Love Through Our Differences

Today’s a new day! Well, it’s finally here. After months of political ads, speeches, debates and political rallies, it’s finally Election Day. In a few hours, or possibly a few weeks we will have a new president. But sadly, this election and the last few elections have divided America. Everyone has their opinions and sometimes are not open to other points of view.

In our current political climate, it seems almost impossible for anyone to cross party aisles. And if our elected officials cannot bring themselves to be open-minded to opposing views, what hope is there for the rest of us?  Navigating a relationship with a family member or friend who has different political views than you do isn’t easy. But it can be done. It will take some hard work and open minds, but we can walk away from the 2024 election still loving our family and friends. Here are a few steps we can take to make sure our relationships are intact after today’s vote.

Be Curious: Ask questions. Take the time to find out about why someone thinks the way they do and share your experiences. We do not need to be condescending when sharing our political points of view. Do not make people feel stupid if they have questions. Instead, encourage them to continue asking questions. This is how we get to know each other. Our differences should be something we celebrate. Not demonize.

Listen: It’s easy to tell yourself you are open-minded. But when your family member or friend has an entirely different political viewpoint you may find yourself wanting to defend your beliefs instead of listening to theirs. It’s important to resist that impulse. If you’re taking the time to sit down and discuss a certain topic, both of you need to be really present in the conversation. Distractions should be kept to a minimum as you engage in conversation.

So how do you and your loved ones actively listen to each other? One way to do this is by reiterating the point you just heard them make by saying “This is what I heard you say, am I correct?”. This allows your family member/friend to confirm this or correct themselves if it didn’t come across in the way they hoped it would. In return, your family/friend should offer you the same courtesy. The whole point of a discussion is to see how someone arrived at their opinion; Arguing over why their opinion is wrong is not.

Monitor Your Reaction: When you are having a spirited conversation about political differences that you know both you and your family/friend are passionate about, there are ways to ensure that the discussion will not get heated. Before jumping in, take some time to organize your thoughts. By allowing yourself to take a breath you lessen the risk of saying something angry and disrespectful. If there is a point when voices are being raised or volatility is starting to take over, that’s your cue to take a timeout and return to the discussion when you are both level-headed enough to continue. Even a simple “Hey, this is important and I want to talk about it, but I’m feeling pretty upset right now. Maybe we can talk tomorrow?” can make a huge difference. 

R-E-S-P-E-C-T: It’s more than a Aretha Franklin song. There is nothing wrong with questioning your beliefs. Although, to be honest, it can be terrifying when it happens.

We allow ourselves to be open to new ideas when we question what we originally thought we knew. Though, keep in mind, your family/friend should never force their beliefs on you.  A supportive family member or friend would never try to influence your opinions. Instead, they would tell you this is how they see an issue and that how you process that information is up to you.

There you go. Not every relationship can survive political differences. Sadly, that’s just part of life. However, if you find yourself in a conversation with a family member or friend with different political beliefs or opinions than you, open and honest communication is going to be more important than ever. Do not be afraid to talk to each other about your opinions and ask questions if you want to know more. The key is to always be respectful of each other’s thoughts and feelings. After all, love has no political affiliations. ~OC

Vote, Vote, Vote

Today’s a new day! Thankfully, the 2024 election season is almost over. I must be honest with you. I have been repulsed by the behavior of the former president and how so many people have continued to defend and make excuses for him. Just when you think Mr. Trump’s rhetoric cannot get any worse, I present the following.

Former President Donald Trump used apparent technical issues during a rally this past Friday to toy with the idea of attacking people working the event in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

“You’ve got to be kidding. Do you want to see me knock the hell out of people backstage?” asked the former president who called it a “pretty stupid situation” after rallygoers chanted “fix the mic” during his speech.

He later added: “I get so angry. I’m up here seething. I’m seething. I’m working my ass off with this stupid mic. I’m blowing out my left arm. Now I’m going to blow out my right arm and I’m blowing out my damn throat, too, because these stupid people.”

Trump also complained about the low height of microphone stands at his events and showed how he would work around such issues, bobbing his head up and down in what many observers suggested was an imitation of oral sex.

The remarks in Milwaukee came just one day after he suggested at an Arizona event that former Rep. Liz Cheney (R-Wyo.) would be less of a “radical war hawk” if she experienced guns being “trained on her face.”

Cheney — who has endorsed Trump’s 2024 rival, Democratic Vice President Kamala Harris— condemned his imagined scenario, saying: “This is how dictators destroy free nations. They threaten those who speak against them with death.”

Then at a rally in Pennsylvania on Sunday, the former president said he would be okay with someone trying to assassinate him by firing through a group of journalists. “To get me, somebody would have to shoot through the fake news. And I don’t mind that so much,” Trump said, when discussing the bulletproof glass protecting him.

As the nation votes today, I still cannot understand how people can continue to support a man who is clearly not fit for the office of President or any other elected office. I will continue to pray for each of the candidates and America. God help us. ~OC

The “Hypothetical Game”

Today’s a new day! A few weeks ago, I wrote about the “What If” game (10/22/24). Today as our nation votes for a new president, I want to write about the “Hypothetical Game.”

