Tag: Words

Happy 25th!

Today, Laura and I are celebrating our 25th Wedding Anniversary. When you start out on this journey called marriage, your 25th anniversary seems so far away. But, as many people told us as newlyweds, time flies when you are having fun and it sure does.

We met at a singles event along the walking trail in Palm Beach, FL in January 1999. We enjoyed some great conversation and laughs, but we both did not walk away thinking that’s the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with. No, that would come a little later. But not much later. But we took those first few months to pray and get to know each other better.

So in April of 1999, we got engaged. I told you it was not much later. Then on September 3,1999, we both took vows to love, respect and cherish each other for the rest of our days. Oh, we also committed to love each other through sickness and health. Little did we know what was ahead of us in that area of our marriage. I think Laura drew the short stick on that one.

As many of you know, just a few years into our marriage my health started to decline. What we thought would be a short story of overcoming health issues, has turned into a twenty-two year and counting crazy beautiful journey. One that has drastically changed our marriage and our lives. But I believe Laura would agree, it has made our marriage and our lives stronger.

As we have walked this crazy health journey, we have been surrounded by some amazing family and friends. Some of those friends have been part of our love story from the very beginning. I am so thankful for their support during our journey and for having them share in so many special moments with us over the last 25 years.

The past 25 years have been filled with some tough moments. We have dealt with issues most couples will never deal with or at least not until they’re later years. We have been told countless times, that I would not make it for another 24 hours. We have celebrated countless holidays with me in the hospital. But through all of those tough moments, we dealt with them together. And we laughed. One of the promises I made to Laura on the day we got married, was I would make her laugh every day. Even through the storms of life, I am happy to say I have kept that promise. As Laura and I have traveled this journey we realize that marriage is just two imperfect people refusing to give up on each other. We have made our marriage a priority and kept God at the center.

As we celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary today, we count it all joy for the amazing journey God has allowed us to experience together. We know every day and every anniversary is a gift. A gift we never take for granted. So today, we will spend some time reflecting, celebrating and laughing. Always laughing. Together. ~OC

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Partisan Politics

Today’s a new day! There are several things I dislike about the blending of politics and the Christian community. I could write a series of books on that topic. One of those issues is when some in the Christian community refer to an opposing candidate or political party as “The Enemy.” Really? The enemy? Do you realize you probably have more in common with that “enemy” than you have differences. By using such language we’re potentially missing out on a great friendship because of politics. God’s heart must break when he sees this happening among his children.

I truly believe Christians can vote, engage in respectful political conversations, and be passionate about policies and issues. I think lively and respectful discussions make us better people. But, when we engage in political conversations, we should avoid engaging in partisan politics.

What does the dictionary say about the word Partisan? “A feeling, showing, or deriving from strong and sometimes blind adherence to a particular party, faction, cause, or person.”

One of the problems with partisan loyalty, is often those strong opinions about a particular political affiliation becomes core to a person’s identity. For instance, when we fall into the partisan trap, we do not simply agree with Democrats or Republicans on certain issues, “Democrat” or “Republican” becomes fundamental to how we think of ourselves. Similarly, ideological perspectives, such as “Progressive” or “Conservative,” can also become cornerstones of our identity.

Partisan beliefs sometimes become fixated on a political leader. Our loyalty gets directed to the person who leads the party, embodies the party’s values, or seems capable of saving the party from opponents. That strong and sometimes blind adherence can be concentrated on one particular person.

So, what happens when we give our loyalty to a politician, a party, or an ideological group? What are some of the negative effects of partisanship?

Our values become shaped by culture and not by our faith. For Christians, partisanship often begins with genuine Christian motivation. We find that one party seems to align with biblical values on a particular issue or policy. Perhaps it is a concern for the poor or a concern for the unborn. It could be a biblical stance on sexual ethics or justice for people wrongly accused of crime. This desire to support a party that supports biblical values is admirable.

However, political parties are a mixed bag. No political party aligns completely with kingdom interests, values, and priorities. When we develop a strong and sometimes blind adherence to a political party, that party can begin to shape our values.

Sadly, many are towing the party line rather than holding fast to the truth of scripture. They have abandoned the historic Christian view on war, wealth, poverty, ethnicity, sexuality, or something else…and we don’t even know it. They have allowed a party platform, rather than the Holy Spirit, to shape their views.

Because we agree with a party on issue X, we blindly assume that party must also be right on issue Y. This is a dangerous and harmful assumption.

Sadly the world is currently filled with anger and division. That’s because the partisan spirit is a spirit of division. When we have a strong and sometimes blind adherence to a particular side, we tend to assume everyone on the other side is foolish, evil, or both. We do not see political opponents as people to listen to, understand, empathize with, and love. No, we see them as enemies to silence and defeat. As Christians, we go so far as to doubt someone can truly be a Christian if they vote for the other party.

