Beautiful Journey

Today’s a new day! As many of you know, I was diagnosed with young-onset dementia last September (2024). Life has changed in many ways since that diagnosis. Writing down my thoughts is much tougher these days. This post literally took me several weeks to write. Finding my words to write or speak can be a daunting challenge at times. As I navigate this new reality of living with dementia, I want to share the journey with you. To answer your questions and to share my thoughts for as long as I can. The following is a question I get a lot as I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey.

What gives you the strength to remain positive?

My Christian faith gives me deep meaning in life, giving me hope for the future and a perspective of my life being eternal, not simply limited to what I see and experience on this side of Heaven. This life and my health journey are temporary.

“So we do not lose heart. Though our self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I have met so many people with different health challenges during my journey, all at various stages of ability due to their declining health. But each person still remains an individual, with their true inner being shining through. The eyes remain a window into someone’s soul, and reflect our humanity.

As my thoughts and overall health becomes a bigger challenge, I see more clearly the importance of relationships. I also see and feel myself traveling through a wide range of emotions, even if they become a little more scrambled with the dementia. Our emotions connect us to each other, allowing us to form relationships, which is a mark of truly being human. As this journey takes me deeper within myself, I find myself reflecting more on God and how to truly live life more for Him. This is what gives me an abiding sense of meaning as I travel on this health journey wherever it takes me. Because I know the final destination is filled with peace and ultimate healing. As a Christian, the ending is really the beginning.

So as I continue to run this health race, I remain positive, feeling that I am gaining along this journey a far better sense of what it means to be truly alive and that much can be achieved to help others as I continue travel this crazy beautiful journey. ~OC

A Night of Prayer

Hello. As I sit here at 10:00pm, I have this feeling God is calling me to a time of prayer tonight. That could be a few hours of prayer or it could mean a whole night of prayer. As I prepare my heart for whatever tonight holds, I want you to know I will be praying for you. If you happen to be up and need specific prayers, please feel free to reach out to me. I pray everyone has as a peaceful and restful night. God Bless. ~OC

Ending the day with God is just as important as when you begin. Another day is ending, and maybe you’re you looking for a way to give your dreams to God, forgive the wrongs of the day, or ask the Spirit to speak to you in your sleep. If you’re unsure what to say as you face another long night or a challenging tomorrow, you might like to pray along with these prayers and make Him the Lord of your nights.

From sunrise to sunset, let the Lord’s name be praised! Psalm 113:3

Thanks for Your Faithfulness

Heavenly Father, my day is drawing to an end, and I’m ready to turn in. But before I do, I have to thank you for your faithfulness today. It’s always a good day, even when things may not go the way I plan, or when the world seems in chaos, because you are in control.

Thanks for Your Unseen Presence

For all the times when I was aware of your help today, all the times when your unseen presence seemed so near, thank you, God. But for all the ways you worked behind the scenes, unknown to me, moments when heaven-sent angels moved on my behalf in ways I’ll never know, thank you for those also, Lord.

Thanks for Your Love and Forgiveness

Forgive me for any foolish actions on my part today or things I did without first asking your blessing or wisdom. Those are moments I would rather forget, but I am so grateful for your forgiveness when I ask. I never want to go to bed without clearing the air between us, Lord. Our friendship means too much, and your holiness deserves that. Thank you for loving me just as I an. Your love compels me to give you my all and fill my heart with praise for the relationship I share because of you sweet Jesus.

May Your Love Touch Others

As my family and friends close their eyes tonight, I am praying for each of them and praying they each would come to know You. I am praying that your love, like the countless number of stars in the night sky, will touch them and help them see who you truly are. I pray for our world and everyone in it. I pray for each of their needs to be met.

Grant Sleep, Refreshment, and Protection

Grant each with a good night’s sleep tonight, God, so that they can awake refreshed and ready to begin another day loving you. Thank you again for blessings so undeserved and too numerous to count. I long for the word “faithful” to describe our service to you, each day of every year. When I awake in the morning, may it be with a joyful smile, not a grumpy spirit. May your protection and your presence bathe my home with peace and safety against the enemy. Good night, Lord.

In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

Call to Community

Today’s a new day! As we scroll through social media or turn on the tv, there is no doubt we are living in messy times. Sadly, across America and the world so many people have become anxious and isolated. 

