Tag: respect

Happiness

I enjoy writing and posting articles on social media. What I write or post are my thoughts, beliefs and opinions. There will be some who agree with my writing and there will be others who will not. No one is obligated to enjoy, agree with, or applaud my writing. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. They can think that everything I have to say is wrong and go on to try and convince everyone that their thoughts and opinions are the only ones that matter.

I cannot control what other people think about me, my writings or post.

What I can control though, is what I think about these things myself.

I enjoy writing. I also enjoy sharing things I’ve written. I enjoy the conversations that my writings or post create. Whether you agree with me or not. I write and post for myself. Not others. I am happy with everything I write and post. I can look back on older writings and see where I have grown as a person. That makes me happy.

The truth is, my dream never involved an expectation to write things that everyone likes. I recognize how I cannot accomplish that, because I understand that nobody can accomplish that. No human can make everyone happy.

You should therefore accept that you can’t make everyone happy either — and know that it’s alright, because nobody expects you to. When you put yourself out there for the world to see, there will undoubtedly be people who will disagree with you. You’ll upset people, make them angry, and once you do, they’ll do their best to prove their opinion every time you post something they disagree with.

Please do not let them succeed in doing so. Let go of the idea that you can make everyone happy, and focus on being true to your values and beliefs. That is something you can control. It’s up to everybody else to decide whether or not they agree with your opinions or not. It’s also up to that person to be okay with people having different views, beliefs and opinions. Some people will just never be happy with what you write or post. And that’s okay. Keep living your life. ~OC

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Some Shocking Truth

Good Morning! As I continue to go through some old journals, I keep finding some old treasures. I guess I can title this collection of writings “The Lost Writings of OC.” This was written in 2017.

Today’s a new day! Here’s some shocking truth for some: Jesus is not an American. Jesus did not come to create a blueprint for Americans to be Americans. But it seems as though our identity as Christians has blended with our identity as Americans, where it is often hard to differentiate what value comes from where.

Because in America, we have substituted the freedom that was given to us by God the Father (Galatians 5:1) for false freedom that was established by human fathers. In America, we have substituted the safety and security we have in the hands of God the Father (Psalm 91:1-2) for safety and security found at the hands of human fathers. In America, we have substituted the goal of building the kingdom of God (John 18:36) for building the kingdom of this country. 

Let me be clear: This is not a political post. This is not an anti-America post. But more generally and over the longer term, I’m afraid that our pursuit of what it means to be American has undermined our pursuit of what it means to be Christian.

So the new question I have been asking is, what does it mean to be a Christian in America?

The answer to this question can unlock a freedom that is not found in the question of who is saving America from destruction but rather in the question of who the Savior of my life is (John 8:36). And the answer to this question might actually cause me to lose safety and security for the sake of others finding safety and security in Jesus (Philippians 2:4). Because answering the question of what it means to be a Christian means answering the question of where Jesus is calling me to follow him (Matthew 16:24). 

So for some, this new question will cause us to look at the pain and suffering of those around us with compassion and ask Jesus to guide us in how he is wanting us to engage with lives that look different than ours (Colossians 3:12). For others, this question will cause us to look toward those who have caused us pain with mercy and loving-kindness and ask Jesus to guide us in how he wants us to engage with the lives of those who seemingly oppose us (Ephesians 4:32). But the invitation in asking the question of what it means to be a Christian in America is an invitation to stop looking at policies, people, and parties and to start looking at Jesus.

This American question has divided us, and the world is watching the internal implosion of the Church. But they are also looking for hope. And as long as we are asking the wrong question, we are unable to show them the hope we so desperately desire that they see (Colossians 1:27).

I pray everyone will take the time to reflect on this post. I pray everyone has a beautiful day. ~OC

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Avoid the Distractions

Good Morning! I guess I should start calling these the “Lost Writings.” Here is one written back in 2021.

Today’s a new day! As Christians, we can argue, debate, and dispute with one another whose beliefs and convictions do not align with our own.

We can also choose to strive to stay so busy working for the Kingdom of God that we will not have the time to remain distracted.

Instead of walking through life angry about everything, we can take that time to not only reach for, but wrap our arms around those walking through the storms of life. To love and serve those who are just barely hanging on.

We can reach out to those who have lost all hope and purpose and are struggling to just take their next breath.

We can create a safe place for those who have experienced trauma, whether mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually or sexually.

We can strive to encourage those who cannot seem to shake an addiction, that they can overcome it and do not have to live in shame.

We can get out of our comfort zones. We can choose to love people so hard that it makes them want to experience the same God we serve. Teach them. Explain the word of God, and utilize it to explain why you believe how you believe. Disciple them and challenge them.

