist will say “No, that’s woke. They need to take care of themselves.” You see, Christian Nationalism is a bad tree. Remember, Jesus said a bad tree cannot bear good fruit.

It’s time for a radical vision and movement, where everyone is welcomed to the table. A time to say no to division and evangelical extremism. It’s time for the real Christian community to be defined by the openness of Jesus and his love and reverence for all. Something you will not find in the Christian Nationalism movement.

I encourage everyone who truly loves Jesus and His teachings, to let your conscience be decisive.

For me, I have decided to follow Jesus, no turning back, no turning back. ~OC

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