Tag: Memories

A Friend

Today’s a new day! I am always so encouraged when I asked someone how they are getting through the storms of life and I hear them answer “I have a really good friend(s).”

This brings joy to my heart, because I know that a friend isn’t required to stand with someone in their toughest moments. A friend doesn’t have an obligation to a person like a family member might.

A friend chooses to stand with you.

I also know that it can be incredibly tough to walk alongside someone in their pain as a friend, because… what do you say? How can you possibly help? It can feel really heavy to be around someone in their toughest days.

As a friend, it can feel a whole lot easier to just stand back until they’re feeling better.. or more like “themselves”… (which depending on what they’re dealing with, that version of them may never exist again).

So, when a friend chooses to stay in the boat during the toughest moments, it’s an incredible blessing.

I know many people will say, “I’ve never had a friend like that”. Oh how I wish everyone did.

But I will say, even if you haven’t had a friend like this, you can be one to someone else.

I just wonder what this world would be like if we all decided to be the kind of friend who outlasts the storms of life.

The friend who sees their friend through their suffering and doesn’t look for the quickest exit.

The friend who is as present in the bad as they are in the good.

The friend who truly mourns when their friend mourns, and rejoices when they rejoice.

The friend who points back to Jesus as the healer. Like the friends of the paralyzed man in the Bible, we can carry our hurting friend to Jesus because we know He can heal. Sometimes it’s our faith that can help inspire them to dig deep for theirs, too.

The friend who is a friend even when it’s not convenient. But knows friendship isn’t supposed to always be convenient.

A friend’s job is not to save. But God did design friendship so we wouldn’t have to walk through the good, bad or excruciating times without a friend to lean on, arms to receive a hug from, or words of encouragement to help us through the day.

I believe a good friend can change a person’s life.

A good friend, with the help of God, can impact the path’s of a person’s life.

Friendship can be fun, easy and light.

Friendship can also be messy, hard and uncomfortable at times.

But a friend who stands through the storm until the sun comes back out or not is…

A truly wonderful gift. ~OC

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Life With Chronic Illness

Today’s a new day! What do you do when you don’t get better?”

I became chronically sick twenty-three years ago, after being diagnosed with several types of crippling arthritis. It would be a year later after taking many experimental medications, that I was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. Then over the years, I would be be diagnosed with the following: Young Onset Parkinson’s, Myasthenia Gravis, Gastroparesis, Covid Long-Hauler, Complex Headaches, and recently Early Onset Dementia. Oh, and a stroke several years ago. It truly has been a crazy beautiful health journey.

I became a Christian when I was ten years old. I will be the first to admit, I did not always live the Christian life in my early teenage years. When I first became ill, some people in the Christian community began to weaponize their faith against me. They would say that I wasn’t faithful enough, or that I must have some type of unresolved sin in my life. Sadly all these years later, I still have some Christians screaming that in my ear on a weekly basis. At times over the years, I felt judged and disliked by many in the Christian community. That is never how Christianity, or any faith, should be. For me, it wasn’t just what conversations were being had—but also how.

The sad part is that the people who wanted me to not lose faith tried to make it harder to connect with God and other Christians. Some people over the years have made the excuses, “Well they mean well.” I truly do not believe that. I believe it actually shows their true heart. I am thankful that during this crazy beautiful health journey, God has surrounded me with some amazing people who have helped me through this difficult season. I am also thankful I have never lost my faith during this journey.

As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, my goal is to not allow those negative voices to have any influence on my life. I also decided early on in my health journey to help others walking through their own health journey.

I share all this because I know that I’m not alone, and I want others to know that they aren’t either. When you’re feeling attacked, beaten up, remember that God loves and is with you. I am sorry if anyone has made you feel like that isn’t the case. What people believe is their choice, but no one has the right to weaponize their faith. That sort of human hurt harms those in the disabled/chronically ill community that may be struggling with their faith.

In Isaiah 54:10 we read, “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,’ says the LORD, who has compassion on you.” Being chronically ill can very much feel as if everything is being shaken up and changed—at least that’s how I have felt at times over the years.

