Find Those 3am Friendships

Today’s a new day! Life is full of wonderful and difficult moments. That is why it’s so important to surround yourself with people who will encourage and support you. Those who will step up in not only the good times, but more importantly those who step in during the toughest moments in life. Those moments when we find it difficult to breathe. We each deserve to have people who will walk alongside us to support us in every season of life. To help us become better people.

Each of us is worthy of deep and meaningful friendships. We have much to share with others as we walk through this journey called life. If you are in a place where you do not feel valued or supported, if you haven’t found your “3am friendships”, I pray you will spend some time seeking out those important relationships. Warning! You might have to step out of your comfort zone to find those life changing friendships. Do not neglect the opportunities God has placed before you to find those friendships. There will be moments in life when you may feel that no one understands you. There will also be moments when God sets you apart, in order to grow you and reveal something fresh in your life. But there will also be moments for you to dive into community and friendships. A time to find your “3am folks.” Do not miss those amazing opportunities. ~OC

Don’t Fall For The Lies

Today’s a new day! As a chronically ill Christian, the enemy often tries to sell me the following lie: “My illness and God’s goodness cannot coexist.”

Over the past twenty-two years, multiple life threatening health disease have been my “thorn.”  My body has been attacked on many fronts. Many times early on in my health battle, I remember trying to reconcile my suffering with God’s purpose.

As I pondered my place in God’s eyes, questions of doubt polluted my mind:

What did I do to deserve this illness?

If God actually loves me, why doesn’t he heal me?

How could a broken body fit into God’s plans?

By worldly standards, my value depended on what I could do, instead of what God already did.  For someone who has lived in and out of the hospital for the last two decades, a meaningful life might seem to be an unattainable dream.

Unrooted in God’s word, the presence of my health issues seemed to indicate an absence of His affection.

But friend, this thinking is simply unbiblical.  Let’s dispel this lie by replacing it with God’s truth and equip ourselves with biblical instruction for endurance.

Maybe you don’t struggle with a chronic illness, but we all struggle with chronic issues. Whether you’re dealing with multiple health issues, the scars of life that still plague your mind or the same addiction continues creeping into your life, God tells us that no trial can separate us from His Love. ~Romans 8:35

In fact, our trials might be the very tool God uses to strengthen our relationship with Him.  So, as we think about chronic illness, let’s redirect our thoughts from asking “what could I have done differently to prevent my health issues”, to instead asking, “God, how can you work through my current health issues?”

Two words come to mind when I consider how God can work through our challenges to refine our faith: Reliance and Glory.

1. RELIANCE – God can use our current life challenges to encourage us to rely more fully on Him.

For those struggling to understand why God allows hardship to ensue, the book of Job is a masterpiece written just for us. The Bible describes Job as a faithful man with many blessings.  To test whether Job will still praise God’s name even when his life crumbles, God allows the enemy to wreak havoc on Job’s life – striking his flesh and bones with sickness, infecting him with skin boils, and turning his family away (Job 1:4-9).  Job is not only chronically ill, but also chronically lonely, as his loved ones tell him to just give up and curse His Creator.

Let’s pause right here.  God allows the enemy to test Job.  Now, why would God do this? Among many reasons, God uses suffering as a tool to refine Job’s faith. God knows that it is in the valleys that we are encouraged to truly rely on Him.

Amid adversity, Job’s mind is a battlefield much like our own; his thoughts go between wanting God to leave Him alone and begging for God’s support.  In the end, through his wrestle with God, Job remains faithful that God’s promises are true. He trusts that God loves him in his struggles and is working all things together for good.

As we learn in Job, sometimes God allows for challenges, not to punish us, but to strengthen our relationship with Him.When storms arise, may we trust that God’s plans are purposeful.  This means that whether we are battling a seasonal cold or fighting for our lives after tragedy strikes, God’s loving hand is in everything.

2. HIS GLORY – The contrast of our weakness with His Power emphasizes our need for God.

In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul describes pleading with the Lord to remove a “thorn in his flesh” (2 Corinthians 12:7).  In my own life, my “thorn” represents my health battle.

Jesus addresses Paul’s request by equipping him with endurance and explaining that his struggle has a purpose.  Jesus answers, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My Power is perfected in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9).  In this story, Paul’s struggle serves as a reminder of his inherent inadequacy to our all-powerful God, ultimately pointing to his need for a Savior.

Though God denies Paul’s request for healing, He assures him that His grace will help him endure.  Paul is not blessed with healing, but instead, with a more valuable and versatile blessing: the ability to see God’s light in the darkness of his valley.  God doesn’t leave us to dwell in our struggles, He helps us endure.