And let us not get distracted from doing just that. ~OC

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Friendships…

The last few days, I have been going through old journals and finding some old writings. Here is one I wrote back in 2019.

Today’s a new day! So many people kick the terms “best friend,” “best friend forever,” “BFF,” or “bestie” around like a soccer ball , hoping the person they kick it to will kick it back at them.  I have no doubt that for some people, the friends they make in their youth stick with them for a lifetime.  But as we grow older, we realize that true friends are rare.

Some friends are here for only a season of our life – school days, college, young married, a missions trip– and then when the ties that bind them loosen, they slowly (or quickly) exit our lives. I do not think this lessens the value of the relationship.  We need various people to learn from and lean on during the different seasons of our lives.

What can weaken a friendship? Two friends may mature at a different pace, or sometimes interests change.  Distance can have a huge impact, if someone moves, or perhaps there’s a complete change in lifestyle. Are there friendships that can withstand any or all of these conditions?

True friendships withstand the test of time and the changes that can put obstacles in the way of a stress-free relationship. That is, it’s easy to be friends with someone who is available, who you have much in common with, and who you agree with on most issues.

I’ve learned that true friendship does not have much to do with what you have in common, though, of course, commonalities are needed, especially since they bring you together. What holds your friendship together is a deep love and concern for the other person’s well being. You care, so you continue to be there for that person.

Friends show up in times of trouble. During my crazy beautiful health journey, I have found out who my true friends are. Who those 3am friends really are. For those friends that decided to move on, I continue to pray for you and only want the best for you.

True friends are honest with each other, and they accept the other person’s honesty. They do not let petty arguments come between them. They forgive each other. They realize that they don’t always have to agree.

True friends give you the freedom to have other friends. They are secure enough to know that if you are a worthy friend, they do not have to do anything to persuade you to spend time with them. They know you have enough love in your heart for all your friendships.

True friends are not difficult to meet up with, and they aren’t hard to keep in touch with, if they live far away. While we all get busy at times, true friends inform each other that their friendship is still important, and both of them make an effort.

Over the years, I have had some friends who pulled out a calendar and listed a handful of dates over the next few months that they could schedule a time to see me. Hmm, I thought, I’m busy too (dying can take up a lot of one’s time), but it shouldn’t be that difficult to find time to spend together. In contrast, I have multiple friends that a quick phone call or text and we are meeting up within hours to catch up.

True friendships are those that bring out the best in you. Your friend should give you energy – not drain it.  How many times have we stayed in relationships simply because the person was present, but deep down we know they aren’t good for us? When possible we should clear our lives of people who drain us and leave space to foster relationships that fill us up with hope and make us a better person.

I believe the mark of a true friendship is intimacy – your friends know and wants to know what is happening in your life. On some level, they stay involved in your life. Indeed, that’s the mark of a true friend.

It goes without saying that to have true friends, we must work at being a good friend.Even after fifty plus years, I am still learning how to be a better friend. I desire to have more friendships that can last the ups and downs of this journey called life. ~OC

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Look What I Found…

As I was going through some social media post, this post came up from January 18, 2011. As I read through it, I thought I would share it with you. I did tweak it just a bit. Even back then, I was writing long post. Here we go…

A few years ago, as this health journey consumed more of my life, someone asked me what my “Life Message” was. I did not even know how to answer that question at the time. But after taking some time to think about it, I think I know. My life message is sharing the beauty and love of Jesus.

I want people to experience the amazing beauty of Jesus in a way that makes their hearts come alive with love for Him and reveals the amazing purpose He has for their lives.

First, here’s what I mean by the beauty of Jesus. The Bible repeatedly refers to this idea of beauty and here are a few scriptures that reveal God’s beauty:

“One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple.”

~Psalm 27:4

“You are the most handsome of the sons of men; grace is poured upon your lips; therefore God has blessed you forever.” ~ Psalm 45:2

“Your eyes will behold the king in his beauty; they will see a land that stretches afar.” ~Isaiah 33:17

The beauty of Jesus is mostly the beauty–the excellence–of His personality. I used to think of Jesus beauty as only the visual aspects of light and glory described in passages such as Revelation 4 and 5. While those are certainly a part of Jesus’ beauty, the full truth is so much deeper than that. Jesus is beautiful because of who He is. Every single facet of His character is gloriously beautiful. His love, joy, sense of humor, fierceness, humility, honesty, cleverness, justice, dedication, wisdom, faithfulness, and a thousand other traits you want to add, are what make Him stunning. As mere humans, we can never be all of these things as fully as we wish we could be, and no person in our lives could fulfill all of these needs for us. But Jesus possesses all of these characteristics to their fullest possible extreme, all at once.

