Tag: Thriving

Live Out Your Legacy

Today’s a new day! As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, here are some lessons I have learned along the way. I pray you will spend some time looking them ever.

Do you truly know yourself? Spend some time in self reflection. As a person of faith, I spend a lot of time in prayer asking God to reveal the good, the bad and how I can be the person that created me. I encourage each of you to find out what works for you.

Our words and actions make a difference. I personally want my life to be full of encouraging words and life changing actions. It’s simple to share a kind word or smile. Forgiveness is a beautiful gift for all parties. It brings freedom and healing.

What is the legacy you want to live out? As I continue to fight for my life, I have had a lot of time to reflect on my life. I really do not care about career or finances, even though those are important things. But as I move into the 4th quarter of my journey, I think about the time spent with my bride, family and friends. The memories made. I think about the many conversations with fellow patients as they walk through their own health journey. The encouragement, the laughs and tears. That is the legacy I want to live out. I encourage everyone to spend some time to reflecting on what legacy you want to live out.

Remember to laugh? Stop taking life so seriously. Do not allow yourself to get so caught up in work, school, ministry or life that you forget to laugh. When’s the last time you really laughed?

Sometimes there are no laters in life. People spend a lot of time saying “I will do it later.” What happens when they’re no more “Laters.” I encourage everyone to make sure your time on earth counts. Take in the amazing life around you. Not just the screen in front of your face. Stop focusing on quantity and spend more time on quality. Live well now. Let me asked you a few questions: 1). Do you have any “laters”that if you could do life over would become now’s? 2). Do you have some “laters” that have turned into “never’s”?

Here is one of my favorite quotes: “Open your eyes, look within. Are you satisfied with the life you’ve living?” ~Bob Marley

Here is my last question: How are you living? ~OC

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Worthy

Today’s a new day!

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.. ~Romans 8:38-39

A lot of things can try and separate us from God. Not feeling good enough, the business of life, the upcoming election and a host of other distractions. But we have to remember that these thoughts and distractions are only temporary and we do not have to give into them. If we let them consume us, we will easily become overwhelmed. But we can choose to open our heart’s to God’s truth. That is, we are enough, just by being us. We are not our past, nor do we have to return to our past in order to be loved, accepted, etc. we are enough – right here, right now – because our identity is in God, not in our weaknesses, and certainly not in the things of this world.

Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. ~John 8:32

I read a story where a group of students were asked how much they thought they were worth. “A million dollars,” some of them said. “Infinity plus infinity,” called out another. But the truth is, we are worth more than we can possibly comprehend. We are way more than a number. God loves us so much that He sent His only son to die for us so that we will not die but have everlasting life with Him in Heaven.

So, I am going to pose a challenge for everyone – myself included: When those thoughts of not being good enough rise within you and you feel like you’re drowning in their lies, seek God. Remember His truth – YOU ARE ENOUGH. You were created in His image (Genesis 1:27), and He loves you. You do not have to change what you look like to be loved, and you may as well stop trying to earn grace because it has already been given to you. Find strength in God, and know He is with you wherever you go.

Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident. ~Psalm 27:3

We can find confidence in God today. We can treat ourselves with love and self respect because we’re God’s beautiful masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10). We can trust that we are enough. We can find peace, hope, love and confidence in God. I pray we will all lean into that truth today. ~OC

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A Night With Dementia and Parkinson’s

Good morning! I pray everyone is sleeping and will see this after a great night sleep.

I can tell tonight’s going to be one of the nights. I wrote the following to share what those sleepless, hallucination filled nights are like. I wrote the following to give you a glimpse into my life with Dementia and Parkinson’s on most nights. ~OC

A Night With Dementia and Parkinson’s:

When it gets deep in the night

Where time seems to stand still

I can hear my heart beat and my thoughts screaming and that’s not always a good thing

It’s going to be one of those nights

Where sleep is a distant dream

Sometimes the voices get loud

And the hallucinations seem so real, I have to remind myself they’re not legit, just a short circuit in my brain