God’s response gives hope to those whose prayers seemingly go unanswered.  Next time you ask God to remove your “thorn”, may you remember that a lack of an answer is not evidence of a distant God.  God always responds to our requests; His responses just might differ from what we planned.  No matter the response, if we trust God with our lives, we can be sure that He is working for our good and His glory (Romans 8:28).

As we learn from Paul’s interaction with God, some of our wounds will only heal once we go home to Heaven, but we can trust that our struggles are a part of a beautiful redemption story.

Let’s look at another example of how God can work through our pain to reveal His Power.  In John 9, Jesus is walking around town with His disciples when they spot a man who is blind from birth.  Jesus’ disciples ask him a question that might sound like one you’ve asked yourself before: “who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” (John 9:2).  Sound familiar? The disciples mistakenly assume that this man’s disability is due to his personal sin.

Jesus corrects the disciples, responding, “neither this man nor his parents sinned…This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him” (John 9:3).  With this declaration, Jesus dispels the lie that the only purpose for our trials is punishment, and He communicates that our trials can be used to display God’s power.

Jesus then heals the blind man, confirming his belief and establishing an eternal relationship.

Before his healing, we can’t be sure of how this man’s disability affected his self-esteem, but he might have believed some of the same lies that often ravage our minds.  When measuring himself against societal standards, he very well could have attributed his disability to a distant God.  However, when Jesus enters the scene, it becomes clear that this man’s disability was the very tool God utilized to strengthen his relationship with Him. 

As we reflect on these stories, the Word illuminates God’s heart for the chronically ill: God has a purpose for our pain, His love does not waver, and He will work all things together for good, even the messy parts of our lives.

God does not promise to remove our thorns, but He does promise to help us endure.  Whatever your thorn looks like, may you remember that God provides a peace that surpasses understanding (Philippians 4:6-7).

Throughout my battle with multiple health issues, medical mysteries, and shattered plans, one verse has sparked hope in my soul: “We do not give up. Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day” (2 Corinthians 4:12).

Friend, however deep your thorns dig, may you never give up. Keep overcoming and finish strong. ~OC

Our Health and Living

Today’s a new day! Long-term and terminal illnesses can be a scary road to navigate. It’s hard on one’s body, mind and soul. And everyone that cares for them. How will my body and mind handle today? That’s a question I ask myself on a daily basis. Chronic and terminal illnesses also raises many questions that many people shy away from unless they are faced with it directly. But if we’re listening, many lessons can be learned.

Health issues have a way of reminding people that time is a valuable, non-negotiable, and a non-renewable resource. With that said, how do we look at the bigger picture of life and find out what is truly important? 

Spend Time Focusing on Relationships:

We were not meant to do this life alone. God did not create us to be Lone Rangers. I know of no one who regrets time spent building meaningful relationships regardless of life’s struggles.

Take time to ask yourself the following question: Are you truly making time for your family and friends?

Trim That Fat:

I am not talking about dieting and exercise, but those are important parts of our lives.

No, I am referring to something that a lot of times we do not even notice. I am referring to our home and our lives. We all have a tendency to fill both with clutter and hang on to things we do not need. A life-changing diagnosis can become the catalyst for the housekeeping of our home and heart as we realize what is truly important in our lives. It is also a good time to reflect on our faith.

 “Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.” ~Hebrews 12:1-2

Speak your Heart Now:

It is good for all of us to review and consider our relationships. Because we all know relationships can be messy at times. If we love people, why not let them know how much they mean to us. Now! Why wait until it’s too late? If we have hurt someone or offended them in some way, why not seek their forgiveness and do what we can to make it right.

Who are the most important people in your life? Take a moment to think about that. Maybe even say their names out loud or write them down. Then ask yourself this question: Have I honestly shared what each of those individuals truly mean to me?

“A heart at peace gives rest to the body.”   Proverbs 14:30

Set New Goals (Dream!):

It can be easy to wait for a challenging season to be over. “When I get better, then I will take that trip.” “When I get better, then I will _____.” Why not take that trip now? As I have walked through this long journey of health issues, Laura and I have learned to take those trips now. Even though those trips can be tough on my body, the memories are priceless. So go live out that adventure. Experience love, joy and happiness during even the toughest of times. I encourage you to find what brings you happiness and go experience it. Keep dreaming some big dreams, set some goals, and do what you possibly can to make them happen.

Many facing long term health challenges find that those trials have helped them clarify and simplify their lives.

During my own health journey, I have discovered what’s truly important in life. For me, it’s my faith, my relationship with my bride, relationships with loved ones, encouraging others and truly living out my God-given purpose in life.

What can we learn from this?

