Tag: Trials

My Life With Dementia

Today’s a new day! As I continue to walk through this crazy beautiful health journey, I have always wanted to be upfront and honest when sharing my journey with you. So this morning, I want to share a post I have been working on for several weeks. It’s my life with dementia. I apologize in advance for the long post.

When I was diagnosed with young onset dementia last year, part of me thought there has to be a mistake, but it was also a relief to have some answers on why my life seemed a little out of focus. But it was still hard to hear “you have dementia.” Like so many people diagnosed with young-onset dementia, I was still planning a future with my bride. How was dementia showing up in my 50’s?

But here I am, almost a year later.

What I have learned is a dementia diagnosis isn’t the end of life. It just means life looks a little different.

Of course my life has looked a little different for the last twenty-three years dealing with multiple health issues. But over the last two decades, my faith and life experiences have taught me it’s possible to live a fulfilling, purposeful, and even joyful life even while dealing with the uncertainty of declining health. A diagnosis of dementia was not going to change that. At least I hope and pray that will be the case.

So as I walk out this journey called dementia, I wanted to share a few things that are working for me. This is not a neat how to live with dementia list, because dementia is not an easy follow these instructions and everything will be okay disease. No, dementia is a unpredictable roller coaster ride. Every day brings new challenges, but also new opportunities.

My hope and prayer is that this blog post will help create conversations. If you’re living with dementia, or supporting someone who is, I hope these tools help you live a full life regardless of the diagnosis.

My Dementia Toolbox:

I choose to live each day with Hope and Purpose.

I choose to live a life full of new adventures. Never stop making memories with family and friends.

I choose to maintain my independence as long as possible.

I choose to continue connecting with family and friends.

I choose to adapt to the changes dementia brings and never give up.

I choose to hold onto my identity and what makes me “me.”

I choose to keep learning new things each day.

I choose to live out my life and faith.

I choose not to avoid the declines that dementia brings, but to make the most out of every day and refuse to let dementia silence me.

Finally, living with dementia is not an easy journey. There are moments of loss and frustration, but there are also unexpected discoveries, laughs, and the good will of family and friends. ~OC

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Doorway

Today’s a new day! It was through the doorway of suffering that Jesus opened the way for us to walk through suffering with supernatural joy, peace, and hope. ~OC

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Bearers of the Mat

Today’s a new day!

“And when he returned to Capernaum after some days, it was reported that he was at a home. And many were gathered together, so that there was no more room, not even at the door. And he was preaching the word to them. And they came, bringing to him a paralytic carried by four men. And when they could not get near him because of the crowd, they removed the roof above him, and when they had made an opening, they let down the bed on which the paralytic lay.” ~Mark 2:1-4

I have always loved this story. It truly demonstrates the love of friends and our need for solid friendships. The four men in Mark 2, went beyond normal friendship and became “Bearers of the Mat.”

These four friends saw their friend needed a miracle in his life. They heard Jesus was in the area, so they decided to pick up their friend’s mat and get him to the Great Physician. We have no idea how far these four men had to walk carrying their friend, just to get to Jesus. No doubt they were exhausted by the time they reached the door of the house where Jesus was. There they found a new obstacle. The house where Jesus was speaking was beyond packed. But these four men persevered. Their friend needed a miracle and they were determined to get him to Jesus. Even if it meant carrying their friend to the roof and cutting a hole into the roof, so they could lower their friend into the room where Jesus was speaking. Can you imagine what a sight that must have been? What an amazing moment it must have been when after all that hard work, these four friends watched in awe as their friend was completely healed by Jesus. What a day of celebration that must have been.

Every time I read the story in Mark 2, two questions come to mind:

1). Do I have friends like these four men?

2). Am I a friend like these four men?

I pray we will all take the time to check our hearts as we reflect on these two questions. I truly believe Jesus wants each of us to serve one another willingly and wholeheartedly. Let’s become “Bearers of the Mat” ~OC

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Breakthrough

Good morning! As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey the last twenty-three years, I have had many moments where I needed a breakthrough from God. As we walk into a new week filled with new challenges, I want to share some things I have done when I needed a breakthrough at different moments in my life.

Pray: This may seem obvious, but sometimes we get so caught up in the roller coaster of life we forget to pray.

But prayer should never be our last resort. It should be the first thing we do when facing challenges in life. We also need to call on some trusted friends to pray on our behalf.