I no longer know what each day will feel like, physically, let alone have a clue about what I may be able to do in the future. But God’s love doesn’t change when we are in tough situations (or any situation.) He is still with us. He knows the truth of our situation and still loves us.

Some passages that resonated with me, and may be appreciated by those reading this post, are those about us being fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139: 13- 14), Psalm 86-15, and Ephesians 1:5-6. That is about YOU. You are loved beyond words. Think about John 3:16. That’s not just for the able bodied and minded, it’s for ALL of us.

If you can relate to anything I have written, the following are a few things that have helped me. Just remember this journey is different for everyone.

*Don’t bottle things up. I encourage everyone to find a trusted friend, pastor, counselor or support group to share your feelings with. It may be difficult at first, but I promise you’ll be glad you did.

*Take this current season of life slowly. Remember, life is a marathon not a sprint.

*Do not give up on the Christian community or the Church based on some misguided people. Remember, there are no perfect people or churches.

*Find out what works for you in your journey with health issues and your walk with God. One size doesn’t fit us all.

*Spend time in the Bible and listening to worship music. Both have helped bring peace and clarity to my life during my health journey.

* Remember, sometimes God does not give us quick answers to our prayer request. I encourage you to embrace the lessons God is trying to teach you during this difficult season. All of us whether healthy or chronically ill have a different journey. If chronic illness is currently part of journey, you are just as worthy as anyone else. Please embrace that truth today.

I hope and pray this post will encourage and challenge everyone who has taken the time to read it. Thank you! ~OC

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Write Your Book!

Today’s a new day! Since I have had the honor of writing two books, people often seek my advice about writing a book. Well here’s my advice.

Writing has been a major part of my crazy beautiful health journey. From writing for my eyes only, to sharing with a few friends, to starting a blog and finally writing books and having then published. Writing has been an amazing experiences part of my life.

Over the past two decades, the journey and advice for becoming an author have changed a little. Back in the day, you needed to find an agent and find a big publishing company to get your book out there. Twenty plus years later, while having an agent and publishing deals can still be important, it is not the only path to the call God put on your heart. 

If you are considering writing a book and having it published, I would love to encourage you to take your next steps toward your dream. I pray this post brings encouragement to all writers to finally pursue their God-given dream of becoming a published author. 

1. Write the Book You Want to Read:

My first piece of encouragement may seem fairly obvious, but I want to encourage you to write a book you would be excited to read yourself. If you’re a writer, you are probably a reader too. You know just as well as I do that there are books that get the point across, that you connect with, have your emotions moved, learn from, grow from and want to share with a friend or loved one. 

Is there a topic that you are passionate about that you feel has been brushed aside? Do you have a special and unique story that God is working out in you that you feel confident enough to share with the world even if you are still in that season of life? I am a 50 plus year-old, married man with a heart focused on God and hopeful for what He continues to have in store for me. There have been books that have encouraged me over the years and then books I just could not get into.

People identify with struggles. The main goal of my blog, The Blessed Overcomer, is to encourage others as they walk through this journey called life. People that are in seasons of waiting, that are grateful for day-to-day blessings and staying hopeful for the future. If you feel prompted by God to share your story but feel your struggle isn’t “finished” yet, rely on Him to be your book’s happily-ever-after ending, and you can’t go wrong.

2. Don’t Compare Your Platform to Others’:

There are so many wonderful authors and writers out there and, if you went digging long enough, I am sure you would find someone else in a similar life season as you. I want to encourage you to keep writing, keep sharing your stories, and staying true to yourself. Every time a twinge of comparison starts to creep up, I remind myself of Psalm 139:14, which states that I am “… fearfully and wonderfully made….” You have a unique voice, platform, and group of friends and supporters, so be proud of that!  

While I don’t have a “huge” following if you compared me to a seasoned author with a big publishing deal, I still am very honored and proud of the hundreds and now thousands of people who have chosen to follow along, receive my text, and interact with my social media posts over the years.

Think of it this way: You may not feel like 500 followers are a lot on Instagram, but if 500 people all decided to come to your house tomorrow…it would be a big deal! 

Engage with people choosing to receive your updates and posts on their social feeds. You know how many people and organizations are vying for our attention every second we are on the internet, so don’t take it for granted when a kind person comments or likes something you have posted. Believe me, when you write your book, those people are going to be your biggest cheerleaders.