As most of you know, the abortion issue will be a major factor for many as they head to the polls today. That is the only reason some people are voting for former President Trump and against Vice-President Harris. But let’s play the “Hypothetical Game.”

But before we play this game, I have to share I believe life matters from the womb to the grave. But I am also concerned about the women who have to make one of the toughest decisions they’ll ever have to make in life. Their lives matter too. And as a man, I will never have to make that tough decision.

I also want to speak to the Christian community about our part in this abortion debate. As I heard many of my Christian friends celebrating the overturning of Roe v. Wade, this question came to my mind. “How many babies are you going to adopt, since Roe has been overturned?” Pretty much complete silence and as of 11/5/24, still mostly crickets.

Then we have the foster care system in the United States. It continues to grow. I believe those number will only get bigger in the coming years. I have a few friends who have stepped up and fostered or adopted children out of the foster care system. They are true heroes to me. But I have to be honest. I have more friends and acquaintances, who continue to complain about the evils of abortion and how sad the foster care system is, but have not stepped up to foster or adopt one of those precious children they love to talk about.

But let’s get back to the “Hypothetical Game.”

If the former president wins, a national abortion ban could follow (I do not believe Trump is being honest when he says he won’t sign it). The ban could establish criminal penalties for women who get abortions. And that’s not all.

It’s not a stretch to see each state begin to add language or emphasis to mandatory reporter laws – which require people in certain professions to report to authorities reasonable suspicions of child abuse and neglect – to include reporting women who have had abortions or who are contemplating having an abortion.

Pastors are mandatory reporters, so anything that falls under that statute is exempt from confidentiality.

So, let’s say a woman comes into a pastor’s office and she’s grieving over recently having an abortion. She doesn’t know if God will forgive her, and she’s seeking counsel on how to move forward in her faith. In this scenario, instead of ministering to her, the pastor would have to notify the authorities and report the woman as a criminal. If a pastor chooses their calling over the legal mandate, they could face civil or criminal penalties.

If that’s not government overreach into the role of a church, I don’t know what is.

Likewise, health care workers are mandatory reporters.

So, let’s say a woman walks into a faith-based pregnancy care center, an act that by its very nature indicates she is open to keeping her baby or discussing adoption. During her visit, she tells a nurse she has seriously consulted someone about having an abortion. By law, in this scenario, the nurse might have to report that.

As a consequence, it would be easy to see how illegal, and unsafe, abortions would rise as faith-based pregnancy care centers shutter and churches become less effective as a refuge.

So a vote for someone other than Trump looks pretty “pro-life” by comparison.

When the fate of the Constitution is on the ballot, nothing else should matter. A vote for the so called “pro-life” candidate could tremendously jeopardize the legitimate faith community’s ability to function – not to mention upend everyone else’s basic civil rights. A win for Vice-President Harris, even if she is pro-choice will uphold the Constitution and work within the strictures of our institutions.

In short, Vice-President Harris keeps Christians in the ballgame to minister to the poor, needy and heavy-laden without fear of government interference, not riding the bench as so many in America continue to suffer. ~OC

People

Today’s a new day! As we continue to walk through this journey called life, people will come in and out of our lives.

People will come into our lives to teach us life lessons

People will come into our lives to inspire us

People will come into our lives to share truth

People will come into our lives for just a season

People will come into our lives to stand with us

People will come into our lives to try and divide us

People will come into our lives to bring us laughter

People will come into our lives to cry with us

People will come into our lives to face tough moments with us

People will come into our lives to teach us to live out our dreams

People will come into our lives to encourage us

People will come into our lives to share hope

People will come into our lives to teach to think outside of our comfort zones

People will come into our lives to help us stand up for what’s right

People will come into our lives to help challenge us

People will come into our lives to be part of our journey.

There is a reason for everyone God brings into our lives. Do not miss out on these beautiful opportunities. ~OC

Grace and Forgiveness

Today’s a new day! As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, I come to realize more and more every day my only hope is in the beautiful free grace and forgiveness of God. So as I continue to run this race, I will do my best to live a life full of grace and forgiveness.

I pray your day is filled with amazing moments and God’s blessings. ~OC

Be Still

Today’s a new day! Have you ever gotten so busy with your To Do List, that you miss out on the things that truly matter? I think we have all had moments like that in life.

The Bible talks a lot about the busyness of life and the importance of taking time to just be still.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” ~Matthew 11:28

“Be still and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” ~Psalm 46:10

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.  ~Philippians 4:6-7

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. ~Ecclesiastes 3:1

As we look to a new week, I pray you will spend some time reflecting on the scriptures above. If you’re like most people you already have a full list of things to do this week. My encouragement to everyone who already have a long list of things to accomplish this week, is do not allow that list to keep you from taking some time this week to just be still.

