Sportsmanship

Today’s a new day! The last few days we celebrated Rivalry Week in College Football. The games did not disappoint. There were some amazing moments, finishes and upsets. But most people will not be talking about that today. No, sadly most people will be discussing incidents of winning teams trying to place their team flags on the logos of the losing teams and the brawls that ensued. At Ohio State, police used pepper spray on players. How crazy is that. Which brings me to the question about sportsmanship.

Although it comes in many forms, everyone can give a few examples of what sportsmanship looks like and what it takes to be viewed as a “good sport”: We shake hands before and after games, we clap for injured players once they show they are okay, and we extend a hand to help an opponent get up off of the ground. These examples are just scratching the surface of displaying good sportsmanship.

Sportsmanship is an understanding of and commitment to fair play, ethical behavior and integrity, and general goodwill toward an opponent. It is an affirmation that an athlete is disciplined enough to have perspective, maintain poise and do what is best for his or her teammates.

Being able to make appropriate behavioral choices at the “moment of truth” and in a pressure situation will often reveal a player’s character and his or her ability to be a good sport. Simply put, sportsmanship is a choice.

It is easy for the athletes, coaches and fans to get caught up in a game and become too focused on winning. Although winning is important, it is not always the most important aspect of the game. There is so much to be gained and learned from an athletic experience that will stay with us for the rest of our lives. Good sportsmanship is one of those life lessons that should be intentionally learned, taught, practiced and reinforced.

No matter how much we would like to, we cannot win at everything every time. So we need to learn to deal with defeat. After a hard fought game in which everything was left on the playing field in a losing effort, it can be very difficult to look your opponents in the eye and tell them “good game” or “good job.” But this is what is asked of athletes. The key question is: How do we handle losing with class?

Keep losing in perspective. Just as in life, sports are a learning experience. Very few wins and losses are remembered, even a short time later. 

Always accept responsibility for the loss. Acknowledge the winners and congratulate them. Sometimes your opponent was just better. Even if they are not better, they were better on that particular day. The effort should be acknowledged. Sulking shows a lack of discipline and respect.

Winning is fun! It is the reward for your hard work. But excessive gloating and flaunting your win in front of the losing team does not promote or show good sportsmanship. Remember how you feel when you’re on the losing side of a sporting or life event.

Keep winning in perspective. Winning doesn’t mean you were perfect or that you will win again. Celebrate your win, but celebrate your win with class, respect and grace.

Have empathy for the team you defeated; win with humility and class. Acknowledge your opponents’ effort and that they were worthy competitors. The late , great North Carolina basketball Coach Dean Smith once said, “A lion never roars after a kill.” I love that quote and the parallel to what “good winning” should look like.

Life is tough, and life is not fair. Like life, sports are tough and not always fair. Yet sports can be a wonderful training ground for life’s challenges. Just like we win some and lose some in sports, we also deal with plenty of successes, challenges and failures in our own lives. Let’s try to be good sports in both the winning and losing situations and during our successes, challenges and failures.

Let me leave you with a few more quote about sportsmanship:

“One man practicing sportsmanship is far better than a hundred teaching it.” ~ Former University of Notre Dame Head Football Coach Knute Rockne

“Sometimes I think sportsmanship is a little bit forgotten in place of the individual attention.” ~ MLB Hall of Famer Cal Ripken, Jr.

“If character is what you do when no one is watching, then sportsmanship is that conduct with everybody watching.” ~ ESPN Sportscaster Bob Ley

“Sportsmanship is that quality of honor that desires always to be courteous, fair, and respectful, and it is interpreted in the conduct of players, spectators, coaches, and school authorities.” ~ Former University of Michigan Head Football Coach and Athletic Director Fielding H. Yost

I truly hope we will spend some time reflecting on the importance of sportsmanship in all areas of sports and life. ~OC

Let Go of Fear

Has fear controlled your life? At some point in our lives, everyone has dealt with fear. For some, fear has paralyzed them. Kept them from truly living life.

During my 17-year and counting crazy beautiful health journey, fear has reared its ugly head several times in my life. I remember the first diagnosis so many years ago. Cancer. How could I possibly have cancer? Fear gripped my wife and I after that diagnosis. We had only been married a few years at that point. We had so many plans. Would we even have another year together? This scene has played out in our marriage many times over the years, as I have been diagnosed with one life threatening health issues after another. How have we dealt with the different fears that have tried to steal our happiness?

Prayer. I know this sounds simple, but a lot of times we reach for everything but prayer. Prayer becomes a second or tenth option. I would encourage everyone to make prayer your first option. I can personally testify to the power of prayer and faith in my own journey. I know I would not be alive today, writing this post if not for prayer. Not just my prayers, but the prayers of many. Whatever you may be going through today, I encourage you to pray and don’t be afraid to ask for prayer. People genuinely want to pray for you. Let them.

Team. Do not try to walk through your fears, or life for that matter, by yourself. We were not created to do life alone. The Lone Ranger may have been a good tv show/movie, but is a terrible lifestyle choice. During my health journey, my wife and I have surrounded ourselves with an amazing team of people. Team Todd has helped us walk through some of the most difficult days of our lives. People want to help, so let them.

Keep Living. This is much easier said than done. The fears and all the junk life throws at us can become overwhelming. We have all been there. Laura and I made the choice early on in this crazy beautiful journey to keep living. We decided not to just live, but to Thrive. Todd, what does that even mean? Thriving means not letting your current circumstances define you. Thriving means taking a last-minute cruise. Thriving means spending quality time with family and friends. Thriving means stepping outside of your comfort zone. I could go on, but I think you get the idea. Don’t allow your fears or your current circumstances to keep you from living a beautiful and blessed life.

Find Purpose. During my crazy beautiful journey, I knew there had to be more than doctors appointments, hospital stays and multiple medications. There just had to be. Finding purpose in this journey allowed me to overcome my fears. During the past 17 years, God has allowed me to use my story to encourage others. To pray for someone going through their own journey. To hold their hand and guide them through the toughest moments of their lives. To walk them through their fears. So what is your purpose?

Does doing these four things guarantee you will no longer deal with fear? Unfortunately no. After all these years, I still deal with fear at times. But I do not live in fear. Fear does not control me. The power of Prayer/Faith, Team, Thriving and Purpose help me let go of any fears that come my way. Faith>Fear. ~OC

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