The Joy Robber

Today’s a new day! The Challenge for the day is: Stop comparing yourself to others.

Living a life of comparison is tiring and a big fat lie. When we look at someone else’s life, all we usually see is the surface. We usually do not see what is behind that amazing smile or what we consider a perfect life.

When we compare someone’s outside appearance with our current situation we do them and ourselves a disservice. Living a life of comparison is hurtful to everyone. I am convinced that comparison is one of the biggest joy-robbers and dream-destroyer in a person’s life.

The Joy Robber wedges its ugly self right in the middle of what God is calling us to do: write a book, apply for a new job, go on that mission trip or start a Bible study. Nothing will kill a dream faster than looking at the life of someone who’s already living your dream, then believing it’s too good for you.

When we compare ourselves to others we forget the value of our own lives. We forget that God created each of us in a unique and beautiful way. There is only one you.

If we truly want to live a life full of joy and purpose, we have to stop comparing ourselves to others. Life is not a competition. Life is so much better when we’re living out the gifts and talents God has given each of us. When we’re living out our purpose and not trying to be someone else.

So today, make the decision to start living out the life God created just for you and stop comparing yourself with someone else. Make it a great day! ~OC

Created for Community

Today’s a new day! God created us for community. Being part of a community allows us to love and support others walking through this journey called life. Being part of a community allows us to celebrate moments of triumphs and hold friends a little closer when heartaches hits those in our community. Being part of a community makes life a bit easier. But we cannot be part of a community if we do not seek one out.

Spoiler Alert! We cannot do life alone. Being surrounded by a supportive community is healthy in so many different ways. I have a small, but solid group of friends I can confide in when I struggle. A group of friends I can celebrate with during the good times. A group of friends that check in with me on a regular basis. There is great comfort being surrounded by community. Seek one out. ~OC

Sacrifice

Today’s a new day! In John 3:16, we read that God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. Think about that for a moment. What do you love so much that you would sacrifice your only child for? This question speaks to who we are and what we’re willing to sacrifice. I encourage everyone to spend some time reflecting on this question today. ~OC

I’m Blessed

Today’s a new day! This morning God led me to read Psalm 63. What a beautiful and encouraging chapter. I encourage each of you to take the time to read over this amazing chapter.

In Psalm 63, we read about God’s love and David’s response. It is filled with some amazing lessons. Here is one that God brought to my mind.

Have you ever said or heard someone make the statement, “I’m Blessed.” Most of us have uttered those words at least once in our lives. I do not use this phrase much, but it came to me as I was studying the scriptures this morning. So how would you describe being “blessed?” I’m glad you asked.

As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, I am blessed that God is present in my struggle. Knowing that I am not alone facing the uncertainties of this journey is a blessing. Feeling God’s love and kindness is a blessing. Living with the hope that my health issues are not the end of my story is a blessing.

Have you experienced God’s blessings in your own life? Think carefully. When have you felt alone, and a sudden thought or call reminded you of God’s presence? When have you been walking through a tough situation in your life and God reminded you that you’re not alone? When have you felt forgotten like nobody cares about you, and suddenly something happened that reminded you of God’s loving kindness? Each of those moments are blessings.

Remembering the ways that we have been blessed should give us a desire to give blessings. Remember in Psalm 63, we read that David chose a lifetime of singing God’s praises.

God’s blessings should transform us in such a way that they change our understanding of ourselves and of Him. Our lives should be filled with caring for others and passing on God’s blessings. Every time we take a breath, every time we speak and every time we serve.

So here is today’s challenge for each of us:

Take in a deep breath and give God praise. Allow him to remind you of all the ways he has blessed you in each area of your life. Carry those beautiful memories with you, as you go about your day and face the different challenges the day might bring. And take time to bless someone else today. ~OC

Right to Left

Today’s a new day! The Challenge for the Day:

Hurry kills presence.

Worry kills peace.

Doubt kills faith.

Ego kills love.

Now read that right to left.

Have a great day! Look for an opportunity encourage someone today. ~OC

Hope and Joy

Today’s a new day! The following post is one that I have been writing and rewriting for months. I am not sure it’s exactly everything I want to say, but sometimes you just have to put it out there and not worry about the response.

What if I shared with you that when I look at this crazy beautiful health journey I am on, I do so with hope and joy in my heart?

In the midst of countless hospital visits, treatments, pain and surgeries there has been indescribable hope and joy that has surrounded my every step.