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,
who comforts us in all our troubles,
so that we can comfort those in any trouble
with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. ~2 Corinthians 1:3-4

I hope and pray the words above have brought some comfort and encouragement. Go live your life! ~OC

That First Christmas…

Today’s a new day! I love the Christmas season. The songs, the lights and everything bright and merry. As I was listening to the classic “ I’ll Be Home For Christmas”, I started reflecting on that first Christmas so many years ago.

Joseph and Mary were not at home. They were not surrounded by family and friends.

That first Christmas was not beautiful to behold when viewed from a human eyes. There were no fun holiday parties to attend with friends and family. No prizes for the best Ugly Christmas Sweater. There were no merry songs “making spirits bright.”

That first Christmas was a dark, musty barn with little more to offer than a manger with some straw. It was strangers—smelly, dirty strangers—visiting instead of the faces of familiar loved ones. It was feeling far away, lonely, and no doubt afraid and anxious because of the unknown.

That is what “Joy To The World” first looked like.

That first Christmas was about a young couple who followed an unseen God on a journey that was impossible to understand—a journey that led them into a dark, lonely, and humble place so that The Light could break forth in an unexpected and glorious way.

Joseph and Mary would not have chosen to script their story the way it unfolded. If they had, there wouldn’t have been a virgin birth. There wouldn’t have been a stable visited by shepherds. They wouldn’t have chosen to leave their loved ones to travel so far from their comfortable home at such a delicate time. Joseph wouldn’t have chosen to face the utterly disappointing words “There’s no room at the Inn”, for his needy bride. Had they chosen to write their own story, it would have looked better to the human eye.

But . . .because they chose to let God write their story, it was beyond beautiful. Because they accepted God’s story for their lives, their arms were the first to embrace the human form of The One who had held them and carried them to this point. In the midst of obscure details and overwhelming circumstances, Joseph and Mary went. There they were rewarded by the physical presence of the Almighty God. Joseph and Mary went, but Jesus came. 

He came! That is why we can sing “Joy To The World” with such happiness this Christmas season.

The story of Jesus is that He came. He came in the form of a precious baby. Jesus came to change lives. He came to bring great tidings of comfort and joy. Jesus came to bring peace on earth. The world forever changed on that first Christmas night.

Emmanuel, God With Us, still comes. That’s His story. That’s our story.

When we throw ourselves into accepting and loving and living out His Story without reservation, we find out what an overwhelming, beautiful story and gift it really is. Merry Christmas! ~OC

Count It All Joy

Today’s a new day! Do you sometimes have a hard time counting it all joy during the storms of life? I think we all have had those moments. You might be dealing with financial issues, employment issues, housing issues, family issues or health issues. How in the world could you find joy in all the pain and heartbreak?

One of the lessons I have learned during my crazy beautiful health journey, is that God will use these storms to help build our faith. Will we continue to stand firm in our faith when things look hopeless?

I’ve learned that my faith is like a muscle. The more I use it the stronger my faith grows. God continues to amaze me in ways I could never have imagined. God has used my health issues to strengthen my faith and to help others going through their own storms.

There have been some tough days during this journey and more to come, but I continue to see God providing my every need.

I pray as you make it through the storm you’re facing, you will know God on a deeper level and you will have more joy and peace than you know what to do with. ~OC

Take Heart

Today’s a new day! One of my favorite verses is “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33.

What does that verse really mean? One of the biggest lies many Christians are told when they start following God is everything will be perfect and they will never deal with the storms of life. That if God is on our side, nothing can go wrong, and all it takes is a quick prayer to get us out of a sticky situtation. Just like a sitcom on tv. All is good in 30 minutes. But we live in reality and we know that’s far from the truth.

Nowhere in the Bible are we promised a perfect life on earth. Life will be filled with struggles. We will all experience challenges along our journey. Those challenges will look different for each of us. Some will deal with health issues. Sometimes those health challenges will last a lifetime.

The point is that even though we all experience challenges in this journey called life, Jesus has overcome the world. As I mentioned earlier, we will encounter painful moments in this world, but there is a world beyond this world. A place called Heaven, where we will experience peace and wholeness. A place where there is no pain, disease, war, hatred or confusion. Heaven is paradise.

When I experience moments of hopelessness with my own health, I take a moment to think about God’s goodness and promises. I also take time to remember that I need God more today than I did yesterday. I may not understand everything going on in my crazy beautiful health journey, but God does. And for that I am thankful.

I am often asked why would God allow me to walk through so many years of suffering? Of course I do not have all the answers, but I have chosen to trust God in the mist of the storms. To look for every opportunity to help encourage everyone walking through their own challenges. I have decided not to spend all my precious moments researching Google looking for the latest medical or natural cures.

