Tag: Thriving

You Can’t Be That Sick

Today’s a new day! As I have walked through this crazy beautiful health journey, I have always tried to help educate people about what life is like for people dealing with long term chronic illness. Here is a tip for every well meaning person who uses the following statement, “But you don’t look sick”

“You went out for lunch yesterday, you can’t be in that much pain”

“I saw some photos of you on Facebook, looked like you were having a good time. You can’t be that sick”

“I see you went to an event , had friends over or went on vacation. You must be feeling better.” No, it means I am trying to live my life and not be defined by my illness.

So many health issues are called invisible illnesses for a reason.

Whether it’s a mental or physical illness, if it’s not that obvious on the outside then there are always people who will try to diminish what you’re going through.

Because it’s not like you can laugh at a joke when you have a broken bone or anything and it’s not like you can tell people that a bruise doesn’t hurt when it actually does.

It’s called putting on a brave face, not just because you want people to think you’re okay but because sometimes it’s hard to talk about. Sometimes people just don’t understand and because flippant and hurtful comments sometimes make you feel like you have to conceal even the worst of days.

I’ve been around groups of people, trying to laugh and joke and act normal while going through severe pain from the multiple life threatening issues that are slowly killing my body on a daily basis. (not even gonna sugar-coat it) and enduring the lovely overwhelming fatigue that comes with it.

I do not wear my illnesses on my face everyday of my life because they don’t define me as a person and I shouldn’t have to justify being sick to anyone.

More importantly, if having a chronic illness means I am not allowed to smile, laugh or have fun once in a while then what is the point of struggling through the tough days? What is the point of living if I cannot enjoy my life despite being sick.

Just because I “do not look sick” doesn’t automatically mean I am okay.

So please for the love of all that’s good in the world, stop telling people with visible or invisible illnesses that “you don’t look that sick”. Thank you for taking the time to read this public service announcement. ~OC

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Jesus and Power

Today’s a new day! Have you ever thought about or asked the question “Why didn’t Jesus ever use his power for personal gain?” I mean you look around today and sadly there are many examples of people using their power for personal gain.

Think about it. Jesus is stronger than the Strongest Person on Earth. He has more ups than Michael Jordan. Jesus is faster than Usain Bolt. He would dominate March Madness. Jesus had the ultimate power. There was simply nothing He could not do if He wanted to.

Could Jesus have used His power?

When I first started my relationship with Jesus many, many years ago, I often wondered why He did not use His power more. I mean, I knew He worked miracles. He walked on water, turned water into wine, and even raised Lazarus from the dead.

It’s not like He could not use his power at all. Clearly, God did not tell Jesus to hide His power. So if that is the case, why didn’t he use it more often? As a child, I could think of so many different ways He could have used it.

As a child, I thought Jesus could have used His power to defeat the playground bully. He could have won every sporting event he ever entered. Oh, the imagination of a child.

As an adult, Jesus did not have to be a simple carpenter. He could have been the most successful business person ever. Jesus could have risen to the top of the political structure of the time. He could have even defeated the Roman army single-handedly and taken over the world. But He chose not to.

As a child with a lively imagination, I could come up with endless ways Jesus could have used His power. As a child, I used to ask why didn’t Jesus use His power to escape the torture of the cross?

Jesus had an eternal perspective.

Now, many decades into my walk with Jesus, I can see how silly my questions were. What seemed so elusive at the time is an answer that is all too obvious to me now.

You see, Jesus had an eternal perspective. He came from heaven to earth for only thirty-three years and with a very specific purpose. Jesus knew before He came that He would return to heaven. He knew that anything material He gained on earth would be left behind upon His return to His throne.

Jesus Purpose Was Bigger

Jesus never used His power to win fights or contests because those things did not align with His purpose. He never spent time seeking wealth, success and power because He knew all those things were fleeting. Jesus knew it was worthless in eternity and promised little comfort during His time on earth.

Jesus always avoided political and military entanglements because His perspective was even bigger than those around him could imagine. And most of all, He submitted to the cross because the lives of those He would save as a result were infinitely more valuable than the value of His additional time on earth.

I Continue To Be Humbled

When I reflect on my life and look at all the time I sought after things that truly didn’t matter, at the expense of eternal gain, I just shake my head. Maybe you are different, but I am almost embarrassed to put these thoughts out here on the blog…and would not, except for the hope that someone else will gain from my weakness and transparency.