3. It’s Never Too Late:

If you’re reading this post and feel that it’s just too late for you to write a book, let me stop you right now from going down that negative mindset. I promise you, especially in this age of technology, becoming an author has never been more doable. I did not have my first book published until I was in my 50’s. And while I could have tried to write and have it published earlier, I truly believe in God’s perfect plan and timing, so when I felt Him prompting me to begin writing my book in January 2018, I said “yes!”

Looking back on it now, it was the perfect time because it was the season God wanted my story to be shared with the world. It was the perfect moment to allow all of my emotions, feelings and life experiences to be shared in writing.

4. Write for the One:

I hope that my experience has a published author has encouraged you to take the step to writing your story and having it published. I am so excited that you are considering sharing a part of your heart for the world to read. It’s not easy being vulnerable and sharing our hearts, experiences, and personal stories with others. You may feel anxious about all of the steps it takes to write that book and have it published, I want to encourage you to not allow any obstacles to keep you from sharing your story. To realizing your dream of becoming a published author.

When we write, we are only one part of the equation. I believe we are called to be faithful to use our gifts while shining our focus on God’s love. Don’t forget that God is all-powerful and will take our offering and multiply it as He sees fit. He will put your story, your book in the right hands at the right time. 

Write for the one person who may read your book when they are close to giving up. To quote a small part of one of my past blog post, “Have you ever thought that your life could be helping to save someone else’s in how you live it?” Your book may be an integral piece of the big puzzle that God uses to help someone walking through a tough season of life. So do not worry about the rankings, the sales, and the followers. Just remember the one person that needs to hear what you have to say and the One we owe everything to, and it will be all worth it. So go write that book!

If you need any help, advice or encouragement, please do not hesitate to reach out to me. It would be my honor to help you realize your dream. ~OC

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Happiness Giver

Today’s a new day! I believe we all want our lives to be focused on things that matter. Deep down we all understand that constantly pursuing our own happiness leaves us with little fulfillment in life. And we also know that when we help others, we experience happiness in a real way. Serving others just makes us feel good.

We thrive in community and I believe part of our happiness is directly related to the strength of our relationships. That’s why serving others and giving with joy is one of the secrets of experiencing true happiness in this life.

At the end of our lives do we really want to be known for our book collection (I really enjoy books) or how great we were at sports or the arts? No, I think we will want to be remembered for how we served others and for being a happiness giver.

That’s why now is the time to break through our fears and think about how we can use our gifts, talents and skills to help serve others in our communities and beyond. ~OC

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Dear Friend,

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings of OC.” This was written in 2019. Sorry it’s a little long. ~OC

Dear Friends,

Several people have reached out to me who are dealing with their own crazy beautiful health journey. So I thought I would share some words that will hopefully bring some encouragement. In the last couple of weeks, my doctors have shared I probably only have months to live. I say this to you, not to discourage you, but to let you know that I am in the trenches with you. These words don’t come from distant memories but from present realities.

The following is a “Battle Plan” of how I am walking through this battle.

1. Recognizing that most of our battles are waged in the mind, I chose to focus on God who is all-powerful and compassionate. The Bible tells us that God’s Name is El Elyon, God Most High, and that nothing can come into our lives that is not first filtered through the fingers of God’s love. God knew before the foundation of the world that we would face different challenges in life and has already provided the resources we need to face them. God’s plan for us in every trial of every size is that we experience victory, never defeat.

2. I chose to view this illness as a gift. Granted, it’s like expecting a new ten-speed bike for Christmas and getting socks, but it is a gift. It is a time to draw near to God, to experience God more fully, to enjoy the simple joys of life, to focus on those things that are truly important. I will thank God every day for this particular gift of health issues.

3. Although my health issues wants to be an all-consuming issue in my life, I refuse to sink within myself. I will reach out to someone else each day with a text, phone call, word of encouragement, act of service or prayer.

4. I will not ignore my emotions (which are currently like a roller coaster on steroids) I will allow myself to experience all the emotions this health journey brings my way, but I will NOT be ruled by them.