I’ve accepted that I will never fully understand every inner working of my body at any given moment. No one has it all figured out. Not even the medical world. That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t do everything in my power to pray and strive for better health. It just means I will not become consumed by my current health challenges. They are not my true identity.

Nothing gives me more peace and comfort than my relationship with God. Just like any personal relationship takes work and trust the same goes for our relationship with God. It’s a daily commitment. In life we so often stumble for answers. We jump from different diets, different relationships and different careers looking for the answer and looking for a way to make us feel good and worthy. There is nothing wrong with any of those things, but nothing will ever give us as much peace and purpose than a relationship with God and the knowledge that even though the storms of life can be hard, He has already overcome the world.

I know this was a long post, but I pray it brings you hope as you walk through the ups and downs of life. Blessings to all. ~OC

Not the End

Today’s a new day! Sometimes a tragedy can provide a platform for something greater. Something beyond our wildest imagination. Sometimes a tragedy can be the beginning of something beautiful, not the end of the story. ~OC

Peace! Be Still

Today’s a new day! Remember in Mark 4:39, the disciples are frantic because of the raging winds and seas. But what does Jesus do? He arose from a sleep and commonly stated “Peace! Be still.” In that moment, Jesus wasn’t just talking to the storm- He was also speaking to the hearts of those in the boat. Remember that the next time you experience the raging seas in your life. ~OC

Thankfulness While Grieving

Today’s a new day! Today is also Thanksgiving Day. I have many things to be thankful for, but I am also grieving the death of a loved one. This has been a hard week.

It can be difficult to be thankful when you’re in a season of grieving. When you experience the loss of a loved one you begin to wonder if you will ever feel happy again. It is hard to be thankful when you are hurting. The Bible is not silent on the issue of suffering. The Bible is full of scriptures and stories about suffering.

Giving thanks to God during times of grief is difficult, but not impossible. In fact, it is one of the best ways of progressing towards hope while you are grieving. How can you be thankful during times of grief? I believe Remembering , Reflecting , and Rejoicing can guide us through a season of loss and grief.

First, take time to remember. Remember all the truths about God you have been taught and believe. Do not doubt in the darkness what you have clearly seen in the light. One of the results of the grieving process is that our minds become absorbed with that one thing. It is so important that you force yourself to remember key foundational truths about God. Remember that He loves you. Remember that He is in control. Remember that He is always working good; even in the bad circumstances. While grieving, you may not want to hear someone quote Romans 8:28: “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.” But, remember that it is true. 

Second, take time to reflect. Reflect on your current situation, but do not dwell on it. What’s the difference between reflecting and dwelling? Think of it like a house. When you dwell in a house you live in it. Dwelling on the cause of your grief is like going back to the situation and living there as you relive it over and over. When you reflect, you think deeply and carefully about something. Going back to the house illustration, rather than dwelling in the house, you sit outside the house and look in. Reflecting is different because it gives you time to grieve and realize that your life has changed and there will be a new reality moving forward.

Remember, there is no set timeframe for you to stop grieving. Please hear that. Grief has no timeline. In one sense, you will never stop grieving until you are given your new body and dwelling with God in Heaven. The purpose in grieving well is not to stop grieving, but to begin grieving with hope.

When we are grieving we are overwhelmed by our emotions. Our emotions are powerful and have great control over us, so we are told in the Bible to take control of them. We do this by guarding our heart. Proverbs 4:23, “Guard your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.” The heart is the essence of who we are. It is more than just emotions. It is the command center of your life. It directs our emotions.

Through grief and mourning we must remember to guard our hearts.

Third, take time to rejoice. In the middle of your mourning, allow your heart and mind to remember some of the beautiful moments and memories. That can be difficult in the midst of a loss or a difficult season in life. But the fact that God has brought us this new day means that we can rejoice and be glad in it. 

1 Thessalonians 5:18 tells us to give thanks in all circumstances. This verse does not teach us that every circumstance is good, but that God is good. This is not always easy, but we must continue to lean into this truth.

So today take some time to Remember, Reflect, Rejoice

*Remember all the truths about God you have been taught and believe. 

*Reflect and give yourself time to grieve. Guard your heart so that you do not believe lies but trust God.

*Rejoice in the Lord who is powerfully and purposefully at work.

If you are grieving, trust God. Consider the story of Martha from John 11. Martha had just lost her brother and was grieving. When she saw Jesus she said to Him, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died” (John 11:21). Martha then said something very profound. Martha said, “But even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give You” (John 11:22). Martha serves as an example of a godly person hurting yet trusting. So today, allow God to help you give thanks in all circumstances on this Thanksgiving Day. ~OC

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