We should be exchanging what this short-term world has to offer for the eternal reward that Jesus offers us. We should be sacrificing our comfort today for the promise of our future in heaven.

So many of you are doing this very thing. You are actually being the hands and feet of Jesus. At the same time, others are silently thinking about how they could be more committed.

It’s Never Too Late, The Time Is Now

I want to encourage everyone to never quit. Do not give up simply because you feel you have failed in one area or another (or in multiple areas). Today, take the time to ask Jesus for renewed strength and wisdom to trust Him to lead you. Jesus will never leave you or forsake you. Keep leaning into all that He has for your life. ~OC

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Today’s A New Day!

Today’s a new day! As I have run this crazy beautiful health journey for the last 23 years, I make a daily decision that helps me through each day. I believe it can make a difference in your life. And it’s free! Here it is… Today choose to be positive. Today choose to surround yourself with positive people. Today choose to look at the positives instead of dwelling on negatives. Today choose to live a positive life, even when the world is throwing a major storm your way. That does not mean you ignore those storms, but you choose to take a different perspective in dealing with those storms. I believe by choosing to be positive and surround yourself with positive people, you improve your quality of life.

I pray your day is filled with amazing moments and God’s blessings. Have a great day!~OC

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Our Calling Card

Today’s a new day! I believe love is our calling card.

Some may be surprised or shocked by this statement, but look around at some portions of the Church today.  You don’t have to go far on the internet to see pastors preaching with such anger and hatred, what comes across is ugly and lacking in power.  There are others who are doctrinally sound but so intellectually focused that the Gospel that they preach is cold, detached and forbidding.  They have the truth of the Bible but without the love of God, it is creating a really confusing picture. Some have lost sight of God’s love so they have completely lost the message brought to us by Jesus Himself.  For God so loved the world He sent His one and only Son.

God is love. Jesus is God and therefore is love. He was sent into this world as a common man because God deeply loved the world. Jesus said that the greatest commandments are to love God and love our neighbors. Jesus said that the world will know us as disciples by our love. Not by our biblical knowledge which is important, but love is essential to who God is and who we’re supposed to be as Believers. Without love, Christianity is nothing. We can never lose sight of love and still live the life that Jesus has for us in Him. God is love. A life without love is a life without God prominently in it.

So if you have gotten so far down a path that looks like Christianity but is not filled with love, you must turn around. Make that turn this very moment. If we are working really hard for the church but are doing it in anger and resentment, turn around this very minute. If we are so busy with serving or complaining that we have no time to love the people we are supposed to be serving…just stop. Treat this moment like a red light or stop sign. It profits us nothing and creates a jarring and unpleasing sound if we are trying to live the Christian life without love. We should only be serving and loving others when we are able to say for certain that it is the love of Jesus compelling us and the love of the Holy Spirit working through us. Of course we will all have moments where it is hard to love and serve others. Face it, we are all human and will make mistakes along the journey. So please do not beat yourself up. Just stop and seek God. Allow Him to redirect you to get back on the path He has laid out for you.

No matter what it looks like to our eyes, if we do not have love we are nothing. Why? Because if there is no love then Jesus is not with us.  He is love and brings love wherever He goes. I hope and pray we all want to do something for the Body of Christ. Right? So make the choice to love and love generously. And being generous, doesn’t always mean our finances. Loving generously includes are time, talents and gifts.

Let the following words sink in:

And if I were to have the gift of prophecy with a profound understanding of God’s hidden secrets, and if I possessed unending supernatural knowledge, and if I had the greatest gift of faith that could move mountains, but have never learned to love, then I am nothing. And if I were to be so generous as to give away everything I owned to feed the poor, and to offer my body to be burned as a martyr, without the pure motive of love, I would gain nothing of value. ~1 Corinthians 13:2-3

So today, make the choice to love. It could be life changing for you and someone around you. ~OC

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Life With Chronic Illness

Today’s a new day! What do you do when you don’t get better?”

I became chronically sick twenty-three years ago, after being diagnosed with several types of crippling arthritis. It would be a year later after taking many experimental medications, that I was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. Then over the years, I would be be diagnosed with the following: Young Onset Parkinson’s, Myasthenia Gravis, Gastroparesis, Covid Long-Hauler, Complex Headaches, and recently Early Onset Dementia. Oh, and a stroke several years ago. It truly has been a crazy beautiful health journey.

