Growing In God

Today’s a new day! As I continue to walk through this crazy beautiful health journey, God continues to share amazing lessons with me. I wanted to share some of those lessons with you.

During times of pain, aches, fear and the brokenness, God has been and continues to stay near (Psalm 34:18).

God continues to teach me the value of slowing down. The importance of saying no. The importance of patience. The importance of truly being present.
The importance of doing one thing at a time. (Because I used to pride myself in multi-tasking, something I am not great at these days).
The importance of being okay with not being okay.

God continues to teach me the importance of being silent.
The importance of excepting help from others. The importance of caring and unselfish family and friends. The importance of genuine friendships. The importance of embracing the miracles of daily courage.

God continues to teach me the importance of pausing long enough to have meaningful and life-giving conversations. The beauty of observing life at a slower pace. The importance of just laughing with loved ones and sometimes shedding some tears.The blessing of having a bride who shows kindness and demonstrates what in sickness and in health really looks like.

God continues to teach me how to be kind and compassionate to others and myself.

Do I want to continue struggling with the effects of my health issues? Absolutely not! Do I want to continue experiencing the goodness of God as I take refuge in Him? Absolutely! (Psalm 34:8)

As we prepare to say goodbye to 2023 and say hello to a New Year, I have no idea what 2024 will bring. None of us do. I want to continue encouraging and serving others. I want to be a better husband and friend. I want to continue to grow. What I do know is that my heart desires to continue praising God at all times; His praise will continually be on my lips this new year. (Psalm 34:1). ~OC

Memories Along the Journey

Today’s a new day! As I have traveled this crazy beautiful health journey, I see things differently than I used to. Some life experiences and hopefully a little wisdom. My physical memory can be a bit tricky with the neurological issues and Long Covid issues, but my heart memory is in great condition. While I often forget day to day things, I am constantly remembering things that are far more important.

I remember the day I met my bride and how life has never been the same since. So many amazing memories.

I remember the beautiful friends God has blessed me with since childhood. So many amazing memories.

I remember that I need to be… want to be…. a man of honor and integrity. Hopefully a man of compassion and generosity. Because one day, I will become a memory in the lives of those that I love and I want those memories to be ones they will cherish.

I remember that the pursuits of this world… fame, fortune, power, position, success (whatever that means)… are not at all important. They’re just not.

I remember that I need to tell Laura and other loved ones every day that I love them. Not just tell them but show them because life is short. I never want to miss an opportunity to let my family and friends know what they mean to me.

This health journey is not an easy one. People often tell me how well I handle all that has been thrown at me, but the journey has not been easy. This journey has been and continues to be filled with tough moments. My health journey has definitely been an inconvenience in so many ways. It is something I would never wish on anyone. But while I continue to walk through the challenges of this health crisis, there are good things that can be taken from it. Lessons learned and hopefully more lessons to come. Some amazing memories made and hopefully many more memories to be made.

As I continue to walk this journey, I will never allow it to consume me. It will never become my identity.

I love the words in Genesis 50:20:
You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people. Don’t you see, you planned evil against me but God used those same plans for my good, as you see all around you right now – life for many people.

I have an opportunity in front of me that most people rarely get. I have had the opportunity to reclaim life from a place where there is usually death.
That makes me one of the most blessed individuals on earth. ~OC

Total Freedom

Today’s a new day! There is complete and total freedom in Jesus. We will never experience true freedom in our finances or social status. No, true freedom and joy comes from surrendering our entire lives to Jesus.
We will still have aching questions and burning disappointments that we will bring to God. We still do not understand all the mysteries of life. Our future is still full of questions and imperfections.

But that doesn’t have to hold us back from continuing to lean into the promises of Jesus. When we have faith that He is working, even now, we are filled with peace. It’s out of our hands and it’s in the hands that were pierced for each of us. In the midst of the storms of life, our Jesus continues to work. He is focused on our now and walking with us through the storms. Do not miss the lessons He has for you in the valley moments. Jesus is focused on the big picture. The results are going to be glorious. Keep leaning in. ~OC

Still Standing

Today’s a new day! I am still standing. On 3/20/09 after having what doctors thought was a cold, my wife Laura was informed she needed to take me to the emergency room. I was having trouble breathing and was extremely weak. My cold actually ended up being Myasthenia Gravis. I was in a Myasthenic Crisis. Some doctors were concerned I would not make it through the the night. Most thought I would not make it through the year. Here we are 14 years later and I am still standing. Still fighting. Still thriving.