But through it all, I stand tall

Not allowing all those voices and thoughts to become real

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

I will focus on the prize

Not all the junk, this disease

tries to steal from my mind

I keep fighting, gettin off the canvas

I keep running towards the One who

clears the cobwebs and reminds me

I am His precious child

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

I will continue to fight through the

night, all the negative thoughts

that keep me from counting sheep

and getting a good night sleep

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

The giants who try to bring me

down at night, are no match for

the One who used a boy named David to bring down one of the biggest

giants of all

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

It’s time to be Brave

It’s time to keep Overcoming

It’s time to be Fearless

I am ready to Battle

Refusing to back down

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

I am focused on the mission

Not going to backdown

Not going to run away

Going to walk with the King

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

As the night slowly creeps on

I will press into the promises

of my King, thankful they get me

through another night, time to be

fearless and pray through it all

I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

As the night moves on and

My thoughts begin to wonder

the adrenaline starts flowing

and God’s angels get moving

the morning light will soon come shining

So, I will keep standing tall

Lifting up my prayers

to the One who created it all

I will keep fighting, refusing to fall

choosing to embrace faith over it all

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Embrace Your “Can’t”

Today’s a new day! I used to tell people that the word “Can’t” should never be uttered from their mouth. I used to use the popular phrases “Just Do It,” and “Sleep when you’re dead.” Yes, I was that guy.

In today’s world, we are pushed and even encouraged to take on more and more, and we are seen as weak or strange when we are unable, or do not want to do so.

For me, this mindset came from my passion for life. It was fueled by a deep craving to achieve everything in life. It’s what made me intense, driven, competitive, and hardworking. It was who I was. Until I wasn’t.

As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey for 22 years, it took me some time to come to terms with my “can’t.” Early on in my health journey, I constantly pushed through truly excruciating symptoms, like level 10 pain, exhaustion from weeks of no sleep, and unrelenting crushing fatigue even when I did sleep. I pulled myself together through constant life-threatening health issues, and participated in physical activities that I had no business attempting with a smile on my face (like running multiple marathons with no training) – while inside my body, my mind, and my spirit were dying a slow and agonizing death. Yet I still didn’t listen.

Why am I sharing all of this with you? Because I believe I could have spared my body a lot of pain and damage, my mind a lot of anxiety, if I had just learned to accept, or even embraced my “can’t” earlier in my health journey. I would have also spared my bride from a lot of worrying.

I want to share a few lessons I have learned along the way. I hope you take the time to read and reflect on them.

1). “Can’t” Is Not Weakness:

The biggest hurdle when it comes to dealing with “can’t” is intimately understanding on a heart-knowledge level that being unable to do certain things because of your illness does not mean you are weak, lazy, unintelligent, or unmotivated. This is where I was stuck for a long time. I had believed my whole life that if I couldn’t perform at peak levels, it must be my fault and that I just wasn’t trying hard enough. So, when my illness started to seriously affect my work quality in the career I had worked so hard to achieve, I compared myself to those around me, and told myself that I was just “too stupid” or “lazy” to do the job. At times I listened to the lies that I was worthless.

Hello Over-Achiever. I want to talk to you directly now. You burn-the-candle-at-both-ends doers. You know-you-can-conquer-the-world types. You did not choose your health issues. You didn’t work hard your whole life just to become a “lazy” and “unmotivated” on a whim. That’s not you and that’s not what is happening in your life. It’s not a matter of motivation, drive, desire, or ambition. It’s not a matter of not trying hard enough. It’s a matter of your body revolting against the true self of your mind and spirit. It’s a matter of your earthly vessel failing the real and eternal you that lives inside. The true and eternal you is still the same as it has always been: driven, motivated, intelligent, and strong. Once you accept this and understand the gulf between the two “yous,” you can take strides to get your body back on board so that a more collected, collective you can get back to truly living.

Accepting your “can’t” isn’t weakness; it’s actually strength. It means that you are strong enough to look your health challenge squarely in the face and get after the business of Overcoming. It means that you are brave enough to accept that your life right now must take an unexpected detour. It means that you are willing to admit your physical “can’t” so that you can open your mind and spirit to what you can and must do to regain your health. And the only way you can allow your focus to properly shift to healing is to first completely embrace your illness and your “can’t.”

2. “Can’t” Allows Healing:

Sadly, it took me several years to embrace this truth. I am encouraging you not to wait. Because if you don’t fully believe and fully accept that you are sick, you will keep running the rat race. But if you look deep in your heart, listen to your body, and know in truth that you are sick, then you can accept it. Embrace it.

I cannot stress this enough. Because until you wholly feel the weight of it, until you embrace it and believe it, you can’t get truly angry about what your illness is stealing from you. And until you get angry you cannot mentally, emotionally and spiritually prepare for the battle ahead of obtaining a full and accurate diagnosis, proper treatment, and hopefully better health. This is how coming to terms with your “can’t” sets you on the path to healing.