Let me share some truth with you. It has not been my health journey that has that brought me this hope and joy. Far from it. The hope and joy that I live with comes from someone else. You see, as I have experienced my health declining over the years, I have become intimately aware of how fragile life really is. I have become more aware of how short, and how painful our time can be on this journey called life. This has led me to crave for a life that God promised to those who would follow Him. A life where there is no more pain, no more suffering, and no more death. 

As I have run this grueling health journey, I found myself more desperate for God’s word and the peace of heaven. There were days I fixed my eyes on heaven just to get through the day. But then something amazing began to happen. The more I focused on God’s promises and heaven, the more I felt alive and renewed. Even though my body continues to decline, I have experienced more hope in the promises found in the Bible than ever before. I started leaning more into those promises because that’s where I find my hope, peace and strength. I have to make a daily choice to totally embrace God’s promises or allow this health journey to consume me. To become my identity.

I began to see the scriptures in a whole new way. Verses like the following:

“My brothers and sisters, you will face all kinds of trouble. When you do, think of it as pure joy. Your faith will be tested. You know that when this happens it will produce in you the strength to continue. And you must allow this strength to finish its work. Then you will be all you should be. You will have everything you need.”~James 1:2-4

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” ~Romans 8:18

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I know as some of you read this post, you’re facing major storms in your life. Life seems overwhelming at times. So, when some guy is telling you to “think of it as pure joy”, it might bring out feelings of anger rather than joy. I get it. But just for a second asked yourself, “What if these verses are true?” What if even during the toughest moments of your journey, the cancer diagnosis, the Parkinson’s diagnosis or some other challenge is actually being used to make you perfect and complete, lacking in nothing? And that even the deepest hurt will someday be replaced with insurmountable love, peace, and joy.

The hope and joy I am writing about may not always look like happiness the way we understand it. The hope and joy that comes from following God and focusing on heaven is not the same as what the world defines as joy. I believe it’s far more rewarding.

The world connects joy to a moment, experience or circumstance. So, if life is currently full of sunshine, we have plenty of reasons to celebrate. But the amazing thing about God’s joy is that nothing in our life could be going right, but with God’s help, we can still find the strength within our soul to praise, to help others, and ultimately, still have hope and joy.

The darkest moments of my health journey are filled with hope and joy because I continue to cling to the beautiful promises of God. They are my lifeline. And as I continue to hold onto that hope, my head miraculously stays above the raging seas. The storms that surround me haven’t changed, but I know even the biggest battles in my life cannot take away my most precious gift in life, my relationship with God. And for that, I am forever grateful.

As I close out this post, I want you to hold onto the following truth: The hope and joy that comes from Heaven, far outweighs the trials we will face here on earth. ~OC

Truly Living

Today’s a new day! Are you just merely existing in this journey called life?

As I look around me, I see so many people who are just walking through the motions of everyday life, but they are not truly living life. They are not embracing it. For whatever ever reason they have stopped living before their hearts stopped beating. 

As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey for the past twenty-three years, I have learned that living a meaningful life has nothing to do with how much money you have in the bank or the materialistic things that you may possess. To truly live has nothing to do with your status in life.

To truly live life is to appreciate everything that you are. To live your life being aware of all your shortcomings but still loving yourself. To understand that those imperfections are part of who you are. To realize that you do not need to change anything about yourself to just impress others. Make changes because they make you a better person. To understand that you are far from perfect but you are unique. There is only one of you walking on this earth. To truly live is to be happy with the person that God uniquely created…You.

To truly live life means to take that trip now, instead of waiting for the right time. The right time is now. A lot can happen in life between now and the right time. Choose to embrace adventure now.

To truly live life means to be in the present, to live in the moment and not waste your time dwelling on the past, or what could have been. To let go of what has happened and focus on what you can do right now to live a better life. To be a better person.

To truly live means to appreciate everything around you. To take time to watch the sunrise or sunset, listen to the birds singing, sit by the ocean or call up some friends to get together to just celebrate living.

To truly live life is to be okay expressing your feelings. To accept that sometimes we need to laugh, cry or scream. To allow yourself to grieve and heal.

To truly live life is to appreciate each moment. To find awesomeness and wander in every day life. To make the choice to get up every day and try to make the best of every day because you don’t know if you’ll be here tomorrow. To try and learn something from each of your life experiences.

To truly live life is to spend time with friends and loved ones. To surround yourself with those that encourage, challenge and inspire you to live your best life.

To truly live life is to find your purpose and live it out. To chase after your hopes and dreams and then go out and accomplish them. To never give up!

To truly live life is to be kind and respectful to others. To buy breakfast for the person in line behind you. To reach out to family and friends to let them know how much they mean to you. To smile at a stranger. To take time to do one selfless act, big or small, on a regular basis. To truly live is to try to make a difference in your part of the world. 

