Tag: Purpose

Thoughts on Friendship

Today’s a new day! As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, I have seen many of my friendships change. More than ever, I have looked for my friends to stand by me and catch me before I fall and break, like Humpty Dumpty.   

But like a “trust-fall” exercise gone wrong – right when you need their safety net the most – a lot of friends aren’t there. And sometimes the fall is hard.

The pain and disappointment of slowly losing friends can be overwhelming. It’s a blindsiding blow that you never see coming.

Since my health journey started way back in 2002, I have been hurt by the unpredictable disappearance of a number of friendships that I truly thought were solid.

As I have walked through this loss, I initially reacted the way most who are rejected and took it personally, adding insult to my health journey.

The following questions have flooded my mind at different times during my health journey:

Was it my fault somehow?

Was it something I did or said, or didn’t do or say?

How did I not see this coming?   

Those questions never had any real answers and just kept me spinning in an unresolved circular loop. That began to shift when I learned that many people dealing with chronic and longtime health issues deal with the very same issues.

I began to realize that many times the friends who left were the very people I believed I could count on the most.

I began to realize the issue was not me, but was those friends. They either lacked compassion, a willingness to be uncomfortable or they just couldn’t handle watching a friend decline day by day and year by year.

I guess I just assumed some friends would always be there for me. I thought wrong.

Maybe they excused themselves by rationalizing that they were “too busy”?

I have had some friends share they don’t want to bother me. That I need my rest. You can only rest for so many hours in a day.

I have friends not think to invite me to some function because “I did not think you would be up for it.” You never know unless you ask.

Other friends have mentioned they just figured my house is always full of company. Not the case.

Or, maybe for some, it’s because they are still able to hold onto the illusion that they maintain a level of control – something I have clearly lost in many ways. No cold, hard reality has come along to shatter that for them yet.

Who really knows why some friends chose to leave.

I have wondered if it’s realistic to think we can really know or count on the staying power of our friends until we encounter and work through adversity together.   

Things that we believe are shared between us – unique connection, loyalty, understanding, tolerance, mutuality, honesty, trust, humor, etc. – are much easier when they are not put to any serious test.

Since there are no friendship vows, I have had to get clear about my boundaries and the friendship qualities that matter the most.  

During this health journey, I have had Christian friends question my faith and asked what sin am I living with? Our one of my favorites, everyone is going to die; you just know what your dying from. Another favorite is “Well you have lasted this long.”

Once I got past the sting of some friendships fading like a sunset, I started focusing on the friends who have stuck around. They are more important than those friends that have chosen to fade away.

Those friends who have decided to run the race with me are like a healing balm that constantly renews my weary spirit. Thank you.

These wonderful souls in my life, show me that there are still many compassionate people out there who truly understand how to be a true friend.

Friendships lost is an experience that I didn’t ask for and didn’t want, yet it woke me up to not settle for anything less than solid, real and caring friendships. ~OC

0

My Relationship

Today’s a new day! My relationship and walk with God has never been and never will be based on the current circumstances in my life. My relationship with God is not based on how other people feel about me. My relationship with God is not based on the current state of America or the world. My faith is a deep and personal connection with God. As I walk out my faith, I pray that it impacts those around me in a positive way. When people examine my faith in God, hopefully they will see love. When I meet people from a different faith (are no faith), country or political party, I pray they will experience love flowing from my words and actions. I pray the person I am on Sunday morning at church, is the same person I am Monday through Saturday. As I study scriptures from the Bible, my faith teaches me to simply love people because they were created by God. He loves them so I should do the same. It is not my job or right to pass judgement on anyone. The faith I read about in the Bible teaches me to love radically, to serve and give sacrificially and to continue growing in my faith daily. I love that in the midst of this crazy beautiful health journey, God has given me a purpose and a heart to love, encourage and serve people. I will continue to live out this amazing journey with love. ~OC

0

Walking Through Life

Today’s a new day! Have you ever walked through a season of life that left you pondering why God would allow you to experience the hurt, pain or even discouragement that resulted?
Obviously, there are some challenges we face that were a direct consequence of our choices. But as Christians we will walk through seasons of pain, suffering and hardships. As we read in scripture, pain and suffering will be a part of our lives.

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Jesus doesn’t simply say we’ll have seasons of suffering and leave us to figure it out. No, he promises peace and reminds us that he walked through trials and overcame the world.
I personally believe, every trial we walk through has a purpose.