I believe there are four things that the beauty of Jesus draws us into. 1). Relationship, 2). Worship, 3). Discipleship, and 4). Partnership.

Relationship: Jesus desires to have a personal relationship with each and every one of us.No matter where you’re standing in life this very moment, Jesus wants to connect with us in the middle of our messiness.

Worship: Jesus’ beauty is directly tied to His Holiness. Part of what this means is that His every characteristic is higher and more pure and perfect than its earthly equivalent.

Jesus’ beauty shines in every single facet of his character, including His love and mercy as well as His wrath and justice. Think about that for just a second. Every justice system on earth is guaranteed to make a mistake at some point. Human justice will always be imperfect, no matter how hard we try to refine the system, because no person can really see into the heart of another. But Jesus’ justice is completely perfect. Every single time.

Discipleship: The more I see and read about the beauty of Jesus’ character, the more I want to be like Him. I want to experience a heart transformation through my relationship with Jesus. I want to captivated by the beauty of those characteristics in Him.

The more clearly we see Jesus, the more we are empowered to become like Him–and in fact, the more we want to become like Him.

Partnership: My relationship with Jesus drives everything I do in my life. I want Him to have what He so deeply desires, because I know that He is beautiful and worthy, and because I know the things He wants are beautiful and worthy. His desires are perfectly pure and holy. The more clearly I see His sense of justice, the more I want to see justice done in the earth–because I have connected with the beauty of true justice in the heart of Jesus.

There is truly no one like Jesus. He is truly worthy of all of our worship and all of our trust and all of our lives lived completely for His glory– because the extravagant beauty of His character actually deserves such an extravagant response.

I hope you enjoyed this walk down memory lane. I am sure if I thought about the question what is my “Life Message” these days, my post would probably sound a little different. But I would still want people to experience the beauty and love of Jesus. ~OC

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My Last Post

Today’s a new day! I am going to let you in on a little secret. A lot of the post I share daily, were written months or even years ago. I had a series of writings I had put together over the years. On the post that were new, it could take me hours to write down my thoughts in a way that people could hopefully understand. Why am I sharing all this with you this morning?

Well, I come to the end of all the writings I had not shared with you over the last few years. And as my neurological issues have become worse, it has become harder to put my thoughts in order. Which can be very frustrating. So today is my last post of Today’s a New Day!

I have enjoyed sharing my thoughts with you over the years. I have enjoyed the conversations some of my writings have created over the years. I have enjoyed sharing my thoughts and life experiences with you since 2019. But as I mentioned above, with my health declining, it has become increasingly frustrating for me to write. I will not rule out sharing some of my writings in the future if my health allows and God puts something on my heart. But for now, it’s time to step away. Thanks again for all of the support over the years. Go share your story with others. Go make a difference in your part of the world. Blessings. ~OC

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A New Day. A New Year. A New Perspective.

Today’s a new day! As we walk into a new week and are still navigating a new year, I want to share the following thoughts with you. Peace and blessings to each of you. ~OC

“Peter said to them, “Repent, and each of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins; and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” -Acts 2:38

Today the Holy Spirit is calling you. He is saying, “I am here my child. I am the Resurrection and the Life. I want to appear Myself to you today in a way you never have encountered me before. I want there to be a collision between Heaven and your world.”

Maybe you are disappointed with church, with pastors, the world or even with God. Maybe you have prayed and nothing changed. Maybe you used to be in love with God but things happened and now you are disappointed, discouraged, and angry. Maybe you had a bad church experience or were hurt by a person who misrepresented God’s heart to you. Forgive them.  The Holy Spirit is calling you today. Return to the Lord with all your heart. He longs for there to be a collision where everything in your life crashes with God’s Kingdom and you are forever changed. You will never be the same. I encourage you to pray this dangerous prayer today and mean it if you want all of God: 

“Holy Spirit, today I surrender my life totally to Jesus Christ. I am done running and living life for myself. I make a fresh decision to follow hard after You. I give you all of my life. I receive forgiveness for my sins and I release forgiveness to those who have hurt me and betrayed me. Heal my heart. Today, show me Your truth. Break every stronghold and addiction. Flood my life with your power and presence so that I will never ever be the same. Fill me with a fresh touch from You. I want to draw nearer to you with all I am. In Jesus name Amen”

“He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit “-Titus 3:15

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Believe Me…The Suffering Is Worth It

