Tag: Joy

Taking A Break

Today’s a new day! I love connecting with people on social media and reading about what everyone is up to. I also love sharing my thoughts and journey through social media and my blog. But I believe it’s time for a break from social media and my blog post.

The past several weeks, I have noticed the time I am spending on social media constantly increasing. I began wondering how much life am I missing by being on social media so much. The Pay Attention and Embrace Life portion of my brain sounded something like this:

“This crazy beautiful health journey is making life more difficult in so many areas of my life. I need to spend more time embracing life instead of looking at a screen. I need to make time for more face to face interactions and less online interactions. I need to spend more time reading a great book and experiencing new music. Or maybe spending more time enjoying the music of my youth and remembering the many memories that those songs bring back. As my health continues to decline, do I really want to spend precious time staring at a screen? Or do I want to make more memories with my bride, family and friends? I need to be present for them. I need to let go of social media in all areas  for a little while and give those around me more time and attention. I need to focus on things that truly matter instead of having my eyes and mind focused on some type of screen.”

“Not only that, but I really need a break. I need to recharge. I need some time to focus on things other than what I am going to write about in my blog or post on social media. With my health issues becoming more of a challenge, it’s getting more difficult to write out my thoughts. I need to use my energy and the brain cells I have left on living life and making amazing memories.”

With that in mind, I have decided to take some time away from all social media and my blog. I have no idea how long this break will last. It will last as long as I feel God telling me to stay away. I believe that a break will breathe some new life into my creativity, which is never a bad thing in the realm of writing. I hope you all understand.

So, I want to wish everyone a Happy Birthday and Anniversary that I might miss as I am away. I pray your summer is filled with family, friends, vacations and good memories. Take time for the important things in life.

Feel free to come by and visit if possible or give me a call. Let’s stay in contact the old school way…in person or actually talking on the phone. See you later. God Bless. ~OC

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Hope and Joy

Today’s a new day! The following post is one that I have been writing and rewriting for months. I am not sure it’s exactly everything I want to say, but sometimes you just have to put it out there and not worry about the response.

What if I shared with you that when I look at this crazy beautiful health journey I am on, I do so with hope and joy in my heart?

In the midst of countless hospital visits, treatments, pain and surgeries there has been indescribable hope and joy that has surrounded my every step.

Let me share some truth with you. It has not been my health journey that has that brought me this hope and joy. Far from it. The hope and joy that I live with comes from someone else. You see, as I have experienced my health declining over the years, I have become intimately aware of how fragile life really is. I have become more aware of how short, and how painful our time can be on this journey called life. This has led me to crave for a life that God promised to those who would follow Him. A life where there is no more pain, no more suffering, and no more death. 

As I have run this grueling health journey, I found myself more desperate for God’s word and the peace of heaven. There were days I fixed my eyes on heaven just to get through the day. But then something amazing began to happen. The more I focused on God’s promises and heaven, the more I felt alive and renewed. Even though my body continues to decline, I have experienced more hope in the promises found in the Bible than ever before. I started leaning more into those promises because that’s where I find my hope, peace and strength. I have to make a daily choice to totally embrace God’s promises or allow this health journey to consume me. To become my identity.

I began to see the scriptures in a whole new way. Verses like the following:

“My brothers and sisters, you will face all kinds of trouble. When you do, think of it as pure joy. Your faith will be tested. You know that when this happens it will produce in you the strength to continue. And you must allow this strength to finish its work. Then you will be all you should be. You will have everything you need.”~James 1:2-4

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” ~Romans 8:18

“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I know as some of you read this post, you’re facing major storms in your life. Life seems overwhelming at times. So, when some guy is telling you to “think of it as pure joy”, it might bring out feelings of anger rather than joy. I get it. But just for a second asked yourself, “What if these verses are true?” What if even during the toughest moments of your journey, the cancer diagnosis, the Parkinson’s diagnosis or some other challenge is actually being used to make you perfect and complete, lacking in nothing? And that even the deepest hurt will someday be replaced with insurmountable love, peace, and joy.

The hope and joy I am writing about may not always look like happiness the way we understand it. The hope and joy that comes from following God and focusing on heaven is not the same as what the world defines as joy. I believe it’s far more rewarding.