If you are in the early stages of your health journey, this next part may shock you. The medical system (at least in the United States) will not completely facilitate you regaining your health. Not at all. Unless you are exceptionally fortunate, your journey is not going to look like: get sick, see a doctor, get better. No, if you have a chronic or complex illness, generally speaking you need to prepare for battle. You need to arm yourself with knowledge and with the mental fortitude to be your own advocate. You need to prepare to fight for your life. You need to push for answers and drive the process. No one else will or can do it for you.

This is why embracing your “can’t” is so important. Because when you truly realize what you “can’t,” you get really, really angry at this invisible thief of life that is your illness. I don’t mean “bitter” angry, I mean “motivated and determined” angry. And you’re going to need that determination to drive the (sometimes grueling) battle that lies before you. And that drive to press forward in the battle is the only thing that will lead you to wellness.

It’s all you, Warrior! So get really angry at your “can’t” and resolve in your mind to do everything you humanly can to regain your health.

3. “Can’t” might be forever (But it’s not your identity): One of the more valuable pieces of advice I can share with you is that your “can’t” might be forever. That can be a difficult pill to swallow. But your “can’t “ does not need to become your identity. My life is much more than all the “limitations” I face on a daily basis. My life is full of hope, adventures and overcoming all the bumps in the road.

4. “Can’t” Makes Room for “Can”

Another critically important thing that coming to terms with your “can’t” does is that it makes room in your life for your “can.” Some of your “cans” may look something like:

1). I can make healthy, life-giving meals for myself to help my body heal.

2). I can research my illness for myself so that I have the knowledge to ask good questions at my appointments and to make educated treatment decisions.

3). I can maintain a positive attitude, despite how I feel.

4). I can make time for self-care activities that will help my body.

5). I can surround myself with people who encourage me in my health journey.

6). I can purposefully structure my life so that it supports wellness and healing.

7). Even though I couldn’t yesterday, today I can go for a short walk or bike ride.

8). This morning, I can rise early and sit peacefully to watch the sun rise

9). Right now, I can make positive choices to help with the symptoms I’m experiencing.

10). Don’t get hung up on committing to daily schedules of “cans” or expecting some type of minimum performance of “cans.” While it’s absolutely important to have bigger, more overarching “can” goals, embrace what you can do today and accept that tomorrow’s “cans” may look very different based on your health. Every day is a new opportunity to discover and put into practice the things you can do.

Here are some practical steps that can be used to work towards peace with your current “can’t:”

1. Pray

2. Journal

3. Reach out to family/friends

4. Reach out for professional help if needed

Coming to terms with your “can’t” may be difficult, but it’s so important and it opens the way for healing and wellness to come in time. You are unbelievably strong to live with your symptoms day in and day out and even stronger to accept and face such a challenge head on. Be encouraged that your “can’t” is just for right now and that nothing we face on this side of Heaven is forever. ~OC

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

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Comfort Zone

Today’s a new day! Are you planted in your comfort zone? It’s so easy to live in our comfort zones. So many people say they want God to move in their lives, but when God shakes things up, so many people decide to hide under their covers. Our comfort zones are so comfortable. So predictable. So convenient. But remember, nothing ever grows in the comfort zone. So today, make the choice to step out of your comfort zone. ~OC

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Experiencing Peace

Today’s a new day! Along this journey called life, we all deal with fear. Fear can hit us during what we thought would be a routine doctors appointment. Fear can hit us when test result comes back with more questions than answers. Fear can hit us when we watch the news or scroll through social media. We have all experienced fear in our lives.

Back in 2003, one of my doctors called me early one morning and shared he needed to see me right away. Then he made the comment “Oh and make sure you bring your wife.” A little fear hit me at that moment. Later when the doctor shared I had a tumor, the fear grew a little deeper. Fear, worry and anxiety. My wife and I experienced all those feelings sitting in that doctor’s office.

A few weeks later a biopsy revealed the tumor was the size of golfball and was cancerous. Once again, fear, worry and anxiety smacked me in the face. Things seemed overwhelming at that point.

Then something amazing happened. As I laid in ICU hooked up to several machines, God took away the fear, worry and anxiety. Those feelings were replaced by peace, calmness and even joy. Yes, joy. What changed?

God reminded me of the week long fast I had done a year earlier during a missions trip. He revealed the reason I had fasted was to prepare me for this very moment. Peace flooded my room and heart at that moment. In that moment, I completely turned my health situation over to Jesus and trusted Him to walk me through my unknown future.