“I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope.” ~Psalm 130:5

Fast: When coupled with prayer, fasting is a powerful tool to use when you need a breakthrough. And fasting doesn’t mean you have to give up food. A fast is about sacrificing something, so you can clearly hear from God. He may asked you to give up social media, a hobby or tv. Some things do not break with just prayer alone. When you need a breakthrough, fasting is crucial to seeing it come to pass.

“So we fasted and implored our God for this, and he listened to our entreaty.” ~Ezra 8:23

Build Your Faith: I’m just going to be straight up with you: Every breakthrough that I have personally experienced came from leaning into the promises of God. Thankfully, He is so gracious that He has not left us to figure out how to grow in our faith on our own.

“So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.” ~Romans 10:17

Be Patient and Consistent: As I share this last point, I must warn you that breakthroughs can take time. The breakthrough you need may not come the first time you pray – or the hundredth. It may take weeks or even years. We cannot control the time, but we know that God can. He is always faithful. Our part is to stay consistent. So keep on praying. Keep on fasting. Keep on listening to the word. Keep believing in God. Your day of breakthrough will happen in God’s perfect timing for you.

If you’re waiting for your breakthrough the best thing you can do is remember that it will come at the perfect time. So press in to God and be patient. Your Breakthrough is coming! ~OC

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Temporary Privilege

Today’s a new day! Spoiler Alert: Facing struggles in our Christian walk is normal. In 1 Peter 4:12 we read the following, “Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.”

Throughout the Bible, we read story after story of Christians facing tough times and struggling. But we also read, that those struggles produced growth and many invaluable lessons were learned. As we walk through the tough times in life, it’s our choice how we respond to those challenges. Our struggles shape us. God wants to give us more than ease and comfort in life. He desires that we become more like Him. In order for that to happen, we must walk through seasons of suffering.

As I continue to walk through this very short journey called life, I have come to realize that this is the only time I will have the opportunity to glorify God in the midst of my struggles.

Here are a few questions God has put on my heart over the years, as I have walked my crazy beautiful health journey:

*Do I look at my current health struggles as a privilege and opportunity to grow and possibly help someone else walking through their own struggles?

*As I face trials and hardships, do I look at them as opportunities to honor God? To actually live by faith and not by sight. To truly be His hands and feet.

The pain I suffer as I deal with my current health issues is not fun, but through it all I am excited to hopefully honor God during this journey. Over the years, I have learned to count it a privilege to struggle well.

So today, as you reflect on this post and more importantly on your own life, do you consider the struggles you face in your Christian walk as a temporary privilege? ~OC

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Our Scars Tell A Story

Today’s a new day! As you have walked through this journey called life, you have experienced storms and trials that have left some scars. As I have traveled through this crazy beautiful health journey, I have collected my fair share of scars. We all have scars. Some are visible and some are invisible to the public eye. Scars can be painful and most of the time we choose to hide them from the world. But the last few days, this question has kept coming to my mind, “How does God view my scars and how can He use them?”

When I look at the multiple scars across my body, I can recall the day they became part of my story. As I shared earlier, I have collected my fair share of scars over the years. But I believe our scars, whether physical or caused by deep trauma tell the story of of our struggles and how God has helped us overcome those scars.

As I look at the scars that dot my body, I truly believe God has great purpose for each one. I think our scars are meant to make us stronger. Each one has a story and a lesson behind it. I believe our scars are beautiful to God.

Our scars should be a reminder of what Jesus went through for each of us on the cross. And remember when we get to heaven, Jesus will be the only one who still has his battle scars. The scars Jesus suffered should be a constant reminder to us of His great sacrifice and love for us.

No matter how deep the scars whether visible or not, God loves us and can use our scars and our pain to help someone else dealing with their own painful wounds.

As we continue to walkout this journey called life, remember our scars are beautiful to God because He loves us more than we could ever imagine and He desires that we share His love and our scar filled stories with others. ~OC

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Never Give Up

Today’s a new day! I think most people do not like to be uncomfortable. Most people do not like the hard moments in life. Most people do not like to be burdened or inconvenienced. Yet, in the tough moments in life, God never calls us to give up. Instead, He calls us to keep on pushing and trusting Him, even in the most difficult moments.

As a former marathon runner and someone who has been walking through a crazy beautiful health journey for over twenty years, I am used to being uncomfortable. I am used to the hard moments in life.

