Today’s a new day! Well, it’s finally here. After months of political ads, speeches, debates and political rallies, it’s finally Election Day. In a few hours, or possibly a few weeks we will have a new president. But sadly, this election and the last few elections have divided America. Everyone has their opinions and sometimes are not open to other points of view.

In our current political climate, it seems almost impossible for anyone to cross party aisles. And if our elected officials cannot bring themselves to be open-minded to opposing views, what hope is there for the rest of us?  Navigating a relationship with a family member or friend who has different political views than you do isn’t easy. But it can be done. It will take some hard work and open minds, but we can walk away from the 2024 election still loving our family and friends. Here are a few steps we can take to make sure our relationships are intact after today’s vote.

Be Curious: Ask questions. Take the time to find out about why someone thinks the way they do and share your experiences. We do not need to be condescending when sharing our political points of view. Do not make people feel stupid if they have questions. Instead, encourage them to continue asking questions. This is how we get to know each other. Our differences should be something we celebrate. Not demonize.

Listen: It’s easy to tell yourself you are open-minded. But when your family member or friend has an entirely different political viewpoint you may find yourself wanting to defend your beliefs instead of listening to theirs. It’s important to resist that impulse. If you’re taking the time to sit down and discuss a certain topic, both of you need to be really present in the conversation. Distractions should be kept to a minimum as you engage in conversation.

So how do you and your loved ones actively listen to each other? One way to do this is by reiterating the point you just heard them make by saying “This is what I heard you say, am I correct?”. This allows your family member/friend to confirm this or correct themselves if it didn’t come across in the way they hoped it would. In return, your family/friend should offer you the same courtesy. The whole point of a discussion is to see how someone arrived at their opinion; Arguing over why their opinion is wrong is not.

Monitor Your Reaction: When you are having a spirited conversation about political differences that you know both you and your family/friend are passionate about, there are ways to ensure that the discussion will not get heated. Before jumping in, take some time to organize your thoughts. By allowing yourself to take a breath you lessen the risk of saying something angry and disrespectful. If there is a point when voices are being raised or volatility is starting to take over, that’s your cue to take a timeout and return to the discussion when you are both level-headed enough to continue. Even a simple “Hey, this is important and I want to talk about it, but I’m feeling pretty upset right now. Maybe we can talk tomorrow?” can make a huge difference. 

R-E-S-P-E-C-T: It’s more than a Aretha Franklin song. There is nothing wrong with questioning your beliefs. Although, to be honest, it can be terrifying when it happens.

We allow ourselves to be open to new ideas when we question what we originally thought we knew. Though, keep in mind, your family/friend should never force their beliefs on you.  A supportive family member or friend would never try to influence your opinions. Instead, they would tell you this is how they see an issue and that how you process that information is up to you.

There you go. Not every relationship can survive political differences. Sadly, that’s just part of life. However, if you find yourself in a conversation with a family member or friend with different political beliefs or opinions than you, open and honest communication is going to be more important than ever. Do not be afraid to talk to each other about your opinions and ask questions if you want to know more. The key is to always be respectful of each other’s thoughts and feelings. After all, love has no political affiliations. ~OC