Even though I had been filled with fear, anxiety and worry, Jesus was right there with me. He shared hope, love and peace even as I was overwhelmed with so many different emotions. God never abandoned me in my time of need.

During that moment, I still had to deal with life as a cancer patient. But that unknown did not overwhelm me anymore. Jesus reminded me that He was bigger than any health issue I would ever face. I am thankful, I did not know my future would be full of more health issues, test, multiple doctors appointments and hospital stays. No, at that moment I was just filled with peace. A peace that has never left me.

Here I am in 2024, after overcoming so much, but still dealing with so many health issues. Fear and worry try to overwhelm me at times, but I am still experiencing that same peace and joy I experienced in that ICU room so many years ago. Knowing that Jesus is still bigger than anything life throws at me. Still living life with a thankful heart. ~OC

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Keep Soaring

Today’s a new day! I write this as another hurricane comes through Florida. A good majority of the state is still recovering from another hurricane that hit us just a few weeks ago. These back-to-back hurricanes got me to thinking.

One thing about the storms of life is they do not last forever. They come and go. It is the size of our faith in God that determines how we will make it through each storm we face. Overcoming the storms of life can be overwhelming at times. When going through the storms of life, our faith and focus should be on God, the author and the finisher of our faith, not our problems. Sometimes that is easier said than done. It is during the storms of life when our faith is tested.

The only way to overcome the storm is to face and confront it. Overcomers cannot afford to play hide and seek with challenges, but instead must choose to face and deal with them head on. The challenges we are facing are just for a short time. We can never allow them to rob us of our destiny. We can never give up on life, on our faith, on our family/friends, and on the important things in life. We must face the storms of life and trust God for a brighter future. God did not bring us this far to leave us. He has a purpose for our lives. The word of God says- But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. ~Isaiah 43:31. I do not know about you, but that gives me hope.

While all the other birds fly away from the storm with fear, an eagle spreads its mighty wings and uses the current to soar to greater heights. An eagle doesn’t run for safety during the storms, but rather, it takes advantage of it to soar to some higher spot. Storms need somebody who will not give up no matter how hard it is. During the storms, take advantage to pray harder and worship like never before. There are times when the storms of life hit us so hard, when the storms threaten to sweep away all that we have. I am talking about times when the storms take away our loved ones, when the storms take away our possessions. Those are the very times we need to stand up and face the storms head on. God is bigger than any storm we will ever face in life. To overcome the storms of life, we have to have faith which is bigger than the storms. Our life is not over until God says it is.

If we are going to overcome the storms of life, we must let go of certain things surrounding our lives. We have to let go of some people who are holding us back. We have to let go of all of our fears and doubts. We have to let go of everything that is weighing us down and soar to a higher spot. Leave gossipers to gossip, leave haters to hate. Overcomers do not have time to confront everyone who speaks against them. Those living without purpose have limited vision, but overcomers see beyond the storms. Your storm will not last forever. Keep soaring! ~OC

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Joy!

Today’s a new day! Being chronically ill comes with a lot of ups and downs and a wide range of emotions. These emotions can be so strong and overwhelming at times. As you walk through the different stages of being chronically ill, you are faced with a lot of situations that you could never prepare for and those moments can make you feel like you’re on an emotional roller coaster. Physical health affects your mental, emotional and spiritual health more than people would think.

When you are chronically ill, your life becomes a vicious cycle of intense symptoms and flares. This can leave you feeling completely hopeless and lost at times. But even at moments when it feels impossible to find joy, it is possible, even on the darkest days. Some days you have to search a little harder for that joy but it is always there. Joy looks different to everyone. As a chronic illness warrior it is so important that you surround yourself with joy because it is easy to lose hope of experiencing pure joy again.

I find joy in many ways in my life and I really make an effort to make those things a part of my daily living. One of the main ways that I find joy/happiness is by leaning into my faith. My faith has allowed me to overcome a lot of tough moments in this journey. I also surround myself with the love and support of my family and the few friends who have decided to stay in the boat with me. A supportive group of people have the ability to turn my bad days into great days. I am so thankful for each of them because they not only provide peace/joy, they also give me so much hope. I also find joy and happiness in doing things I love such as: writing,listening to music and making memories with my bride.

The past month has been filled with more tough news regarding my health. Looking back on the past month, joy has still there even in the darkest days. Sometimes during hard times things become so overwhelming that we forget that even then we can still find joy in the little things. It is okay to have bad days but it is so important that everyday we challenge ourselves to stop and find happiness and joy. Joy always outweighs the bad and it is so important that we remind ourselves of that. Have a great day! ~OC

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A Big Question

Today’s a new day! What is keeping you from living the complete life? I know that is a big question, with many potential answers. But God designed each of us to live a complete whole life.