The world connects joy to a moment, experience or circumstance. So, if life is currently full of sunshine, we have plenty of reasons to celebrate. But the amazing thing about God’s joy is that nothing in our life could be going right, but with God’s help, we can still find the strength within our soul to praise, to help others, and ultimately, still have hope and joy.

The darkest moments of my health journey are filled with hope and joy because I continue to cling to the beautiful promises of God. They are my lifeline. And as I continue to hold onto that hope, my head miraculously stays above the raging seas. The storms that surround me haven’t changed, but I know even the biggest battles in my life cannot take away my most precious gift in life, my relationship with God. And for that, I am forever grateful.

As I close out this post, I want you to hold onto the following truth: The hope and joy that comes from Heaven, far outweighs the trials we will face here on earth. ~OC

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A Beautiful Day

Today’s a new day! Can you imagine the day when we are held by the same loving hands that created us? The hands that formed us and redeemed us will welcome us into our eternal home. What a beautiful day that will be!

John 14:3:

“And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.”

Thank You, Jesus, for the hope of eternity with You. One day, all the pain, tears, sorrow and trials will fade away, and we’ll forever be with You.

Revelation 21:4:

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.””

So hold on, child of God—our forever HOME awaits! ~OC

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Simply Breathe

Today’s a new day! Once again, I am sharing a post that has taken me weeks to write. Maybe years if I am being truly honest. I hope it makes you think as you walk through this journey called life.

What if we truly lived like suffering and death wasn’t something to be feared? What if we could talk about suffering and dying as naturally as birth and living? What if there was a liberty in accepting the limitations of our human existence on this earth and freedom in embracing what it means to live and to die well?

These are the thoughts and ideas that I have been exploring since my crazy beautiful health journey started so many years ago. I have become fascinated with the language and narrative around a chronic or terminal diagnosis. The longer I travel this journey, the more I realize there is more to this race than simply surviving.

Sadly, there is a false narrative that suffering and death is somehow a sign of not having enough faith or somehow someone has failed in some way. This is simply not true. We seem to have lost the sense of the precious and fragile nature of life.

My own health journey has brought many hospital stays, major surgeries and years of treatments. But as time marches by, I am finding that I am less inclined to easily consent to the next treatment option that’s offered. Not because I don’t want to live, but because I want to weigh carefully the cost and the benefits. Living longer is not enough for me anymore. I strive to live well.

I have learned the hard way how long it can take to recover from a major surgery or treatment and how exhausting and stressful it can be for my family and friends. Also how long it is before I recover a sense of myself. A surgery or treatment that is nothing more than a bandaid is not a choice I want to put myself or my loved ones through anymore.

So, my goal is to continue grabbing on to hope, happiness and wellbeing, even as my body continues to decline. Doing everything I can to feel well, live life with purpose and continue to live life as myself and not some number on a medical chart. To take control of the decisions around my medical care, to equally weigh both the quality and quantity of life. To continue challenging the false beliefs around suffering and dying as I continue to run this beautiful race.

Some people reading this will say that I am being negative, but I have found complete liberty and joy in resisting the narratives on suffering. For too long our society has hidden away the realities of suffering and refused to discuss it. Our fragility and humanity seems to be denied as we continue to seek medically enabled immortality.  My heart breaks to see so many people spending their days chasing after miracle cures rather than enjoying the miracle of the life they still have.

I do not fear the end life, but I do fear losing my identity to the different health issues that are trying to control every aspect of my life. I will not give in or give up. I am choosing instead to laugh, read a good book, listen to some great music and make amazing memories with my loved ones. To simply breathe and embrace life.

I have found peace in this acceptance that allows me to have open and honest conversations about life and how that currently looks for me. I am grateful that as I live my best days in the best way possible, I am able to have real conversations about this journey I am traveling. Wherever this health journey leads me, will be an opportunity for me to share my faith, to laugh with loved ones and to hopefully encourage someone along the way. One thing this journey will not be about is failure or defeat. No, this journey will be filled with embracing life and everything that comes with it. A choice to live life with purpose and meaning. I pray you will join me on this adventure and strive to live the amazing life set before you. ~OC

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A Flicker

Today’s a new day! As this crazy beautiful health journey gets a little tougher each day, I want to take some time to share a few lessons I have learned along the way. The following has been written over a series of weeks and months. I hope it brings a time of reflection as you walk out your own journey.