Yes, you read that above sentence correctly. We can find purpose as we walk through the storms of life, Our pain and suffering has a purpose. Let’s look at the life of the Apostle Paul for just a second. He underwent beatings, was shipwrecked and experienced multiple imprisonments. But through all of those trials, Paul recognized something that is absolutely essential for us to remember as believers – our pain and suffering is not meaningless but has a purpose. And not just in some situations, but in all things.

Every individual God used mightily throughout the Bible went through seasons of hardship. Moses had to flee his family who wanted to kill him, Elijah had people seeking his death, Queen Esther risked her life in order to save the Jewish people, Jesus’ disciples were martyred for their commitment to Christ and our Savior was beaten and crucified on the Cross. But scriptures repeatedly speaks about how our suffering never concludes without God’s power working through it in a supernatural way. Our seasons of pain and suffering often set us up to see God’s supernatural working in our lives.

I have experienced this truth in my own life over and over as I have walked through this twenty-two years and counting crazy beautiful health journey. For the past 22 years, I have experienced thousands of hospital visits, have had too many test and surgeries to count and have been told hundreds of times I only had a short time left to live. As I write this morning, doctors are not sure how much longer I have left. But through all of the ups and downs of this journey, God has been right here with me. Some friends may have left during this season of health issues, but God has been my rock. My firm foundation through the sleepless nights and the painful days. There has never been a day that God’s supernatural power has not been at work in my life.

But this journey has not been a run in the park. I am sure you can relate as you think about some of the difficult seasons in your life. Maybe you’re walking through one now. Our minds can be filled with the following questions mind such as: Does God hear me? Can I still be used by God? How long will I have to suffer? Where do I go from here?

As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, God has helped me through the pain, discouragement and loss. God has taught me so many amazing lessons on this journey. I have grown in so many ways. I am a stronger person because of this health journey.

So regardless of what trial you’re walking through today or what challenges lay ahead, here are some lessons I have learned during my health journey.

1). Bring your pain and suffering to God. Do not run from Him.
When we choose to run from God in seasons of challenge, all we’re left with is our own very limited ability to cope with what we’re walking through. On the flip side, when we run to God he invites us to draw near to him that we might experience his peace, comfort, healing, and closeness. This is what Psalm 34:18 points to:

 “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.”

Nowhere in scripture do we read that we should suppress our pain, but instead, shows us where to direct it, like in Psalm 147:3:

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” 

During my health journey, I have needed a skilled surgeon to address multiple issues in my body. Those surgeons needed to remove or repair something so I could heal. Like our need for a surgeon to address physical wounds to our body, God desires to conduct divine surgery on our soul which results in supernatural healing despite how difficult the challenge.
When we bring our pain and suffering to God we recognize that there is a purpose and in time the One who loves us unconditionally will reveal his divine purpose through it.

2). We need to fill our lives with God’s Word and good people. The way we respond to challenging seasons is critical to how we process what’s happening and how healing will take place. If we treat physical sickness with the wrong medication, not only will the sickness continue, but it could become much worse. As I have run this health race, I have found surrounding myself with God’s word and with people who speak hope and encouragement into my life, I experience more peace. When we fill our life with negative thoughts and people, we will struggle to experience the peace of God he promises to us in Philippians 4:7:

“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

So as you walk through this season of trials, I encourage you to fill your life with God’s word and with people who speak hope, truth and encouragement into your life.

3). Do not let your life be filled with worry. Instead allow praise, worship and gratitude to flow from your life. Something beautiful happens when we actively choose to worship through our suffering. We are not denying our reality, but we are making the choice to redirect our thinking from one of worry to one of worship. Worship can change our perspective. Worship speaks about where our confidence and hope resides. Worship redirects our thinking. Worship places the results in God’s hands. Not ours or the doctors. Whether our pain is the result of health issues, relationship challenges or financial struggle, when we begin to worship the Lord through our struggles, spiritual chains begin to break so that we are not ruled by our circumstance but we set our sights on something higher. Something bigger than ourselves and problems. In the Bible, we read about Paul and Silas praising God while chained and imprisoned. They could praise God because they recognized He was using their imprisonment to help spread the gospel.

4). We must choose to believe that God will turn our pain and sorrow into great joy. One of the paradoxes of Christianity is that God uses our pain for our good. Meaning our biggest trial can result in our greatest triumphs. When you think about Jesus’ greatest sorrow, suffering the shame, punishment, and death for our sins on the Cross, the result was great joy. His death on the cross provided us with hope, joy and the opportunity for eternal life.