But, as I look at all of the craziness going on around us, all I can think about is how badly we need each other. We were not created to be divided. We have been called to appreciate and celebrate diversity. The inclusion of every culture, nation and people is an element in the reign of God, in the pictures we’re presented throughout the New Testament of the Bible, from the start of the book of Matthew to the end of Revelation. Even while much remains uncertain, the Spirit continues to summon us into the messy places of discomfort. We have been called to serve others, to help all know God’s love and peace.

We are living in messy times, but our hearts should be full of passion. A passion for stability and hope. A passion to know and see the value and worth of others around us. A passion to experience a sense of belonging and meaning. Only together, can we step forward into the mess of discomfort and build a community flourishing with the values of inclusion, hospitality, service, compassion, love and mercy. A community that is united and committed to looking past our differences and instead focusing on our commonalities.

If you have this same passion, then I welcome you to the call to community. Welcome to the mess of relationship, differences, variety and perspectives. Come on into this community where being the hands and feet of Jesus is not just another Christian cliche.

To build a community like this I need you. This community is created to welcome all people into the community as we explore the margins and celebrate the goodness. 

Welcome to the mess! Let’s go make a difference. ~OC

Running On Empty

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings From OC.” This was written in May 2023 during a hospital stay.

As I was reading and studying scripture this morning, the following came to my mind.

The Question of the Day: Do you find yourself at times, spiritually running on empty?”

Speaking for myself, I can say most definitely that there have been times when I was so focused on my spiritual destination and what I needed to do to get there that I allowed my spiritual gas tank to run dry.

Let’s take a moment to break that statement down:

– To begin with, there are a lot of “I’s” and “my’s” in that sentence – almost always a sure sign of trouble.

My focus was on “my spiritual destination” – not on God’s intentions for me in that moment.

My priorities were based on “what I needed to do” – not on God’s priorities for me.

– My spiritual gas tank was empty because I had neglected it; in my out-of-focus focus, I had left out the ONE who should have my utmost attention.

The Word of God gives us a beautiful comparison of two sisters with differing priorities.

Martha had invited Jesus into her home – an invitation that likely included Jesus’ twelve disciples. Luke writes, she “welcomed” Jesus. She was happy and excited to have Jesus in her home, she loved Him and wanted to serve Him well. But her focus quickly shifted from Jesus to the task of preparing the food and caring for her guests. Joyful service turned to resentment when Martha saw her sister, Mary, sitting at Jesus feet listening to Him talk.

Martha was running on “Empty” as she tried to guilt and manipulate Jesus into shaming Mary into helping her serve. Jesus kindly, but firmly, put Martha in her place. “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary.” (Luke 10:41-42)

Jesus told Martha that although she was stressed out over many things, she had missed the most important thing. Martha’s focus on the busyness of hosting and serving her guests had drained her spiritual tank and blurred her focus. She was operating on empty.

We can say and do foolish things when we are tired and running on empty.

– Martha’s efforts had depleted her spirit and left her empty.

– Martha’s joy had been replaced by irritation and frustration.

– Her sincere desire to serve had been replaced by feelings of resentment.

Then Jesus spoke words that convicted Martha deeply and likely changed her perspective forever, “Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” Jesus was saying that Mary had made the best choice – she had chosen Him. (Luke 10:42)

“The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot.” Psalm 16:5

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:26

“The LORD is my portion; I promise to keep Your words.” Psalm 119:57

Right now is a beautiful time of the year: a time to celebrate graduations, vacations and more time to hang out with family and friends. It’s also a time to run ourselves ragged – decorating, shopping, stressing about everything we need to get done before we can rest and enjoy the moment. If we are not careful, we will find ourselves running on EMPTY.

Not just Energy Empty…Spiritually Empty.

How can we keep our spiritual tank filled?

– Remember the focus is on God’s Love and His Ultimate Gift to Mankind (Don’t focus on yourself)

– Follow God in the moment (Don’t over plan and obsess on the details)

– Make God’s priorities yours (Don’t neglect your daily devotions and prayer time, keep first things first)

– Choose Jesus, He is your best choice – your perfect portion

The amazing thing is this, when we choose God as our focus, we will be filled, and we will stay full.

“And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.” (Philippians 1:9-11)

“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
‭‭(Ephesians‬ ‭3‬:‭14‬-‭21‬)

Finally, I encourage us all to spend more time enjoying the journey and less time stressing about the outcome. ~OC

What Might Jesus Say

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writing From OC.” This was written back in 2019.