This twenty-one year crazy beautiful health journey has not been easy. On more than one occasion, Laura has been told by doctors that my condition was critical and things did not look promising. Throughout this journey, Laura and I have looked to God for guidance, strength and wisdom. He has never failed us. We do not know what the future holds for me health wise, but we know who holds our future. Laura and I will continue to make beautiful memories. We will continue to encourage people with our story. I will continue to fight. After all these years, I am still standing. Still praising God. ~OC

Choose Joy

Today’s a new day! I have learned through the storms of life that joy and happiness are things we have to become intentional about. It’s about the decisions we make moment by moment.

So many people allow everyday joy to escape them because they are focused on what they don’t like, what their lacking, and what is broken. Easy to do. We can allow our circumstances and comparing ourselves to others to rob of us of happiness and joy. What I have learned through my own life storms is when I want to have a pity party, is that the best use of my time. Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I have chosen to find the things that I am grateful for as I navigate through the crashing waves.

One of the most positive things I have ever done in my life is to journal and share my story. What has been so interesting and encouraging is hearing the feedback back from those walking through their own battles. As I have heard the inspiring stories of others, I have been filled with gratitude. My circumstances may have not changed, but I did. I chose a new way of looking at life.

I have had the privilege of praying with people during the worst moments of their lives. But instead of being caught up in the negativity of the moment, they were filled with joy. How can that be? I honestly believe that joy is less circumstantial and more an inward reality that is fueled from a heart of faith and gratitude. People that choose to live with more hope and joy view life differently. Peace, Hope and Joy become a lifestyle. They embrace and savor every moment of life.

In these challenging times when there is so much negative news swirling around us, it’s so important for us to take care of ourselves and those around us. We need to laugh, have fun, take a trip and embrace some joy breaks along this journey called life. I encourage everyone to find joy by making time for it and becoming intentional about it. Choose joy and choose it every day. ~OC

Growth

Today’s a new day! Life can be filled with lots of trials and tribulations. As we walk through these trials, we must learn how to endure and overcome those storms. As we endure, we grow in character. As we grow in character, we grow in hope. This hope comes from God, who walks with us through every trial. Our pain and trials bears evidence of the life changing spirit of God living in and through us.

Some days, I have no strength or desire to go for my morning walk. But when I put my shoes on and get out the door, I see the beauty of God’s creation. I realize God has called me to live in his strength.

Some days I wrestle with questions and emotions about why God has me on this crazy beautiful health journey. I am thankful God is patient with me during these moments. He patiently and lovingly reminds me of my purpose during this journey. So I shake off the negative thoughts and take another step forward. Trusting and believing God will continue to bless and meet my needs.

Dear Friends, I pray your hope is not based on your own strength and ability to walk through the trials of life on your own. God is bigger than any trial we will endure. He is waiting for us to lean into his loving strong embrace. God does not want us walking this journey alone. He is using these trials to grow us and teach us life changing lessons. I know that is not always easy. But our aim is not perfection (on this side of heaven), but it’s growth. So continue to keep growing where God has you planted. ~OC

Be Kind Always

Today’s a new day! I mostly write about life and the lessons God continues to teach me. Some lessons can be tough to walk through. Being open and honest about my crazy, beautiful journey on social media can be challenging. I choose to share some of my toughest moments because I truly believe sharing our stories can help others. Even if it’s just one person. Remember, everyone is going through something in life.

The point is, you never know what storms people are dealing with inside, nor what they’ve had to face in life. As I have been open about health journey the last 20 years, many people have shared their own life experiences with me. I have been uplifted and heartbroken at what some friends and strangers have shared with me in confidence. They have not shared these thoughts and feelings with their own family. You just never know the struggles people are walking through.

That is why we need to show love and grace to everyone we encounter. Everyone is walking though a storm we know nothing about. I encourage everyone, including myself to stop and listen to our loved ones and the stranger at the coffee shop. You might be the one God has chosen to walk with that person through the storm they are facing. Do not miss out on a beautiful interruption. Be kind always. ~OC

The Boat

Today’s a new day! At one point during my beautiful life, my friendship list looked like a big cruise ship. Many people laughing and having fun. Life was great. Then I got sick and the boat began to get smaller. Of course that was rough to endure, but God gave me peace.