5. I will share what is happening to me with others and enlist their support and prayers. I cannot do this alone, and I will not rob others of the blessing they can receive in ministering to me.

6. I will make both short-term and long-term goals in order to have something in the future to look forward to. For example, I plan on continuing to make beautiful memories with my bride through trips and other amazing adventures.

7. I will find some reason to laugh every day.

8. I will remind myself that, in some inexplicable way, the manner in which I conduct myself during this time of struggle does, indeed, impact the spiritual world. The book of Job tells us that humans sometimes get caught up in a cosmic battle between God and Satan, and my actions are key to that struggle. (Jesus Himself told His disciples upon their completion of a missionary journey that God had seen Satan fall from heaven as a result of their actions).

9. I will endeavor to keep my life as “normal” as possible. I will continue my every-day activities and responsibilities as long as I am physically able. This will afford me the comfort of the predictable and common aspects of life as well as helping me not to slide into introspection and self-pity.

Dear friend, who is walking through your own battle, I am praying for you. I am asking that you will be “sincere and blameless” (Philippians 1:10). The word “sincere” is a Greek word that grew out of a poor practice in the marketplace of the day. Everyone in the culture used pottery for many tasks like we use plastic today. It was important that the pots be well made. Most were, but there were some unscrupulous pottery makers who would find a pot with cracks in it. Rather than discarding it, they would fill the crack with wax to cover it up. This would work as long as the pot sold early in the day. But after a longer time of sitting out in the hot Middle Eastern sun, the wax would melt and the cracks would show. Paul prayed that the Philippians would avoid this by being sincere or “sun-tested.” May you, as you face the heat and pressures of this time, find yourself to be, by His grace, without wax.

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New Perspective

Today’s a new day! This crazy beautiful health journey, has opened my eyes to seeing the amazing, ordinary, everyday gifts of life. As my body continues to waste away, inwardly I am being renewed day by day. Experiencing life with new eyes. With a new perspective. ~OC

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True Friendship

Today’s a new day! My question of the day is, “What is a true friend?”

For me, a true friend will never, ever leave you no matter what life throws at you. It’s not important whether they are miles apart from you, as a true friend will always have you close to their heart. So distance never really matter.

Real and true friendship involves freedom of choice, accountability, truth, and forgiveness. Real friendship looks at the heart, not just the “packaging.” Genuine friendship loves for love’s sake, not just for what it can get in return. True friendships can be both challenging and rewarding. It risks, it overlooks faults, and it loves unconditionally, but it also involves being truthful, even though the truth may hurt.

Relationships in real life involve different levels of friendships, and that’s okay. Human beings were designed by God for lasting relationships. Often this world offers only vague, empty relationships. But God wants us to have true vibrant friendships here on earth. Friends are the best people whom we can share our thoughts, feelings, our success, failures, secrets, dreams, fears, hopes and everything. A friend is the best person who can safeguard our deepest secret and yet will not misjudge us or disown us. This is the greatest asset which gives us the courage to share our feelings.

A friend is a real reflection of our character and personality. Friends can also be a great source of inspiration and can take us to great levels. I believe friendships are essential to our happiness in life. Although the nature of friendship cannot be fully described, finding a true friend is a priceless gift that should be cherished at all phases of life.

The following is for all of my true friends who have walked with me through the sunshine and rain:

Friends are far, friends are near,
Friends will be there to lend an ear,
They listen, laugh, and care,
But most of all, they’re always there,
Through thick and thin,ups and downs, True friends are always around,
For big hugs and beautiful smiles,
They’ll travel to you even though the storms
They’ll always be there to hold your hand during the toughest times,
Anytime, no matter if it’s day or night,
You really know when your friends are sincere, When they always show up to lend a listening ear and a helping hand. I am thankful for all of my faithful friends. ~OC

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Do Not Limit God

Good Morning! I hope you take the time to read and reflect on these words today. I wrote this back in 2010. It does not appear I ever posted it. “Lost Writings from OC.”

Today’s a new day! Welcome to a new week. I pray that everyone had a wonderful and memorable weekend. My challenge for you this week is to Not Limit God!