To truly live life is to make the world a better place for the next generation. This one life is a beautiful gift. Embrace it! ~OC

Men and Mental Health

Today, I am writing about a tough subject but one I believe is very important. As many of you know, my current health issues make it very difficult to share or write down my thoughts. I have actually been working on this piece for several months. I know it’s rather long, but I hope you will take the time to read it. Also, even though my health issues are of a physical nature, this health journey has been filled with moments of sadness and feeling a bit lost.

Today’s a new day! June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. I speak with so many men who feel the need to take care of everyone else, but tend to ignore the issues going on in their own lives. So men, today I want to share a little about taking care of yourself.

We have all heard the age-old saying, “Real men don’t cry.” As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey, I have tried very hard to take a stand against this toxic perspective because real men indeed cry, laugh, hurt, and heal. It’s about time that we stop being afraid to talk about men’s mental health, the different struggles we deal with and start speaking some truth. It’s time to get real.

So, why is it that men’s mental health is still stuck back in the 1950’s in so many ways?

In a world that often misunderstands and judges men for showing some emotions and having real conversations, it can be frightening to bare our souls, not for sympathy or attention, but for connection and understanding. I am often asked why I have chosen to be so open and transparent about my health battle? Well, simply– it is therapeutic for me, and I hope it offers a beacon of hope and understanding to someone out there, walking through their own struggles.

From a young age, the world dictates a playbook on “How to Be a Man,’ essentially promoting a culture where men feel the need to wear a mask, suppressing their true feelings and emotions.

But I believe it’s time to ditch that old playbook and rewrite a new one. A playbook that is open to real conversations. A playbook that encourages men to reach out to other men and discuss the tough issues that we have been taught to suppress. It’s time for real talk. It’s alright to feel, to break down, and to reach out.

I believe many men are concerned about being judged for sharing their feelings and being real. Sharing my experiences and being vulnerable hasn’t always been a walk in the park. In fact, at times it’s like walking a tightrope balancing between being open and the fear of being misunderstood or judged.

But, we must get past the fear of being judged so we can experience true healing. As I have shared my own story, not only have I experienced healing but have seen the power of healing touch other lives around me.

Yes, men’s mental health is indeed a real thing and let us not turn a deaf ear to this issue, but lend a listening one, a shoulder to lean on, and an encouraging word to someone walking through a tough season.

So, how do we rewrite the playbook on men’s mental health? It starts with you and me. It begins with acknowledging that mental health is not a sign of weakness, it is not a cry for attention, but a genuine call for help.

If you or someone you know is dealing with some mental health issues, I encourage you to reach out to a mental health professional. Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your strength and courage to fight back.

The road to unmasking and understanding men’s mental health is a journey filled with speed bumps, turns, and rocky roads. But I encourage you to embrace the journey with all its imperfections and challenges.

In conclusion, remember that it’s alright to stumble, to fall, but most importantly, to rise again, with a life filled with hope, passion, purpose and laughter. Never forget you matter, you belong and you’re loved. ~OC

Passion and Purpose

Today’s a new day! As men, our first question to another man usually is “What do you do for a living?” As men our careers tend to be our identities in so many ways. But what happens when that identity is taken away? Shattered into a million pieces when the doctors tell you that you have multiple life threatening illnesses that have no cure. Within hours of hearing that devastating news, what I did for a living didn’t matter anymore. But I still needed purpose. Something to distract me from all the test and multiple hospital stays. That’s why through prayer, I became a medical missionary/coach. Way back when my health journey first started, I was not qualified to help anyone walk through their medical journey. Still not sure I am. Only through God’s help and guidance, am I able to sit with people who are going through some of the toughest battles they have ever faced. I consider it an honor to help others navigate through their health journey. Through my own health challenges, I have found peace, joy and purpose.

As I talk with other patients, I always share the following: “It is not what happens to us during this season of struggles, but how we react that truly defines who we are.” So how do you want to be defined? Health issues or no health issues, that question should dictate how you live.

As I continue walking through this health journey, I am a big believer in being as honest and open as possible. Men are notoriously bad at sharing their feelings, but I want to change that narrative as I continue to live out this crazy beautiful health journey.

We get pushed along in this world by consumerism, but it really doesn’t matter what car, house or latest technology we have. No, what really matters in this journey called life is love, relationships, kindness, caring for others, being surrounded by family and friends. I want to create the best relationships I can, and live the happiest life I can, because I no longer know what my timeframe is (none of us do). So I will continue to live life with passion and purpose. ~OC

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