I became a Christian when I was ten years old. I will be the first to admit, I did not always live the Christian life in my early teenage years. When I first became ill, some people in the Christian community began to weaponize their faith against me. They would say that I wasn’t faithful enough, or that I must have some type of unresolved sin in my life. Sadly all these years later, I still have some Christians screaming that in my ear on a weekly basis. At times over the years, I felt judged and disliked by many in the Christian community. That is never how Christianity, or any faith, should be. For me, it wasn’t just what conversations were being had—but also how.

The sad part is that the people who wanted me to not lose faith tried to make it harder to connect with God and other Christians. Some people over the years have made the excuses, “Well they mean well.” I truly do not believe that. I believe it actually shows their true heart. I am thankful that during this crazy beautiful health journey, God has surrounded me with some amazing people who have helped me through this difficult season. I am also thankful I have never lost my faith during this journey.

As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, my goal is to not allow those negative voices to have any influence on my life. I also decided early on in my health journey to help others walking through their own health journey.

I share all this because I know that I’m not alone, and I want others to know that they aren’t either. When you’re feeling attacked, beaten up, remember that God loves and is with you. I am sorry if anyone has made you feel like that isn’t the case. What people believe is their choice, but no one has the right to weaponize their faith. That sort of human hurt harms those in the disabled/chronically ill community that may be struggling with their faith.

In Isaiah 54:10 we read, “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,’ says the LORD, who has compassion on you.” Being chronically ill can very much feel as if everything is being shaken up and changed—at least that’s how I have felt at times over the years.

I no longer know what each day will feel like, physically, let alone have a clue about what I may be able to do in the future. But God’s love doesn’t change when we are in tough situations (or any situation.) He is still with us. He knows the truth of our situation and still loves us.

Some passages that resonated with me, and may be appreciated by those reading this post, are those about us being fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139: 13- 14), Psalm 86-15, and Ephesians 1:5-6. That is about YOU. You are loved beyond words. Think about John 3:16. That’s not just for the able bodied and minded, it’s for ALL of us.

If you can relate to anything I have written, the following are a few things that have helped me. Just remember this journey is different for everyone.

*Don’t bottle things up. I encourage everyone to find a trusted friend, pastor, counselor or support group to share your feelings with. It may be difficult at first, but I promise you’ll be glad you did.

*Take this current season of life slowly. Remember, life is a marathon not a sprint.

*Do not give up on the Christian community or the Church based on some misguided people. Remember, there are no perfect people or churches.

*Find out what works for you in your journey with health issues and your walk with God. One size doesn’t fit us all.

*Spend time in the Bible and listening to worship music. Both have helped bring peace and clarity to my life during my health journey.

* Remember, sometimes God does not give us quick answers to our prayer request. I encourage you to embrace the lessons God is trying to teach you during this difficult season. All of us whether healthy or chronically ill have a different journey. If chronic illness is currently part of journey, you are just as worthy as anyone else. Please embrace that truth today.

I hope and pray this post will encourage and challenge everyone who has taken the time to read it. Thank you! ~OC

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Run Your Race!

Today’s a new day! Here is another “Lost Writings of OC.” This was written in 2018.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. ~Hebrews‬ ‭12‬:‭1‬-‭3‬ ‭

My feet hit the ground in a slow, steady rhythm. I am not fast. But I like how stress rolls off me along with the sweat from my forehead, the way my favorite songs match the beat of my heart and the satisfaction of discovering I am capable of more than I first thought.

The sky is a beautiful blue, filled with sunshine and I am content…until I see another runner out of the corner of my eye with a smooth, speedy stride I can hardly fathom. And suddenly I feel like I am not doing anything right. Have you ever experienced those feelings?

You love the social media post or blog post you wrote until you see someone else’s got more likes for their post.

You think your life is just fine until everyone flocks around the new, cool kid in town.

We can so quickly shift from focusing on “the race marked out for us” (Hebrews 11:1) to comparing ourselves with someone else. And as every runner knows, where your eyes go your feet (and heart and life) will follow.

The cure to comparing is considering. We’re to fix our eyes on Jesus and “consider” all He went through for us (Hebrews 12:3). In other words, if we’re going to focus on a path besides our own then we’re to think about the one that led to the cross. Because that changes everything.

Instead of what we don’t have, it reminds us of all we have been given.

Instead of how we do not measure up, it reminds us of the limitless grace that’s ours.

Instead of self-pity, it gives us a reason to lift our hands and hearts in praise and worship.

So today, make the choice to run the race designed just for you. Embrace it and boldly live it out. ~OC

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Write Your Book!