Today’s a new day! I’ve grown comfortable in my wilderness moments. The ups and downs of this crazy beautiful health journey is a place I no longer fear. I know how to operate here. I know how to encourage others that are walking through their own suffering . Because when you walk through enormous trials and God continues to show up in huge ways, you become changed by it. When you stand by people in places that conjure up feelings of death and God’s love swarms around you like it has in no other moment, you start to see even the worst pain differently. You start to see the beauty. The beauty that can be present even in suffering. That amazing message that I will never stop proclaiming because I believe in it with every fiber of my being. That God is present with us in the pain and the suffering of this world. And that He can use everything–absolutely everything–for our good and His glory. Even when it isn’t good in those moments of despair. Even when it feels like a million shades of awful. But remember, this wilderness place is never where our story end.

It’s a question that I have gotten a lot over the years, but I wonder if people actually really want the answer. The question is How could God allow me to walk through so much suffering? This is how I choose to answer that important question. Having a relationship with God and following Him for many years, I see more of His character each day I walk through this pain and suffering. I have experienced God’s outrageous love that has come through for me over and over and over again, in this long and winding road of suffering. I truly believe His ways and His timing are best for me. Let me ask you a few questions. Do you truly want an intimate relationship with God even if it means that enduring pain and suffering is part of the process? If it strips you of pride and idols and all the baggage that just continually brings us down? During my long health journey, I have learned that most people see the world through narrow eyes. They only see the temporal things. They see just what is in front of their face at any given time. And often what is staring back at them is so overwhelming–how could they possibly see anything else? But we have to look at the full picture standing in front of us. We have to think about how our stories ultimately ends.

Our God who gives us the choice of whether or not to love Him–because could we truly love Him if He didn’t give us that option? God is too big to accept that kind of response. He wants us. All of us. God wants us to love Him for who He is because He already loves us for all of who we are. And with the option to love Him also comes the option not to love Him. To go our own way and forge our own identity. We all have a will to choose, and we all at different points choose the wrong thing. And the world is broken and full of pain and how do we even begin to reconcile it all? How do we reconcile that God is still good? He promises to be our God. Our deliverer. Our Savior. Our refuge. Our strength. God promises that we are held safely in His everlasting arms. So why doesn’t He move those enormous mountains in our paths? Why does God sometimes make us take the slow and grueling climb to the top? The climb that eventually leads us up to the steepest peak where we can look below and see the landscape that was always there, but was just always over the next rise. The view that allows us to take it all in–the whole journey. To see both where we have come from and where we are going. The reality is, God doesn’t remove every single mountain in our path. He wants us to climb them. He wants us to put one foot in front of the other and feel our muscles trembling with every single step. We feel like we are drowning in our struggles and our sorrows and we cry out to Him for rescue, and the waves just get stronger. We forget that He already parted the seas for us. That our lives are not measured from one circumstance to another, but from His Son making the way for us and the forever that still awaits us. That there is another side to the mountain that we are climbing and the narrow road we walk is so much shorter than we could possibly believe. Every single step up the steep road strengthens our bodies and minds to continue the walk home. It can be hard, and it can be painful, and at times we fall over and feel like we could not possibly take another step. But it’s still the amazing road home. Will we make the choice to choose it anyway? Are you going to choose a road that is full of pain and sorrow and hurt? Because God shares throughout scripture, that suffering is part of the path. That suffering will always be a companion on our journey. That in this life we will be hated and slandered for God’s name and that by signing up to walk His way, we are signing up for some struggles and heartbreak. But would He ask this of us if it wasn’t worth it? Evil is running rampant throughout this world. This world can be full of so much pain and sorrow, and it is far too much to bear on our own. There are people all over the world struggling with more than we could possibly imagine, and why does God allow it? But would we know His goodness if He didn’t? Because there is a difference between allowing something to happen and condoning it. Approving of it. And if you spend anytime in God’s word, you will know that He so wholly and completely disapproves. He doesn’t like it anymore than us when we are faced with a huge mountain to climb in our journey –but He will use it. God will redeem it. He will show up and walk the road with us. Because God is good, and He wants the best for us. He can see more than we can and sometimes that means the hard road. Sometimes the hard road is the only road.