As I have walked through the tough moments in life, here are a few lessons I have learned:

Never give up on your prayers.

Never give up on the people God has placed in your life.

Never give up on your dreams.

Never give up on yourself.

Never give up when you face hard times or failures.

Most importantly, never give up on God.

The beautiful thing about God and his amazing grace is that He never gives up on us. He calls us back even when we decide to stray away and do things on our own. God is always there waiting for us with open arms. Remember, every battle we will ever face was defeated on the cross when Jesus gave his life for us.

I am not sure what type of season you’re walking through at this moment. Maybe you have been praying the same prayers over and over for years, but they seem like they will never be answered. Don’t give up.

I want to encourage you to never limit God and put him in a nicely decorated box. Allow Him to work through you and never give in to those temptations to give up.

Looking back on all of my marathons, I am so glad I completed each of my races and never gave into the temptation to quit. Based on my health, those marathons were never easy on my body, but each taught me about overcoming and to never give up.

I believe our faith and life journey is like a marathon, it’s not promised to be easy, it’s going to be hard and full of twist and turns, but our finish line and reward in eternity is far greater than anything we could ever imagine.

So today, keep pushing, keep fighting and never give up. ~OC

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” ~2 Timothy 4:7

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Dear Men of God,

Today’s a new day! My apologies to all the ladies today. The following post is geared towards men and the importance of men having solid friendships with other men.

Today, I write from a position of painful experiences. Today, I believe God is calling me to be transparent as I share the following message.

I have tried for years to be involved in Christian men’s groups. Unfortunately, most have never produced much fruit. Several have caused pain, loss and mistrust. Even with that said, I am still open to being part of a Christian men’s group. But not one that is more concerned about a man’s social status in society than they are about the man’s heart. Not easy to find. I definitely do not want to be part of any men’s group that preaches we need to be a man’s man in the likeness of John Wayne.

In a society that celebrates rugged individualism, Christian men are often left searching for and craving connection, but unsure how to or where to find it. Men, the Bible calls us to community. In Ecclesiastes 4:9, we read that “two are better than one.” Yet so many men are struggling to forge deep, meaningful friendships with other men. I am one of those men.

The consequences are real. Loneliness among men are at their highest rates in decades. Loneliness can lead men to make some poor choices, which can ultimately lead to brokenness.

I believe for men to be better husbands, fathers and friends, we need to be surrounded by not just mere acquaintances, but by brothers who sharpen each other “as iron sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17).

The Bible is full of scriptures that tell us that we are all created for relationships. Even men. In Genesis 2:18 we read, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” While often shared at wedding ceremonies, this verse actually speaks about our need for companionship. Jesus himself modeled friendship, calling his disciples “friends” (John 15:15).

For Christian men, friendships should not be a distraction from our faith but a cornerstone of it. Men, we need to be surrounded by other Christian men offering accountability and encouragement.

Yet men often pursue other gods—careers, social status, or some type of hobby before seeking out true friendships.

True friendship are a beautiful gift and I believe, an important part of living a life that honors God. In Proverbs 18:24, we read those life changing words “a friend who sticks closer than a brother,” a bond that mirrors Christ’s sacrificial love. Such friendships require intentionality and spending quality time together. And not being afraid to leave the shallow end of conversations and dive into deep, sometimes hard conversations. True brotherhood is also about laughing together and enjoying life.

Men of God, the stakes are high. Loneliness and brokenness are stealing our peace, our joy and our witness. But I believe true brotherhood, rooted in God’s love, can restore each of us. ~OC

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Created for Community

Today’s a new day! God created us for community. Being part of a community allows us to love and support others walking through this journey called life. Being part of a community allows us to celebrate moments of triumphs and hold friends a little closer when heartaches hits those in our community. Being part of a community makes life a bit easier. But we cannot be part of a community if we do not seek one out.

Spoiler Alert! We cannot do life alone. Being surrounded by a supportive community is healthy in so many different ways. I have a small, but solid group of friends I can confide in when I struggle. A group of friends I can celebrate with during the good times. A group of friends that check in with me on a regular basis. There is great comfort being surrounded by community. Seek one out. ~OC

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Testimony

Today’s a new day! As you’re walking through a season of trials, remember you’re not the only one. Life is filled with challenging moments. But remember, it’s those tough seasons in life that build you into the person God created you to be. Every test builds a testimony. ~OC

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