Today’s a new day! Since I have had the honor of writing two books, people often seek my advice about writing a book. Well here’s my advice.

Writing has been a major part of my crazy beautiful health journey. From writing for my eyes only, to sharing with a few friends, to starting a blog and finally writing books and having then published. Writing has been an amazing experiences part of my life.

Over the past two decades, the journey and advice for becoming an author have changed a little. Back in the day, you needed to find an agent and find a big publishing company to get your book out there. Twenty plus years later, while having an agent and publishing deals can still be important, it is not the only path to the call God put on your heart. 

If you are considering writing a book and having it published, I would love to encourage you to take your next steps toward your dream. I pray this post brings encouragement to all writers to finally pursue their God-given dream of becoming a published author. 

1. Write the Book You Want to Read:

My first piece of encouragement may seem fairly obvious, but I want to encourage you to write a book you would be excited to read yourself. If you’re a writer, you are probably a reader too. You know just as well as I do that there are books that get the point across, that you connect with, have your emotions moved, learn from, grow from and want to share with a friend or loved one. 

Is there a topic that you are passionate about that you feel has been brushed aside? Do you have a special and unique story that God is working out in you that you feel confident enough to share with the world even if you are still in that season of life? I am a 50 plus year-old, married man with a heart focused on God and hopeful for what He continues to have in store for me. There have been books that have encouraged me over the years and then books I just could not get into.

People identify with struggles. The main goal of my blog, The Blessed Overcomer, is to encourage others as they walk through this journey called life. People that are in seasons of waiting, that are grateful for day-to-day blessings and staying hopeful for the future. If you feel prompted by God to share your story but feel your struggle isn’t “finished” yet, rely on Him to be your book’s happily-ever-after ending, and you can’t go wrong.

2. Don’t Compare Your Platform to Others’:

There are so many wonderful authors and writers out there and, if you went digging long enough, I am sure you would find someone else in a similar life season as you. I want to encourage you to keep writing, keep sharing your stories, and staying true to yourself. Every time a twinge of comparison starts to creep up, I remind myself of Psalm 139:14, which states that I am “… fearfully and wonderfully made….” You have a unique voice, platform, and group of friends and supporters, so be proud of that!  

While I don’t have a “huge” following if you compared me to a seasoned author with a big publishing deal, I still am very honored and proud of the hundreds and now thousands of people who have chosen to follow along, receive my text, and interact with my social media posts over the years.

Think of it this way: You may not feel like 500 followers are a lot on Instagram, but if 500 people all decided to come to your house tomorrow…it would be a big deal! 

Engage with people choosing to receive your updates and posts on their social feeds. You know how many people and organizations are vying for our attention every second we are on the internet, so don’t take it for granted when a kind person comments or likes something you have posted. Believe me, when you write your book, those people are going to be your biggest cheerleaders.

3. It’s Never Too Late:

If you’re reading this post and feel that it’s just too late for you to write a book, let me stop you right now from going down that negative mindset. I promise you, especially in this age of technology, becoming an author has never been more doable. I did not have my first book published until I was in my 50’s. And while I could have tried to write and have it published earlier, I truly believe in God’s perfect plan and timing, so when I felt Him prompting me to begin writing my book in January 2018, I said “yes!”

Looking back on it now, it was the perfect time because it was the season God wanted my story to be shared with the world. It was the perfect moment to allow all of my emotions, feelings and life experiences to be shared in writing.

4. Write for the One:

I hope that my experience has a published author has encouraged you to take the step to writing your story and having it published. I am so excited that you are considering sharing a part of your heart for the world to read. It’s not easy being vulnerable and sharing our hearts, experiences, and personal stories with others. You may feel anxious about all of the steps it takes to write that book and have it published, I want to encourage you to not allow any obstacles to keep you from sharing your story. To realizing your dream of becoming a published author.

When we write, we are only one part of the equation. I believe we are called to be faithful to use our gifts while shining our focus on God’s love. Don’t forget that God is all-powerful and will take our offering and multiply it as He sees fit. He will put your story, your book in the right hands at the right time. 

Write for the one person who may read your book when they are close to giving up. To quote a small part of one of my past blog post, “Have you ever thought that your life could be helping to save someone else’s in how you live it?” Your book may be an integral piece of the big puzzle that God uses to help someone walking through a tough season of life. So do not worry about the rankings, the sales, and the followers. Just remember the one person that needs to hear what you have to say and the One we owe everything to, and it will be all worth it. So go write that book!

