Today’s a new day! As we begin to wind down 2024, here is The Question of the Day for 12/3/24: What have you learned about yourself this year? ~OC
Time
Today’s a new day! As I continue running this crazy beautiful health journey, the days are getting tougher. But as my body continues to decline, I push forward to continue living a life of significance. I want every moment to count. I wrote this a few weeks ago. Hopefully you will take some time to reflect on it.
As I reflect on this crazy beautiful journey, I must start with the beginning. I came into this world in December 1965. That was the year God put breath in my lungs.
Even though that day in ‘65 was a major moment in my life, what has happened since that day is what really matters. What have I done with the time that has been entrusted to me?
For that time represents all the opportunities that have come and gone since the winter of ‘65. Have I used this gift of time wisely?
What really hasn’t mattered is the material things I have collected over the years. Sometimes I cringe at the things bought on Amazon. But hey it sounded like a good deal at the time. The careers, money, houses may have been nice, but at the end of the day they were but fleeting.
As I move into the 4th quarter of this health journey, I want to make sure I am investing in things that truly matter. Most importantly, I want to invest in people that matter. Who are the people who matter? Everyone I encounter on this journey matters. Whether it’s a friend I have known since childhood or a new friend I just met on the elevator. Because at the end of the day, it’s our relationships that matter.
As I reflect back on the journey, are there things I would like to change? Yes there are. But I will never regret the time spent with family and friends. I will never regret the moments spent with loved ones laughing and crying. I will never regret the beautiful interruptions God has brought my way.
As I continue running this health journey, I want to slow down and experience what is real. What truly matters. I want to be slower to speak and quicker to listen. I want to be slower to anger and quicker to love. I want to be more willing to show forgiveness than to hold a grudge. I want to be known more for what I love and less known for what I dislike.
As I have run this crazy beautiful health journey, I have been known by my multiple nicknames. I have been known for beating the odds in my health battle. Those are all nice, but the three things that matter to me the most is being known as a person who knows and loves God, a man who loves his amazing bride and a person who cares about his amazing friends and desires to be a great friend.
At some point this crazy beautiful health journey will come to an end. All of our journeys will eventually come to an end. My question to you and myself is this, “At the end of your journey, will you be happy with the way you lived out the precious time you were given?” ~OC
A Beautiful Gift
Today’s a new day! It’s only been a week since I was given the diagnosis of dementia. But the symptoms have been showing for a number of years. Since my diagnosis life has been filled with many phone calls and text from concerned family and friends. I appreciate them all. In the past week, here are some things I have thought about as I begin my journey with dementia.
My dementia diagnosis does not define me. Although the diagnosis is life changing, I will not allow it to change who I am. I will fight that battle for as long as I can. I will continue to love people the way I always have. Probably a little more. I totally understand dementia is a progressive disease and I may not be able to do all the things I once did, but I want to continue doing the things I enjoy for as long as I can.
If you want to know how I am doing, just ask me. The sudden change in how others communicate with me since my diagnosis has been a little frustrating. Trying to avoid conversations about my diagnosis of dementia will only make me feel uncomfortable and isolated. I am still me. For now.
Yes, the diagnosis is correct. I wish it wasn’t, but it is. Younger people can be diagnosed with dementia. While the vast majority of people are affected by dementia at an older age, the disease can affect younger individuals. If you have concerns about your own cognition, I encourage you to get checked out regardless of your age.
Please don’t debate my diagnosis or tell me I don’t look like I have dementia. Do not attempt to dismiss the diagnosis. Those responses can be offensive. It is hard enough to tell someone I have dementia , let alone having to defend it. You may not see my dementia, but I live with it every day.
Please understand that sometimes my words and actions will not be the true me. It’s the dementia. As the disease progresses, I might deal with anxiety, confusion and a host of other issues. There are days I may want to sleep more. Remember, I am still me, just a little different.
My dementia diagnosis does not mean my life is over. I plan on continuing to live an active and memory filled life as long as possible. Laura and I plan on continuing to embrace life to its fullest.
So please keep reaching out and treating me the same old way. Social interactions are very important to my wellbeing. So do not be afraid to call, come by the condo or plan a time to meet. My life continues to be a beautiful gift. ~OC
Broken Pieces
Today’s a new day! As I study the Bible, I see that those who did God’s work were often those who made the biggest mistakes and had to learn the hard way. Just like some of us. They were no saints. As we walk this journey called life, there are wounded and broken people all around us. They might be family, friends, neighbors or coworkers. They might be the people we sit next to at church. We may not actually see their wounds, but we can usually tell when people are sad or struggling or just not themselves. Most of us have been there at some point in our own lives. We have dealt with health, relationship or finances issues. That brokenness is very personal, so much so that we often do not want to share the details with anyone. That brokenness is unique to each of us. It’s ours, nobody else’s.
Yet in a strange way, it connects us with each other as something that we have in common.
We all have our stories, battles and wounds from this world. Broken things are often despised and thrown out. Something we no longer need. We just toss them away. We tend to reject damaged goods. That includes relationships. Often when relationships breakdown, the tendency is to walk away and find someone new.
But throughout history, we see where God chooses to use broken people.