Here are a few things, I believe can help us live out the life God created for each of us.

A New Chapter. Too many of us are living in the past. We continue to relive past disappointments. Past failures. Or sometimes we live in past successes. We all know someone, who is eager to tell us about winning the 5th grade all county championship forty years ago. Don’t get me wrong, we should celebrate past successes. We should also learn from past mistakes. But we cannot live in the past. The great thing is, we have the opportunity to start a new chapter each morning. So close the chapter on your past and start writing a new one.

Worthy. Has anyone told you lately you are worthy? That you are important. No matter your past, God finds you worthy. He sent his Son down from heaven to die for us. I think that proves how worthy we are in God’s eyes.

Comfort Zone. I believe to live the whole life that God created for us, we have to step out of our comfort zones. We have to be willing to take some chances in life. God designed us to be creative. To be adventurous. We cannot truly experience life, if we choose to stay in our nice easy comfortable zones.

Labels. Stop wearing the labels the world puts on us. How many people continue to wear the labels put on them as a child? Not smart enough. Too short. Too weird. Too heavy. Too tall. Your from the wrong side of the tracks. So many people continue to wear these labels into adulthood. Today, I encourage you to take those labels off. Trash them. You are more than a label. You were created by a loving God to live an incredible life. To Dream. To Succeed. To Thrive.

Courage. It will take courage to start feeling Worthy. It will take courage to step out of your Comfort Zone. It will take courage to take off the Labels you have been wearing for years. But I promise you it will be worth it.

Today, I encourage each of us to think about these five points. To start living the incredible life, God has created us to live. Will you make a commitment to living wholeheartedly? ~OC

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Some Lessons Learned

Today’s a new day! As I have run this crazy beautiful health journey for the past twenty-two years, I am often asked about the lessons I have learned along the journey. So here are just a few lessons learned along this crazy beautiful journey.

  1. Bring your pain to God don’t run from Him: When you run from God in seasons of challenge, all you’re left with is your own limited ability to cope with what you’re walking through. On the other hand, God invites us to draw near to him that we might experience his peace, healing, and closeness and this is what Scripture points us towards.

 “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” Psalm 34:18

When we bring our pain to God we recognize that there is a purpose and in time God who loves us unconditionally will reveal his divine purpose through it.

  1. Fill your life with God’s word and God’s people: How we respond to the trials of life is critical to how we process what’s happening and how healing will take place. If we treat physical sickness with the incorrect medication, not only will our sickness continue, but it could become worse.

That is why it’s so important to not fill our minds with wrong thoughts; like God is mad at me, God is not good, worse things are going to happen, etc. If we allow those negative thoughts in, we will struggle to experience the peace of God he promises to us in Scripture (Philippians 4:7).

But when we fill our life with God’s words and surround ourselves with people who speak hope and encouragement into our lives, our experience will be much healthier.

“How sweet your words taste to me; they are sweeter than honey.” Psalm 119:103

When we fill our minds with God’s Word, we are reminding ourselves of who our God is, what he’s like, and we replace the lies of the enemy with the truth of God.

  1. Don’t be filled with worry, overflow with worship: Something powerful happens when we actively choose to worship through our suffering. We are not denying reality, we are simply redirecting our posture from one of worry to one of worship.

Worship changes our perspective. Worship speaks about where our confidence and hope lives. Worship redirects our thinking. Worship places the results in God’s hands.

  1. Believe that God will turn your sorrow into great joy: One of the great challenges of our faith is realizing that God can use our pain for our good. Meaning that our biggest sorrows can result in our greatest joy. When you think about Jesus’ greatest sorrow – suffering the shame, punishment, and death for our sin, the result was great joy – the redemption of humanity and the opportunity for a relationship with the living God.

When I reflect on my long health journey, which has been filled with a lot of pain, suffering and loss, I am thankful I pressed into God’s presence and trusted his plan for my life. I have watched him use my health journey to strengthen and encourage others which has resulted in my own comfort and joy through this crazy beautiful health journey.

As you walk through your own suffering today or in the days to come, I pray you will hold on to these powerful promises from God:

“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.” John 14:27

“And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:20

As I continue to run this health battle, I am humbled that Jesus willingly suffered the greatest pain and death because He knew the end of the story and so do we. So keep leaning into the promises of God. ~OC

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