If you need any help, advice or encouragement, please do not hesitate to reach out to me. It would be my honor to help you realize your dream. ~OC

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Happiness Giver

Today’s a new day! I believe we all want our lives to be focused on things that matter. Deep down we all understand that constantly pursuing our own happiness leaves us with little fulfillment in life. And we also know that when we help others, we experience happiness in a real way. Serving others just makes us feel good.

We thrive in community and I believe part of our happiness is directly related to the strength of our relationships. That’s why serving others and giving with joy is one of the secrets of experiencing true happiness in this life.

At the end of our lives do we really want to be known for our book collection (I really enjoy books) or how great we were at sports or the arts? No, I think we will want to be remembered for how we served others and for being a happiness giver.

That’s why now is the time to break through our fears and think about how we can use our gifts, talents and skills to help serve others in our communities and beyond. ~OC

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Dear Dementia,

Today’s a new day! As most of you know, I was diagnosed with Young Onset Dementia caused by Parkinson’s last September (2024). As I have walked through the past few months, I have thought about this diagnosis and what it means for my future. So I thought I would write a letter to dementia. Hopefully it makes sense.

Dear Dementia, I often wonder if you were a person, what would I say to you? So often dementia tries to fill me with anger, sadness and frustration. But thankfully, I am able to fight off those emotions most days. But some days all those emotions get the best of me.

I think I’ll start with I am a little frustrated with you dementia. I dislike that you’ve made sharing my thoughts and having conversations a little tougher these days. I am a little frustrated that being social has become a bit more difficult for me. Since I am in the early stages of dementia, I have learned a few tricks to hide my struggles from people. But I cannot hide those struggles from myself and that makes me frustrated at times.

I am frustrated that you try and fill my days with grief, loneliness and sadness. I am saddened that some friends find it too difficult to call or visit because they do not know what to say. I am frustrated that you’re trying to take away my memories too, with you being all consuming; you sometimes make it hard to remember how things were before you.

But dementia despite all the frustration sadness and grief, I still choose to live with hope and embrace every moment of life. My bride and I still talk about future plans and trips. We will not allow you to become our identity. We celebrate those days I feel like my old self. Almost like the fog has been lifted. I embrace those days because they will not always be around. I embrace simple moments with family and friends a little more these days. I am thankful for those friends who still choose to treat me like me. Please keep doing that. Even on those days, I might not totally seem like the old me.

I am thankful that God continues to walk this journey with me. He is bigger than dementia and all the other health issues trying to take me out. They may get the best of me some days, but they will not get the victory. No, that belongs to God and I will continue to hold onto that truth.

Dear Dementia, in some ways you have taught me the true value of unconditional love, and I will use that to defeat you. I will never give up on loving my life, loving those in my life and never ever give up on beating you. You’ve brought pain and suffering to so many people’s lives, snuck in and attacked the most vulnerable. But by working with medical researchers and families affected by your cruel actions we will learn new ways to defeat you. One day I will be part of ending you, as you will never be able to take away the unconditional love that fills me up and guides me along this crazy beautiful health journey. ~OC

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My Why

Good Morning! Here is another “Lost Writings from OC.” This was written in 2020.

Today’s a new day! Writing has been part of my crazy beautiful health journey. Writing has allowed me to see life in a different way and experience healing in many parts of my life. Writing has allowed me to experience the following:

God has put me on this earth to love and serve others. To encourage others. To hopefully inspire people to think about their own life journey.

God created me to truly experience life. To embrace the good…and bad moments of this journey. I am here to learn. Just a little advice, we should never stop learning.

I am here to overcome my physical limitations. I am here to transform inspiration into action.

I believe in living a peaceful life. Peace within myself. Peace with those I have disagreements with.

I no longer expect or demand to be understood. I understand myself. Most importantly, God understands me and still chooses to love me.

I am not alone when I connect with God and the amazing people He has put in my life. Those relationships fuel me.

I ache and grieve alongside the pain and suffering of others. I empathize with those who suffer.

I seek to overcome suffering by finding its meaning, purpose and lessons.

I no longer force my beliefs on others. I choose to show respect to those with different views, opinions and beliefs.

I choose not to be selfish. I love sharing and helping others. Serving others helps me experience God’s love in a meaningful and real way.

I choose to let God write my story, even though there are times I want to steal the pen.

I choose to be awake. To be present. I am called. I feel God’s presence within me. I can truly be me because He lives in me. ~OC

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