I must admit there have been times in my spiritual journey that I have limited God.  Yes, me. I did not always do this intentionally, but subconsciously I would begin stuffing God into a little box. I was putting limits on Him and not even realizing that I was doing so.

I would go to God with a prayer request and step out on faith that He would see it through.  Now when things in the natural didn’t work out according to my plan, I would assume they were not going to work out and move on. But how many people actually realize that God is more than capable of doing exceedingly and wonderful things in every area of our lives? He can do more than we could ever imagine, hope for or ask for… in God’s timing. Not our timing. Did you catch that?

Another way we limit God is by thinking that in order for a blessing to manifest that He has to operate the way we think things should be done.  We sometimes forget that our thinking is limited, but God’s is not.  We forget how powerful He really is.  The scripture says, He is ALMIGHTY GOD.  There are no limits on what God can and will do in our lives. 

How many of us are guilty of limiting God? Well do not beat yourself up, God is not finished with you yet. We need to remind ourselves daily of who God is. When we spend time studying God’s word, we can be confident that God is able to do all things.  But we must acknowledge that we do not have everything under control, but that God is always in control. We must stop limiting God to what we can see in the natural and trust that He can move mountains in the supernatural.  Today, let’s live out our faith and know that God is able to blow our minds.

As you face challenges this week, I encourage you to not limit God.  I know the medical scan shows one thing, but I double dog dare you to not limit God.  I know it looks like your money is gone before the month has ended, but I triple dog dare you to stop limiting God. When we take God out of that box we stuffed Him in, He will expand our faith and take us to new and beautiful heights.

So this week, stop limiting God and watch Him do new and exciting things in your life. Have a great week! ~OC

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Unanswered Prayers

Good Morning! Here is another entry from “The Lost Writings of OC.” This was written in 2019.

Today’s a new day! As I reflect back on my life, I am thankful that God said no to some of my prayer request over the years.

In the Garden of Gethsemane, as the cross was getting closer, Jesus prayed to the Father: “He walked away, about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, “Father, if you are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.”(Luke 22:41–42)

Never be afraid to pray the following: Not my will, but Yours be done. By saying that, you are simply saying, God I do not know all the facts. I do not know everything there is to know. My knowledge is limited. My experience is limited. So if what I am praying is outside of Your will for any reason, please graciously, but firmly say no.

I know this can be hard at times. Sometimes we do not understand why God doesn’t give us what we ask for. I am thankful that when I was single, God did not answer my prayers about some of the young ladies I was interested in at the time. If I would have said yes to any of those potential relationships when God was telling me no, I would have missed out on marrying my beautiful bride Laura so many years ago.

As we get a little older, we can look back with 20/20 hindsight, and say, Thank you God for not answering those prayers. Or maybe we can look back and be thankful for all of the prayers He did answer. The point is that God knows what’s best for our lives, even when we do not understand it at the time.

Have you ever forced something to happen? Maybe you even felt that God was saying no to it. You remember how that turned out. . .

Finally, I want to remind you of the words of Jesus and encourage you to remember them: “Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need” (Matthew 6:32-33). Walk in that truth today. ~OC

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Thank You, MLK

Good Morning! I could not let this special day go by without sharing something. I have spent the last few days working on this, so I hope it will convey what’s in my heart.

Today we celebrate the life and legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. whose life and words continue to inspire and make a difference today.

As I continue running this crazy beautiful health journey, one of my prayers over the years is that this journey would encourage and inspire at least one person.

I mean truly inspire: to provide real hope where none previously existed and help turn that hope into positive action, maybe even positive change, that may otherwise never happen.

It’s so much harder than it sounds.

What, then, do we say about a man who inspired not just one person, but an entire generation of people?

And generations beyond that?

And who will inspire generations beyond this?

On this day, we say thank you … to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., whose dreams, words, and actions remain as inspiring today as they were almost six decades ago.

Today we celebrate that legacy, the legacy that Dr. King left behind without ever fully leaving.

For he was true to what he said on paper, and he was true to what he said out loud. And so his words live on, some of the most meaningful in history. An everlasting testament to one of the most meaningful and inspirational lives that has ever been lived. Thank you Dr. King. ~OC

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