For well over a decade, I’ve been journaling about and having discussions centered around seeking and living for Jesus in a noisy world. When I read my Bible, I have a journal close by to write down whatever God brings to my heart and mind. I take time to look at my life and examine how I am applying the passages I’m studying or how far away I am from doing so. It’s a way for me to allow God’s word to seep into my life in ways it hasn’t in the past.

This past week, I was reading in Luke 13:34 where It says, “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to it! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!”

Jesus spoke those words on Tuesday of Passion week, just three days before he was crucified. Jerusalem was not only a hotspot for the Jewish leadership that opposed Jesus, but it was also one of the homes of King Herod. Luke reported that Jesus said these words after some Pharisees warned him to leave because Herod wanted to kill Jesus.

In response, Jesus lamented that the people in Jerusalem had not welcomed him or allowed him to change their spiritual lives and eternal destination.

This got me start thinking. What might Jesus say to me?”

“Todd, how often I have longed to tell you your worth, but you looked to the world and not me.”

“Todd, how often I have longed to tell you that you could, but you listened to your own insecurities or the negative voices around you instead.”

“Todd, how often I have longed to show you the way out, but you were looking the wrong way.”

“Todd, how often I have longed to slap that phone or device out of your hand and tell you I am all you need.”

“Todd, how often I have wanted to speak to you, but your job or ministry work was more important.”

What about you? If Jesus was in front of you right now, what might he say to you? What would his lament sound like in your life?

Whatever that lament is—and I hope you take the time to think about it—you don’t have to stay stuck, and you don’t have to keep looking within yourself or to social media or to a self-help book for the answers to your questions or problems. You don’t have to keep fretting about the latest political news or worry that your friends on social media seem to have a better life than you.

Going to yourself or the world fills you with empty promises that things will get better and that you can look to yourself for change. Eventually those things come up woefully short. The peace you and I long for, the guidance we need, the encouragement to keep going is found not in us or the world but in the Word of God and in community with His people.

I believe life is much fuller when we take the Word of God seriously, examine it, and apply it. It’s about not just reading or listening to the Word only to walk away to the same habits that keep us in the same vicious cycle. No, when we do life with other mature Christians, they will remind us that God is in control and working in ways we cannot see. They will help us plant our faith so deeply in God that we are unshakable in the worst of storms.

Perhaps the greatest advantage to being in God’s Word is going back to Him after the world or our own insecurities beat us up to find God’s love isn’t fleeting. It’s easy to see our failures and the way things aren’t what we hoped. But God’s Word is like a constant cheerleader, reminding us we aren’t too damaged and haven’t wandered too far from His grace.

Jesus may lament that we get it wrong more often than we should, but only to make us stop long enough to get our attention off of us, away from the world, and back to him. Over and over his Word reminds us of our worth, our mission, and his love. We get to know the character of Jesus, and that’s when we know that after he cringes in lament, he’s sure to add encouragement like:

“I got that. You’re forgiven. Move on.”

“I know you’re trying, and I know it’s hard. Don’t give up.”

“They don’t understand, but I do.”

“I love that about you.”

“I saw that. It was amazing. Don’t ever stop doing that.”

Those are words I love to hear from God. How about you? ~OC

Keep It Close

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings From OC.” This was written back in 2021.

I want to encourage everyone, that whenever God does something amazing in your life (big or small) or a testimony takes place, to write it down because you will need it to look back on one day. When you’re drenched and soaked in a storm, it is so, so easy to forget about what God did yesterday. It is so easy to accuse God of being unloving, unjust, unfair, and everything else and forget how just a few weeks/months/years ago you were singing His praises and telling Him how wonderful He is.

All of us can look back on something that God has done in our past to encourage us in our present season. God has brought you through too many storms and tough seasons of life. So do not let the enemy fool you into thinking God has abandoned you all of the sudden. Remember, the enemy’s job is to deceive, kill and destroy. God is a fair, loving, compassionate and just God, who will never abandon or forsake us. ~OC

Why Do Christians Suffer?

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings From OC.” This was written in 2023.

During my crazy beautiful health journey, I have witnessed a lot of suffering. I have seen some friends that are pastors and missionaries suffer. I have seen some of them pass on and enter into Heaven. Maybe like me, you have asked yourself why do good people who are serving God suffer or experience great loss? Shouldn’t Christians be exempt from suffering?