Do not miss a moment to really sit still and calm your mind. I know that can be difficult for some people. We are used to moving from one thing to another. Most people are not comfortable just sitting still. But when we are constantly on the move, we can miss the signs of God wanting us to have a quiet moment and spending it with him. Having this intimate moment with God and just leaning into him when our minds are racing can give us the everlasting peace we need. It doesn’t matter how much stuff we accomplish this coming week or how much we have left on our list; we cannot let a fear of not accomplishing enough get in the way of how much we see God wanting to spend time with us. What matters most is that we recognize that God’s hand is in everything and to make him a priority above all things. We need to calm our minds and be still, knowing that our time with God is a vital part of our day in order to really feel his true presence in our lives. So this week spend some time just being Still. ~OC

Some Lessons Learned Along the Way….

Today’s a new day! As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey, I have learned many lessons. Here are just a couple:

*Caregivers have the toughest job. As a patient, I have a game plan laid out and designed by my medical team. There is really no playbook for the caregivers. Each day is a new experience for them. So if you have a friend or loved one who is a caregiver, please check on them. Offer to help in any way you can.

*Every patient has a starting point and an ending point. Of course, the starting point is the day of the diagnosis and the endpoint is the day the patient takes their last breath. But the adventures, laughs, tears and memories in between those two dates are what everyone will remember. Make the choice to truly embrace every moment of this crazy beautiful health journey. ~OC

Glass Houses

Today’s a new day!

Today we all live in glass houses

So we should all lay down our stones

And stop judging

In a world full of social media, our lives are on full display

Our thoughts, opinions, likes and dislikes are open for the world to see

We live with a digital footprint in our glass houses

Our lives become targets of the same things we judge, criticize, tear down or praise

Our voices lead us to either reason or hypocrisy when we click on those keys, when we leave a comment or choose to heart that image

We need not to be so quick to pick up that stone right after stepping foot outside our beautifully constructed glass home

Be mindful… 

Be careful…

Be thoughtful…

Be loving…

Be respectful…

Be kind..

Be forgiving…

Be slow to repudiate what we see in others…

Because we see clearly what’s going on in your home… it’s made out of glass. ~OC

Joy Filled Life

Today’s a new day! I think most people want to live a positive, joy filled life. I know I do. Here are four things I believe can help us achieve that goal.

*Fill our hearts and minds with positive thoughts. Let’s refuse to allow our hearts and minds to be filled with negativity.

*Fill our speech with positive words. Let’s guard what comes out of our mouths and what we share on social media.

*Fill our lives with positive places and situations. Where are you spending your time?

*Fill our lives with positive, joy filled people. Remember, we get to choose who we allow into our lives.

I hope you will spend some time reflecting on these four points today. I pray your day is filled with amazing moments and God’s blessings. ~OC

Embracing Our Differences

Today’s a new day!

For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ.” ~1 Corinthians 12:12 

I love hearing people’s stories. I love hearing what God is stirring in their hearts, and talking to them about God’s beautifully thought-out and purposeful design for them as individuals. I love the realization people have when God reveals this to them. We are all unique and different. How exciting is that! However, lately I have really been thinking more about this as it pertains to those in the Christian community.

How many Christians really take the time to think about diversity? Just for a moment, I want you to take some time, look around and asked yourself is my life full of diversity or not? If so, great. If not, ask yourself why not? Because a world filled with diversity is truly beautiful. A life full of diversity is a beautiful mosaic of amazing colors, gifts and talents. Throughout 1 Corinthians 12, the Apostle Paul talks about the many spiritual gifts that we have been given by the Holy Spirit. These gifts all vary person to person. My gifts and personality are not the exact same as yours. We are all different and we were made like this on purpose for a purpose. God did not create us all to be the same old boring carbon copies of each other. Praise God! Nor should we strive to be like each other. We should be living out who God called us to be and strive to be like Jesus. Together, we have unity in Jesus Christ.

Even so, our flawed human nature wants things our own way. A lot of times we see our differences, and they cause pain and dissension. But, is that really what God intended? Did God design us to be different and then fight one another to make the other fall in line behind us? No! We should not be calling for everyone else to be like us, we should be calling on Jesus to show us, together in unity, the way we should move forward. Together we can find a better way. Two minds are greater than one. Our differences make us stronger. Not weaker.

As Believers, we have a great opportunity to approach our differences and conflicts in a God-honoring way. Here are some lessons I have learned over the years. 1). To recognize that people are invaluable. They are children of God. He created them with love and intentionality. 2) To recognize that people might see things differently than I do, so I want to understand and see how they see. 3). To look to God and pray for wisdom. How do we move forward towards a common good for all? What is God’s best for this situation? 

There will be times that we’re in a tough spot and can’t see eye to eye, that might be a bigger discussion for another time. We cannot take control or responsibility for other people’s actions. However, we can control and take responsibility for how we approach the differences. 

Reflection:

Think about your current circumstances: What conflicts are currently in front of you?  Are you approaching them in a Godly way?  If not, what steps can you take to change your perspective, conversations, and actions?

Prayer:

God, we are incredibly thankful that you have created each of us uniquely and perfectly in your own image. We praise you today, that we have brothers and sisters who think and see the world differently, because together we are stronger. Help us to see this truth in every situation and conversation. We pray for your wisdom, your guidance, and your grace – that our words and actions are a reflection of who you are and what you have already done for us in Christ Jesus. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen. ~OC

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