The world is full of people with broken hearts, broken spirits and broken relationships. Maybe this is hitting close to home. But there is no reason to close yourself off from the world because you might get hurt. Again. I want to remind you of the words in Psalm 34:18, “The Lord is near to the broken hearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”
That verse is so true. God’s love can shine through the cracks and through our broken lives. Life at its best is letting the light and the love of God shine through, especially at our broken places. Only God’s love shining through will bring proper healing and transformation. When life is going well and there’s lots of sunny days, it’s so much easier to see God at work in our lives.
But in those dark days, we see God’s presence and strength shared with us in a different way. He is stronger than our darkest moments and if we trust in Him, we will grow in grace and confidence and others will notice that light shining through our cracks. But in those moments, we might need to be open and vulnerable to others.
We all know how difficult, but rewarding building relationships can be. It can be challenging to be real and transparent. We do not want people to know everything about us, but there are some painful issues that we can share, especially if we know that God is helping us through those difficult times.
Today, do you feel there are too many broken parts of your life to be of any use to God?
Believe me you are not alone. Jesus wants us to bring him all our brokenness and ask him to fill us with his light, that will shine through our cracks. So today, I pray you will lay all your broken pieces at the feet of Jesus. ~~OC
My Relationship
Today’s a new day! My relationship and walk with God has never been and never will be based on the current circumstances in my life. My relationship with God is not based on how other people feel about me. My relationship with God is not based on the current state of America or the world. My faith is a deep and personal connection with God. As I walk out my faith, I pray that it impacts those around me in a positive way. When people examine my faith in God, hopefully they will see love. When I meet people from a different faith (are no faith), country or political party, I pray they will experience love flowing from my words and actions. I pray the person I am on Sunday morning at church, is the same person I am Monday through Saturday. As I study scriptures from the Bible, my faith teaches me to simply love people because they were created by God. He loves them so I should do the same. It is not my job or right to pass judgement on anyone. The faith I read about in the Bible teaches me to love radically, to serve and give sacrificially and to continue growing in my faith daily. I love that in the midst of this crazy beautiful health journey, God has given me a purpose and a heart to love, encourage and serve people. I will continue to live out this amazing journey with love. ~OC
Get to the Root
Get To The Root
When we are sick, our doctors have to find the root of the problem before they can treat it. Every symptoms is a clue to the real problem. The symptoms can seem minor, but if we neglect those symptoms a minor issue can turn into a major issue. Sometime life-threatening.
The same is true in life. If we neglect the minor issues in our lives and relationships, the small symptoms can become a major issue. Those small seemingly insignificant symptoms can take root and become toxic in our personal and professional relationships.
I encourage each of us to take a personal inventory of any symptoms in our personal and professional relationships. Everything might look fine on the outside, but inside toxic roots could possibly be taking hold. Allow the Great Physician to deal with those symptoms before they take root. ~OC
Watch Who You Model
Your spouse is not your model. God is.
Your friend is not your model. God is.
Your career/job is not your model. God is.
Your church is not your model. God is.
Your pastor is not your model. God is.
Your favorite entertainer is not your model. God is.
Be careful who or what you model. ~OC
Relationships
Life is defined by our relationships. Some of our past and current relationships bring a smile to our face. They conjure up great memories. Then there are some relationships that bring pain when they come to mind. Relationships matter.
God is all about relationships. He desires to have a relationship with each of us. God allowed Jesus to come down from heaven to have a relationship with each of us. A way to be forgiven for our past and future sins. A path to truly live a life full of forgiveness. Forgiveness allows us to deal with relationships from our past. Acceptance lets us connect with relationships in our amazing future.
Relationships can be messy, but they can also offer us a beautiful gift. ~OC
Do Friendships Matter?
I think most people reading the title of this blog post would answer in the affirmative. Yes, friendships matter. So why do we sometimes treat our friendships like a winter coat in Florida? Only use it once or twice a year. Ouch! This post is not about slamming anyone. No, I am writing this in the hopes that we will truly think about the importance of our friendships and do they really matter.
We currently live in a society where we can count the number of friends we have. Just take a look at your social media pages. It will tell us how many “friends” we have. It even tells us we cannot add anymore friends once we reach 5,000 friends. Really? Five-thousand friends. Let us not forget our followers on Twitter and Instagram. But for so many people that is their definition of friendship. I wish I could say that was a millennial issue, but sadly it effects all age groups. Sadly, so many people have chosen social media friendships over actual real life friendships. Hey, it’s so much easier. Just comment on a friends post, click the like button or share an emoji. Who doesn’t like a good emoji?
Have you tried setting up a time to meet with friends lately? I think dealing with the DMV is easier. I understand we are all busy in life. We all have families and careers. We have responsibilities we need to take care of. I get it. Life is just busy. And all of those things are important. I am not saying we need to give all those things up. What I am asking, is when did it get so difficult to be a friend?
So, how can we actually be better friends? Here are a few suggestions.
Set a Date. “Let’s get together sometime.” How many times have we said that to someone? Instead of talking about it, set a date. Then actually follow through.
Check In. Instead of just clicking like on a friend’s Facebook post, pick up the phone and call them. You can actually use your phone to talk.
Take Time. Instead of rushing out of that meeting or church service, stick around and spend some time catching up. Time building friendships.
Stop Complaining. Do not complain about the lack of friendships, if you are not making the effort to invest in friendships.
These steps are not easy. Sometimes we are taking these steps and still finding it hard to build friendships. That can be frustrating. I have tried taking these steps with some people and all I got was silence or false promises. But I would encourage all of us to keep on trying. True friendships are worth it. Are you willing to put in the work? ~OC
The Blessed Overcomer 