  • Do not waste your time on things that you don’t enjoy. I have learned it’s hard to succeed in something that you don’t like. Patience, passion, and dedication come more easily when you love what you do.
  • Do not be concerned over other people’s opinions. Being caught up in others opinions can weaken and paralyze you. If you let it, it can grow worse and worse every day until there is nothing left of you, but a empty shell of yourself. Listen to God’s voice and go with it. Some people may call you crazy, but many may be encouraged by your choices.
  • Do not allow any person or situation to control your life. Take full responsibility for your actions. Limit bad habits and try to lead a healthier lifestyle. Find a hobby that makes you happy. Most of all, do not procrastinate. Make the most of each day. Let your life be shaped by the decisions you make not by the ones you didn’t.
  • Do not be so busy, that life slips past you. Appreciate the people around you. May your friends and family always be a source of strength and love. Never take them for granted.

It is difficult for me to fully express my feelings about the importance of these simple realizations, but I hope that you will listen to someone who has experienced how valuable time is.

I am not upset or scared about what lies ahead because this health journey has helped bring meaning and purpose to my life. Each day is a beautiful gift to be celebrated. So every day, I take some time to take it all in. Time is truly a beautiful gift.

As I continue to run this health journey, I have learned that everyone has potential. But potential means nothing without the courage to realize it. To believe that God has given each of us purpose in this life. To turn that purpose into amazing opportunities.

We can move through a life created by circumstances, missed moments and opportunities or we can strive for what we believe in and write the amazing story of our life. I hope you will make the right choice.

I pray you will leave a positive mark on this world. That your life will be filled with hope and meaning. Life is a beautiful playground, where dreams are possible. Yet, we are not here forever. Our life is a short spark in this beautiful world that flies by with incredible speed. So, live your life with meaning and passion. Embrace every moment. Make it spectacular. Make it count! ~OC

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Juneteenth

Today’s a new day! Today is also Juneteenth. I want to share a few thoughts about this day and its significance in American history.

My journey to remembering and celebrating Juneteenth occurred later in life due to a lack of knowledge, as I was educated at a time where most school systems did not adequately teach on African American history and culture. (That’s why we can never return to those days). I believe the history of African Americans and their contributions to American society have often been overlooked or marginalized in traditional education systems. Learning about Juneteenth and understanding its significance can be a powerful awakening to the complexities of American history and the ongoing struggle for racial equality.

‍As I have learned more about Juneteenth, it serves as a reminder of both the injustices of the past and the resilience and perseverance of African Americans in the face of adversity. Juneteenth is not just a celebration of freedom from slavery but also a call to action for social justice and equality for all people. By remembering and celebrating Juneteenth, people of all races can honor the struggles and achievements of African Americans and work together towards a more just society. The journey of learning and growth is valuable not only for personal understanding but also for fostering greater empathy and solidarity across all communities.

‍It is never too late to learn and embrace aspects of history that may have been previously overlooked or omitted. Today, my call to action for you, for me, for communities across America is to be open to truly learning our history. All of our history. This will hopefully allow us to contribute to the broader effort of recognizing and honoring the diverse experiences and contributions of all individuals and communities.

Happy Juneteenth! ~OC

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Timeless

Today’s a new day! Being a cancer survivor and dealing with multiple health issues forever changes your relationship with time. It seems to pass so quickly, and there’s always a question about how much of it you’re going to get. At times it can be overwhelming. But maybe that’s why I always loved running. A 5K, 13.1 or 26.2 run can feel timeless if you’re embracing every moment of the journey.

Before I had to quit running a number of years ago, running almost made me forget my health issues. As I continue running this crazy beautiful health journey, I realize time marches on whether we are ready or not. I am as ready as I’ll ever be. Let’s go! ~OC

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Men and Mental Health

Today, I am writing about a tough subject but one I believe is very important. As many of you know, my current health issues make it very difficult to share or write down my thoughts. I have actually been working on this piece for several months. I know it’s rather long, but I hope you will take the time to read it. Also, even though my health issues are of a physical nature, this health journey has been filled with moments of sadness and feeling a bit lost.

