When We Care More About Position Than Protection

Today’s a new day!

I know many people may disagree with what I am about to say, and that’s okay. Healthy disagreement is part of life and part of the Church. But I stand firmly by these words.

I care far more about the victims of abuse in our churches than I do about whether a woman teaches a Bible study, preaches a sermon, or stands behind a pulpit in a Southern Baptist Church—or any other church.

For years, countless hours, meetings, conferences, articles, and social media debates have focused on the role of women in ministry. Entire denominations have wrestled with the question. Churches have split over it. Christians have passionately argued both sides.

Yet while some believers are consumed with debates about who is allowed to speak from the platform, children, teenagers, and vulnerable adults have suffered abuse in churches that were supposed to be safe places.

That should break our hearts.

When Jesus walked this earth, He consistently placed people above power, compassion above control, and protection of the vulnerable above religious posturing. He reserved some of His strongest words for religious leaders who burdened others while neglecting justice, mercy, and faithfulness.

I cannot help but wonder what Jesus thinks when churches spend more energy debating who can preach or teach than they spend ensuring children are protected.

I cannot help but wonder what He thinks when victims are ignored, silenced, questioned, or blamed while church leaders focus on preserving reputations and institutions.

The Church should be the safest place on earth for a child.

The safest place for a survivor.

The safest place for the wounded.

The safest place for those seeking healing.

And yet, too often, it has not been.

This is not a statement against theology. 

Theology matters. Scripture matters. Church governance matters. But if our theological discussions become more important than protecting people made in the image of God, something has gone terribly wrong.

If Christians are more concerned about a woman’s role in ministry than they are about children being abused, they have missed something essential in the teachings of Jesus.

If we can passionately argue about positions while remaining silent about victims, we need to examine our priorities.

If we are quicker to defend institutions than to defend the brokenhearted, we need to return to the heart of Christ.

Jesus welcomed children.

Jesus protected the vulnerable.

Jesus stood with the hurting.

Jesus confronted religious leaders who had lost sight of what mattered most.

The Church should do the same.

The world is watching how we respond. More importantly, survivors are watching.

They don’t need another debate.

They need safety.

They need accountability.

They need justice.

They need compassion.

They need to know that the Church values their well-being more than its reputation.

My prayer is that Christians of every denomination would become known not merely for what we believe, but for how fiercely we protect the vulnerable, how seriously we take abuse allegations, how compassionately we care for survivors, and how faithfully we reflect the heart of Jesus.

Because at the end of the day, protecting the vulnerable is not a political issue.

It is not a denominational issue.

It is not a conservative issue or a progressive issue.

It is a Jesus issue. ~OC

Be Your Own Best Healthcare Advocate

Today’s a new day! I have been what my bride calls a “Professional Patient” for almost twenty-three years now. During this journey, I have encountered health professionals who appeared to be more concerned about egos and status than they did my well-being. For some medical providers, I was just a name on a file who happened to have very good health insurance coverage. They knew more than me because they had the title of Doctor attached to their name. Being so foreign to how the world of healthcare worked, Laura and I just went along with whatever the doctors or medical professionals directed us to do. They’re the professionals. They know what’s best for me. Right? In the famous words of Lee Corso from GameDay on ESPN, “Not so fast my friend.”

As Laura and I began to navigate this new world called the healthcare system, we found out that the most important voices were our own. If we did not stand up for my medical needs, who else would? That’s when we realized we needed to become not only our own healthcare advocates, but we needed to help other patients walking through their own crazy beautiful health journey. We recognized being a “Professional Patient” was actually a full time job.

Over the years, we have had to privately and sometimes publicly voiced some of my medical concerns. Which is not naturally part of my DNA. Or so I thought. But this is my life and my health we are talking about. As Laura and I have weaved our way through the world of health challenges, here are some of the most important pieces of advice I believe I can offer for those walking through their own health journey.

* Do not wait to speak up and share your thoughts and concerns. You know your body better than anybody else. If something doesn’t feel right or sound right speak up. If your medical team truly cares for you they will welcome this dialogue.

*Do not be afraid to get a second or third opinion. This is your life. We only get one.

*Do not be afraid to change doctors or hospitals if needed. Find a medical team that you truly feel has your best interest at heart.

*Have a great support system that can speak up on your behalf when you are unable to.

*Never stop learning about new treatments and medications that pertain to your health issue. Do not hesitate to share that information with your medical team. Once again, if your medical team cares for your well-being they will welcome those conversations.

*Take the time if your health allows, to help someone else navigate through this overwhelming healthcare system .

*Remember, it’s called practicing medicine for a reason. Your doctor and medical staff are human. Mistakes can happen. Allow those to be a teaching moment for all parties involved. Be kind and respectful, but firm.

*Be patient with yourself and your medical team. The healthcare system can be messy, stressful and complicated. Do not be afraid to show a little grace to yourself and others.

I really hope this helps someone navigating through a maze called the healthcare system. Be Your Own Best Healthcare Advocate. ~OC

Show Up. Speak Up.

To make real difference, you have to show up and speak up. Even during the storms. Even during the unknown terrain. Even during the pain. Even when you would rather stay curled up in bed with the covers over your head. Even when it’s not easy. Even when it’s not popular. That’s how you make a difference in your part of the world. Also God expects nothing less from us. So keep showing up and speaking up. ~OC

Silence Is No Longer An Option

This past week, has been a tough one in America. For the last few years, I have kept fairly silent about the things going on in Washington and around our country. I have spent my time praying for this nation and her leaders. I have spoken with some close friends about the issues facing our country. I made the choice not to share my thoughts in a public way. Then the President of the United States decided to comment that four women of color should go back to their country because they have some different beliefs than he does. Then he stood silent at a political rally, while his supporters chanted “Send Her Back.” These comments were directed to four American citizens. Regardless of what you think about their political views, they are American citizens. As Americans, they have the right to their views and should not have to deal with racist comments from the leader of the free world and his supporters. Yes, the comments from the President and the chants of his supporters were racist. A lot of people will disagree with me on this subject, but in my opinion there is no debate.

As I spoke with some of my friends of color this week, they shared that on more than one occasion they have been told to “go back to their country.” Their home country is the United States of America. My friends shared how hurtful these comments made them feel. As a white man in America, no one has ever told me to “Go back to your country.” I do not believe I have ever heard that comment directed towards a white person. That is why I feel the comments by the President and his supporters were racist.

I may not agree with everything the four Congresswomen stand for, but I do stand for their right to say it. That is what America was built on. The freedom of speech and to express your opinions. These four women are elected leaders. If their constituents disagree with their views, they can vote them out. But in America, we should never tell fellow Americans they should go back to their country. They are already living in their country.

I will continue to pray for America and her leaders. I am thankful to live in this beautiful country. With that said, I can no longer stay silent, when I need to speak out. I encourage everyone to pray for this country and our leaders. I also encourage everyone to speak up when needed. I still believe better days are ahead for America. Let us stand together with all of our fellow citizens and demand more from our political leaders. And more importantly, demand more from ourselves. ~OC

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