As I have studied scriptures, I have found no evidence that Christians are to be excused from the storms of life, in fact we should expect them. James 1:2-4 tells us to “Count it all joy, my brothers and sisters, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

How can we be joyful when we get news that we are sick, a family member/friend is facing hard times or a loved one has died? Biblically, joy isn’t a happy clappy ‘oh life is great’ type of joy. It is a joy that comes from the Lord, knowing that no matter what the outcome is going to be the Lord is in control, that He is working out His plan, for His glory and that He is going to sustain us and help us through each bump in the road along the way.

Contrary to how we often view trials when we go through them, they actually cause us (or should cause us) to depend more on the Lord, by growing our faith and refining us. Just like nonbelievers, we will go through life’s challenges, but thankfully we have God to rely on for peace, hope and strength during these storms. Through all this, we can trust that the Lord is using it for His glory, even when we don’t understand why.

If you are currently facing a trial in life, I want to encourage you that God hasn’t left you to try and figure it all out on your own. He is not punishing you. No, God is right there with you in the middle of the twist and turns of the storm. And please do not allow anyone to tell you it’s your lack of faith or sin in your life.

In John 9:2-3 the disciples asked whose fault it was that the man was born blind. Jesus responds, “Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.” As is evident through this verse, God has a far greater purpose for things than our human and rational understanding can even comprehend.

As you walk through a season of trials, I want to encourage you, that God is working and there are many reasons He may be allowing this situation, but it will ultimately be for His glory and your good.

The Lord doesn’t promise all of us will be healed on earth

It frustrates me that we have so many people professing to be Christians and yet walk around telling people they are not healed because of their lack of faith. It isn’t your lack of faith that isn’t healing you. Maybe the Lord sees that you, or others, will be more sanctified and Him glorified through your trial. Look at Paul, a great apostle and man of faith, who was struck with an illness (Galatians 4:13-15).

Here Paul tells us that he had a physical condition, but why didn’t he just use his faith to heal himself? Well, the Lord used the illness to bring Himself glory and for Paul to be taken care of by the people of Galatia.

While people like to claim the verse in Isaiah 53:5 that by “Your stripes we are healed”, context is key and if you examine this verse it isn’t really talking about physical healing but rather God saving us from sin; the true ailment that kills us all and that He has saved us from that. We can find joy and hope and peace in knowing that one day the Lord will wipe away every tear, death and sickness will be gone, but until then we need to cling to our Lord and trust in His sovereign plan.

I know this was a long post, but I pray it brings some encouragement to those currently walking through a tough season in life. ~OC

Walking Through The Unknown

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings of OC.” This was written in 2018. I hope and pray it will bring you some encouragement. ~OC

Have you had moments in life, that you allowed fear to overwhelm you? Those moments where you just crawled under the covers because the fear had become too much for you to handle. I think we have all had moments of fear to some degree.

I remember when my health first started to fail me. Fear decided to pay me a little visit. Even though I do not remember it, my wife Laura shared I started giving some of my possessions away. The one thing I do remember about that period of time is, I opened my Bible and this familiar passage jumped off the pages:

Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” (Isaiah 43:1-2)

As I read each word slowly, God showed me something I’d never seen: My fears were like flames and my efforts to protect myself were like gasoline. Every attempt to ease my fears was like dousing fuel on the fire, and now it was consuming me.

Gently, the Holy Spirit reminded me of 2 Timothy 1:7: “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

Suddenly, I knew the only way to overcome my fear and walk in faith was to walk through what most of us fear the most. The Unknown. At that time and even today, I have no idea what my future holds health wise, but thankfully I know who holds my future in his hands. I am often reminded of this scripture: “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (Isaiah 41:10)

I had to make the decision to put fear away and walk through this health journey trusting God, realizing that even if my worst fears came true, He would still be with me.

Obviously, that doesn’t mean I no longer have moments of fear creep into my life. I am human after all. But in those moments, instead of letting fear overwhelm me I open my Bible and allow God’s words to flow over me. I lift my prayers up to God and asked for him to help me overcome whatever fear is trying to steal my peace. As I do these two things, I begin to feel that fear wash away.

In this long crazy beautiful health journey, I have learned that fear loses its power when we actively trust God more than what we fear.

Today, ask God to show you what you are afraid of. What is paralyzing your faith and keeping you from living confidently in His peace and freedom? And then make the choice to allow God to help you walk courageously through your fears, holding God’s hand and trusting His heart to lead, protect and preserve you each step of the way.

Dear God, help us walk through our fears by facing them instead of being paralyzed by them. We want to take Your hand and trust Your heart with all that is within us. Give us courage today to take the first step. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen

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