Then I experienced a beautiful miracle and all of the sudden the boat started getting bigger, but most of the relationships were not real. They were based on what God had done in my life. People cared more about the miracle than they did about me. Once again tough to endure, but God guided me through this storm. He even told me on a walk one early August morning, that my inner circle would get smaller. There would be fewer people on the boat. This did not scare me, it actually gave me peace.

Then I had a stroke a few weeks ago and more friends jumped off the boat. This time I was prepared for it. Less phone calls checking in or returning my calls or text. God had clearly prepared me for this time. That doesn’t mean there was not some pain and disappointment.

But as I continue to walk through this new crazy beautiful health journey, I cling to the friends who have decided to stay in the boat with me. The ones who actually reach out to me without any prompting and reassure me they are not leaving the boat regardless of how big the waves get. We will endure together. How blessed to have people in the boat who reassure me they are not abandoning me. Who tell me they don’t care how small the boat gets. No matter how rough the waves become. “Todd, I am not leaving the boat.” How encouraging those words are as Laura and I move through this new storm.

As I wrote the words above, I realized I have never needed rescuing from the boat. God has always been and always will be in the boat with me. He has never thought about abandoning me. I am thankful for those God chooses stay in the boat with me. But my hope and peace comes from God who created the boat and me. The One who can calm the raging seas with just a whisper.

If you are dealing with a storm in your life, look around and see who’s in your boat. When you find them cherish them. During the storms of life, learn to sit in the boat with others. Embrace those in the boat. Encourage those in the boat. Empower those in the boat. ~OC

Lessons Along The Journey

I have been dealing with multiple life threatening health issues for 20 years. I have had ups and downs during this journey. Throughout the years, people have said some crazy things to Laura and I. I am sure most meant well, but that’s not the way it always came across. Here is a list to help you have positive conversations with someone dealing with serious medical issues. I will expound on some and some do not need any explanation.

*Well, Todd lasted this long. Yes, someone said that to Laura. Please do not say that to her or me.

*How are doing/How’s your health? I know people mean well, but I am more than my health. I really do not care to spend the whole visit discussing my health. Some days I am not even sure how I am feeling. I know that sounds strange, but it’s true. (Hear is a free suggestion: Asked how Laura is doing? As a caregiver, her job is much tougher than mine).

*Do not hug me unless I move in for a hug. Let me initiate all physical contact. Not being mean, but my immune system is compromised.

*If I choose to wear a mask that’s my decision. Please do not make it a political or religious issue. It’s my life.

*If I choose to take a flu shot or some other vaccination that’s my business. Once again, do not make it a political or religious issue.

*Do not just show up for a visit. I could be resting or visiting with other guest. Please call first. Also do not stay all day.

*Do not say, I hate seeing you go through this. My current situation is what it is. I know people mean well, but I do not need a reminder I am sick. My body does a good job of reminding me.

*Do not say, Let me know if I can do anything for you if you do not mean it. I know that might sound harsh, but a lot of people say that just to be kind.

*Do not make my health journey about you. I am sorry if you lost a loved one to an illness I am dealing with, but it does not help if that is that’s all you talk about. Sorry.

*Do not tell me my health issues are caused by some spirit or sin in my life. Laura and I will shut you down. We do not need your poor theology in our lives.

*Do not tell me how I should handle my health issues. This journey is not yours. Laura and I will continue to look to God for His guidance and wisdom.

*Do not say how brave I am. Thanks for the compliment, but I do not always feel brave. Also I did not choose my health issues. It’s just life. I will continue to live a life that hopefully encourages others, but there will be days I do not want or feel like an inspiration.

I share these tips to help educate not to criticize. There is not a playbook on how to walk through a health journey. Please feel free to reach out to me with any questions or suggestions. ~OC

The Dance

As I travel this journey, my life has been blessed with meeting people walking through the same dance. A dance no one ever wants to experience. A dance filled with pain and many days sitting in a chair while you experience the drip, drip from your IV. Days filled with tears, but also filled with sweet memories as you laugh with other conquerors doing the same dance. Oh the memories we shared. Our bodies fighting to enjoy another dance. How could we have known the music would end for some and they would say their goodbyes. Oh the memories of the dance. We never thought we would say goodbye. As I continue to walk through this journey, I will think about those that have taken a bow and completed their dance. I will embrace the memories we shared and continue to dance. ~OC

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