As I reflect on my health journey, I do not get caught up in what I have lost along the way. No, I chose to look how God has used my story to strengthen and encourage others walking through their own season of trials. That gives me hope and strength to continue running this crazy beautiful health journey. ~OC

0

Romans 8:1

Today’s a new day! I am currently studying Romans and here are some thoughts from Romans 8:1:

In Romans 8:1, we read “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

The power of Paul’s words are very strong. There is absolutely no possibility of condemnation coming from God towards believers. Once you are in Christ you are uncondemnable by God.

But what is condemnation? It is an unfavorable or adverse judgment made about us. God makes no unfavorable or adverse judgment about his children.

Now, we might condemn ourselves. We might not yet feel and experience the grace of God upon our lives. We might roll around in our feelings of guilt and shame for past mistakes but this is not from God. There is no condemnation from him.

We might feel condemnation from the world. Others might point and criticize and judge. Being a disciple of God’s will raise the bar of expectation. Condemnation might flow from others, but this is not from God. There is no condemnation from him.

And condemnation might come from the enemy of our souls. A shadowy feeling of failure is a great weapon of the enemy. The enemy loves to convince us of God’s dissatisfaction in our lives, but this also is not from God. There is no condemnation from him. ~OC

0

Fourth of July and Church

Today’s a new day! A lot of churches will celebrate the 4th of July today. I love America, but I have never liked when a church makes the 4th the main event of the service. I tend to skip that service in person and try to find a church service online that might acknowledge Independence Day, but not make it the main focus.

I believe acknowledging the Fourth of July should not require devoting the whole service to it. Churches might consider setting aside a special time of prayer for the nation and its leaders, in accordance with I Timothy 2:1-2. Pastors can thank God for the positive aspects of America and then move on to a service that shares the gospel and celebrates God.

One of the most useful exercises when thinking about the Fourth of July at church is imagining that you have Christians in attendance from across the world. For many churches this will not be difficult since they have a diverse community of believers. Americans, like citizens of all nations, have a natural fondness for the land of their birth. But as Christians we know that our ultimate citizenship is in heaven.

Therefore, churches should do nothing that would give our global brothers or sisters reason to feel like they don’t belong in your Fourth of July service. Such things could include the indiscriminate blending of worship songs with patriotic anthems, making it unclear whether we’re supposed to praise God or the American flag. Another would be to suggest that America is a nation uniquely favored by God, as if it is the latter-day biblical Israel.

By all means, let’s thank God for the good things he’s given us in America. Foremost among those things is the freedom to practice our faith without the fear of persecution. Let’s pray for our leaders to possess and employ godly wisdom.

On this Fourth of July, let’s remember that America is not a believer’s eternal home. ~OC

0

Let Go To Grow

Several people have inquired about Todd taking an indefinite break from social media and sharing his daily thoughts. He wanted to share a few thoughts about his decision to take some time away from the world of social media.

Today’s a new day! When I hear God speak to my heart, I have learned that it serves me well to listen.

So a few weeks ago, I heard God share that it was time to take a break from social media. Then I started questioning the role of social media in my life, comparing and contrasting the pros and cons of it. I have taken breaks before so I thought about those times, too. Then it pretty much dawned on me as the following words were impressed upon me in a real way:

I was not created to spend so much time on social media. These platforms should not take away from time reading, journaling, praying and most importantly spending quality face to face time with real people.

There are some beautiful benefits about social media. They allow us to interact with old friends and meet some amazing people from all over the world. To stay in touch with loved ones. To read and hear about their life experiences. To pray for people. All amazing things. The problem is that social media always demanded more than I truly wanted to give.

The different social media platforms offer us endless opportunities to share our everyday lives, to pose questions, share world events, our opinions and photos of our favorite foods. There is always something to post or respond to. For me, it never stopped. If I missed a day of posting, I would have multiple people reaching out to me asking why I did not post. Not necessarily a bad thing, but a lot of pressure.

The good and bad thing with social media for me personally, is that I really tried to use my accounts to encourage and love on people. I could probably sit around all day long and just be corresponding with people. People feel comfortable sharing their life journey with me. So many people feel like they’re stuck or they’re hopeless. So they would reach out to me. I found myself pouring so much of myself out into so many people. Not complaining because it’s always my honor to connect with people willing to share their amazing life experiences with me. But a few weeks ago, I realized if I truly wanted to help and serve people, I needed to make sure that I was taking care of myself. Which was not always the case.

So, I have officially been off social media and not sharing daily thoughts for about a week. I have used that time to focus more on the truly important things in my life. I have enjoyed a quieter and less hectic week. Being off social media has given me the beautiful gift of rest and peace.