Today’s a new day! June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. I speak with so many men who feel the need to take care of everyone else, but tend to ignore the issues going on in their own lives. So men, today I want to share a little about taking care of yourself.

We have all heard the age-old saying, “Real men don’t cry.” As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey, I have tried very hard to take a stand against this toxic perspective because real men indeed cry, laugh, hurt, and heal. It’s about time that we stop being afraid to talk about men’s mental health, the different struggles we deal with and start speaking some truth. It’s time to get real.

So, why is it that men’s mental health is still stuck back in the 1950’s in so many ways?

In a world that often misunderstands and judges men for showing some emotions and having real conversations, it can be frightening to bare our souls, not for sympathy or attention, but for connection and understanding. I am often asked why I have chosen to be so open and transparent about my health battle? Well, simply– it is therapeutic for me, and I hope it offers a beacon of hope and understanding to someone out there, walking through their own struggles.

From a young age, the world dictates a playbook on “How to Be a Man,’ essentially promoting a culture where men feel the need to wear a mask, suppressing their true feelings and emotions.

But I believe it’s time to ditch that old playbook and rewrite a new one. A playbook that is open to real conversations. A playbook that encourages men to reach out to other men and discuss the tough issues that we have been taught to suppress. It’s time for real talk. It’s alright to feel, to break down, and to reach out.

I believe many men are concerned about being judged for sharing their feelings and being real. Sharing my experiences and being vulnerable hasn’t always been a walk in the park. In fact, at times it’s like walking a tightrope balancing between being open and the fear of being misunderstood or judged.

But, we must get past the fear of being judged so we can experience true healing. As I have shared my own story, not only have I experienced healing but have seen the power of healing touch other lives around me.

Yes, men’s mental health is indeed a real thing and let us not turn a deaf ear to this issue, but lend a listening one, a shoulder to lean on, and an encouraging word to someone walking through a tough season.

So, how do we rewrite the playbook on men’s mental health? It starts with you and me. It begins with acknowledging that mental health is not a sign of weakness, it is not a cry for attention, but a genuine call for help.

If you or someone you know is dealing with some mental health issues, I encourage you to reach out to a mental health professional. Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your strength and courage to fight back.

The road to unmasking and understanding men’s mental health is a journey filled with speed bumps, turns, and rocky roads. But I encourage you to embrace the journey with all its imperfections and challenges.

In conclusion, remember that it’s alright to stumble, to fall, but most importantly, to rise again, with a life filled with hope, passion, purpose and laughter. Never forget you matter, you belong and you’re loved. ~OC

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Passion and Purpose

Today’s a new day! As men, our first question to another man usually is “What do you do for a living?” As men our careers tend to be our identities in so many ways. But what happens when that identity is taken away? Shattered into a million pieces when the doctors tell you that you have multiple life threatening illnesses that have no cure. Within hours of hearing that devastating news, what I did for a living didn’t matter anymore. But I still needed purpose. Something to distract me from all the test and multiple hospital stays. That’s why through prayer, I became a medical missionary/coach. Way back when my health journey first started, I was not qualified to help anyone walk through their medical journey. Still not sure I am. Only through God’s help and guidance, am I able to sit with people who are going through some of the toughest battles they have ever faced. I consider it an honor to help others navigate through their health journey. Through my own health challenges, I have found peace, joy and purpose.

As I talk with other patients, I always share the following: “It is not what happens to us during this season of struggles, but how we react that truly defines who we are.” So how do you want to be defined? Health issues or no health issues, that question should dictate how you live.

As I continue walking through this health journey, I am a big believer in being as honest and open as possible. Men are notoriously bad at sharing their feelings, but I want to change that narrative as I continue to live out this crazy beautiful health journey.

We get pushed along in this world by consumerism, but it really doesn’t matter what car, house or latest technology we have. No, what really matters in this journey called life is love, relationships, kindness, caring for others, being surrounded by family and friends. I want to create the best relationships I can, and live the happiest life I can, because I no longer know what my timeframe is (none of us do). So I will continue to live life with passion and purpose. ~OC

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Embrace the Moments

Today’s a new day! Love those around you. Stay true to them. Take time with family and friends. Laugh together. Cry together. Celebrate together. Mourn together. Grow together. Cherish what you have right in front of you. Embrace it all. ~OC

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