Evil is very real, but if we just focus on that part of life, we are missing the whole point. Because evil and wickedness don’t just offend God, they stand in complete opposition to God. He opposes it in every way–His perfect righteousness cannot stand for it. And He will get the final say over it. Ultimately, God will show just how much He does not approve of it. And the fact that God delays to set this world right is actually a mercy–it gives more time for people to come to Him. To choose Him. To take hold of the freedom that He gave us in the garden that we took and totally screwed up. Because as hard as it gets and as ugly and painful as the world may seem, God would not allow anything into our lives unless He knew that one day it would be worth it. That it is worth it when God leaves us in our tragedies. Because when He wages war on all that is evil, the fruit and beauty of our pain will be more than we could possibly imagine. The tears will turn into complete celebration because we will see–we will see what it was all for. Every sacrifice, every sleepless night, every painful moment and the utter senselessness of tragedy. Those very things will become our joy. We have to remember the full story. We have to remember that where we stand right now in this moment is not where our stories end. That our journey began in a garden full of promise and that the freedom that God gave us to love Him and choose Him, we took and turned it on its head and still He comes after us and promises to set it all right. God constantly gives us way more than we can handle, but He can. There is no situation or struggle that we walk into that catches Him by surprise. Including suffering. Including the worst of the worst. Including the darkest and loneliest nights. God is there. He never leaves us. God has already won. And the moments of our journey that we spend in the deep, shape us and allow us to become more like Him in the process. Because God would not lead us straight into the fire without knowing that it was worth it in the long run. And that is the beauty of it all. That as we step further into the darkness of pain and sorrow and still trust God in it, eventually He turns it all to light. The trials that turn into a testimony and a journey that becomes more than us being stuck in an impossible situation, but becomes about our Sovereign God and His strength and power that overcomes it. The deep that we despise becomes light for others walking their own path. The storms we walk into blaming God for and walk out of praising His name.

Remember, God has already won the war and is coming back to finish the final battle and get the final say over all the injustice and ugliness of this world. I, for one, would not have this deep relationship with God without the pain and suffering. Without walking through struggles. The darkest moments of my health journey have led me directly into His embrace. The storms that God allows even in all their heartache because He sees what we cannot see yet and knows that one day even we will find worth and meaning in those darkest moments. So the question becomes are we going to stand with God or against Him? Seeing the world as it is today and knowing what we know, are we going to choose God anyway? Even when all the pain and suffering doesn’t feel worth it, are we still going to trust that it is? Will we run straight into the deepest sea if it is the only way to get to God? Because over the steep rise of that mountain peak, there is beauty beyond measure. And just because we cannot see it yet does not mean that it is not there. Just like how the stars still shine in all their brilliance in the light of day, but only in the night sky can we take them all in. It is there. All the beauty and wonder and joy of our struggles. It’s at the end of this short and sometimes rocky road in the forever beyond. Believe me, it will be worth it. ~OC

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” ~Isaiah 41:10

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” ~Psalm 46:1

“Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” ~Hebrews 13:5

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” ~Romans 8:28

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” ~Psalm 23:4

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“Friends”

Today’s a new day! For many years, I chased after friendships. I was the one always reaching out to try and make plans or to just check in. Usually with no response. But over the years I have found that to be exhausting. So as we enter a new year, I will no longer be texting, calling or reaching out to those “friends” who refuse to put in as much effort as I have over the years. I just do not have the energy or interest to continue working that hard on what is supposed to be a mutual friendship. I am not mad or angry, just disappointed. I pray God would bless you and the plans he has for your life. ~OC

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Year of Reunions

Happy Friday dear friends! As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, friendships continue to mean more to me than ever. I love when I am able to connect with the friends I have been blessed with over the decades.

As I have walked through this health battle, I have been to many funerals. It’s just part of the journey. At those funerals, many people gather to pay their respects, talk about how much the person meant to them and reflect on the good times. I often hear people share if they would have only had more time to share everything they wanted to share with their loved one or friend. Oh, do not forget about all the flowers. So many flowers.

As I thought about the above scenarios, it made me realize I do not want that to be my story. People gathering after I am gone and wishing they would have visited more or shared something with me. So here is my crazy idea for 2025. To everyone who calls me friend, let us all commit to getting together once a month to hang out and celebrate each other. Of course I realize some people would not be able to make every month, but if you could make it to a few gatherings throughout 2025, I would be forever grateful. For those that might not be able to make any of the gatherings based on geography, I propose we commit to meeting on Zoom once a month. No excuses for not being able to connect and share life together. We could even plan individual monthly phone calls if that works better for you. Based on my health, maybe we could do a few “Road Trips Reunions.”

As my health continues to decline and I deal with the new diagnosis of dementia, spending time with my friends becomes more important each day. So if you would be interested in making the “Year of Reunions” a reality, please let me know. We still have time in January to kick things off. Nothing fancy. Just friends getting together to celebrate friendships. Oh and no flowers required. Have a wonderful day. ~OC

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