Will I return to social media at some point? I am not really sure. As I have taken a break from social media, God has given me this simple phrase “Let Go to Grow.” ~OC

0

A Commandment

Today’s a new day! If we want to truly follow God, we must be committed to justice, because He is. When I study scripture, I see commands for us to speak out boldly against injustice. But sadly, many Churches and Christian today are speaking out against those who speak out against the issues of the day. I have personally been called “Woke” because I care about and speak out against the injustices I see. Just a side note to the Christian community woke is not a bad four letter word that so many in the Church community have made it. We can have a separate conversation about that topic. So when someone calls me “Woke”, I wear that label with honor. Okay, let me get back on track here. Social justice should be part of our Christian faith, not something to run from.

Let’s take a look back at some amazing people who wore the badge of social justice with honor. Fellow Christians like John Newton (who gave us one of my favorite hymns (“Amazing Grace”), William Wilberforce, Harriet Tubman, Mother Teresa and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and others who considered it their Christian duty to fight against injustice. As Christians, we must be willing to continue carrying the torch of justice. We cannot live in a world where everyone doesn’t have access to a better life based on their religious beliefs, economic situation, cultural background, skin color or sexual orientation.

Today, the stakes could not be higher. Cities across America are struggling with despair and broken systems that tragically limit the human potential within them. Affordable housing is almost a thing of the past. Substandard education, unjust laws, crime and fatherlessness are all at epidemic levels. Our cities are full of beautiful people with amazing gifts and immeasurable worth, but we’ve allowed oppression to mask their talents and contributions. But by living out the scriptures and truly being the hands and feet of Jesus we can find ways to empower the marginalized, enhance their lives and offer them a safe place to thrive and live out their dreams.

Followers of Christ must be willing to challenge the divide that exists in this world and travel to and through Samaria (John 4:4). We have to be willing to engage with everyone Jesus brings our way. This is not a suggestion; it’s a command.

The scriptures teach us that the way we treat the hurting and marginalized is a direct reflection of how we treat Jesus. It’s also an indication of whether we are truly following Him (Matthew 25:31-46). The scriptures also teach that we should pray and act to bring God’s system of justice to bear wherever we live- “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:9-11). As Christians we cannot ignore these mandate. If we pick and choose which commands to follow we are failing to live out everything Jesus commanded. ~OC

0

P.U.S.H.

Today’s a new day! Why do we pray? What are our motives? What would happen if we just spent time in prayer; just for the sake of praying? What if we prayed not just for stuff we want, but instead for God’s purpose for our lives to be revealed? What if we kept praying for the sole purpose of just becoming more like Him? What if we stayed in an attitude of prayer until we clearly heard God’s voice? What if we just P.U.S.H? Pray Until Something Happens. To be more trusting not of our plans; but the plans of God. To become more intimate with God, even during the pain, trials and disappointments of this world. To become more compassionate. The simple act of prayer changes everything. Prayer is personal. Prayer is relational. Prayer makes us stronger. Makes us better. Prayer is trusting God no matter the outcome. That takes faith. Sometimes we have to pray until something happens. That might mean becoming a better listener, humbling ourselves before God and being persistent in our prayers. Prayer is not like a 30 minute sitcom. God wants us to grow in our faith. So never stop praying. Your prayer time might just be the opportunity to experience God in a deeper and more intimate way. So today PUSH. ~OC

0

Hope!

Today’s a new day! Even as I have faced death, I still choose life. Death can never take away the things that truly matter. This journey called life is simply preparing me for eternity. I am living life with an eternal perspective. I try to live my life in a way that people around me will catch that same vision. That vision is life giving. Living out that vision brings hope. Our world desperately needs hope. For me, there is nothing like running towards God and grabbing onto His hope and promises. That hope is available to each of us. ~OC

0

Tell Your Story

Today’s a new day! One of the lessons I have learned during this crazy beautiful health journey, is we all have a story to tell. I believe God has placed an incredible calling on each of our lives. But only you can tell your story and live out your calling. Your story matters. Someone, somewhere is waiting for you to step up and share your story. To step up and live out your calling. By living out your story, you might just be giving someone else the courage to live out their story. Their purpose. God did not create us to be ordinary. He has some amazing plans for each of our lives. So step out of your comfort zone and live out your extraordinary story. All of Heaven is cheering you on. I am cheering you on. I pray you will stay focused on your race and finish strong. ~OC

0

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