Partisanship often becomes so severe that fear and hatred of the other side becomes a test of camaraderie. The question we implicitly ask friends and family is not just, “Do you share my convictions?” but rather, “Do you share my outrage?” If someone is not as angry and upset as we are, that person becomes suspect in our eyes. Perhaps they aren’t one of us if they do not share our anger and outrage.

That sort of angry, fearful, and outraged partisanship is not only dividing us from our neighbors, but also from our brothers and sisters in Christ. It ought to be obvious how many Christian principles this violates: “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you. (Luke 6:27), “But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.” (Colossians 3:8), or Titus 3:2 which states “to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.”

Our neighbors are not our enemies. The devil is our enemy (Ephesians 6:11-12). Our neighbors are not issues to be solved, opponents to defeat, or enemies to be conquered. They are people to be loved and cared for. Even when we strongly disagree with them, even when they are far from God, they are people to be loved.

Pride and double standards can create even further division. Strategically, it makes sense to exaggerate the faults, shortcomings of the other team, while minimizing our own. We see this all the time in partisan politics. There is moral outrage over something said or done in the party across the aisle but complete silence or excuses when the same thing happens on our side of the aisle.

On both ends of the political spectrum, people demand the impeachment and even imprisonment of politicians for unethical behavior. However, when one of our own is caught doing the same thing, we rally around them in solidarity and support. If someone objects, “Isn’t this just like when so-and-so did this?” we question that person’s loyalty. “Whose side are you on anyway?” we ask defensively.

Criticism of our side is not allowed. We are afraid it will give ammunition to the folks across the aisle. So, regardless of what our political tribe does, we think we must remain loyal.

This sort of behavior bleeds over into other areas of our lives and leads to a twisted form of Christianity. It leads us to ignore the logs in our eyes and search for the specks in the eyes of others. Of course, this is the opposite of what Jesus taught us to do (Matthew 7:1-5).

Partisan politics teaches us to think like the Pharisee in Jesus’ parable, “God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector” (Luke 18:11). What if we replaced “tax collector” with a modern political term? Do we pride ourselves that we are not like those across the aisle?

There can be a time to criticize, but as Christians we should begin with ourselves and not our “opponents.” We should be working on our own faults instead of pointing fingers at others.


As I shared in the beginning, none of this is to say a Christian shouldn’t vote, support a particular candidate, be passionate about certain issues, or even prefer one party over another. However, this is a reminder about loyalty because it’s too easy to fall into partisan politics.

We must all be aware that there is a danger when we give our allegiance to a particular group or person. Our values, priorities, and perspectives will be shaped by that allegiance. We can fool ourselves into believing that we “think for ourselves.” However, like it or not, we are social creatures and we are shaped by our group loyalty.

As Christians, our loyalty and allegiance should belong to God. We must remember that our true family or tribe is much bigger than America, political party, ethnic group, or ideological views. The things of this world will always be competing for our loyalty, but we must resist those temptations.

On several occasions, the apostles rebuked partisanship in the first-century church. The answer to partisanship is Paul’s words to the Galatian churches, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28).

So let’s walk into this political season with our eyes fixed on love, serving others and keeping our eyes on the real prize. A Heavenly reward. ~OC

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Morning Prayer

Dear Lord, we humbly approach you with hearts overflowing with thankfulness and praise. Your boundless love and mercy and your enduring faithfulness fills us with awe. We are grateful for the precious gift of life; for every breath we take and for every heartbeat. Lord, we thank you for all the blessings you have generously given. We are thankful for the people you have brought into our lives. We are deeply grateful for the precious gift of your son, Jesus Christ. We humbly seek your forgiveness for the times we have fallen short and for the moments we overlook the blessings you have granted us. We commit to follow you with all our hearts, souls, minds, and strength.
Lord, we humbly ask for your healing touch in every aspect of our lives – physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Heal all illnesses, Lord, all diseases, and all weaknesses in our bodies. Mend every emotional wound and soothe every heartache, and heal every trauma. Lord, renew our minds and transform them through your word and fill us with your peace. We ask for your protection over our lives, and the lives of our loved ones. Lord, shield us from every deception and every trap set by the enemy toward any spirit that enters our lives with intentions to harm, to steal, and to destroy. Provide us, Lord, with your peace and safeguard us in times of turmoil by your grace and mercy. We pray all this in Jesus Name.

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I Am A…..

Today’s a new day! Over the last few years, when people ask me if I am a Christian I hesitate for just a second. It’s not that I am ashamed of being a follower of Jesus, but so many Christians have given the word “Christian “ a bad name. So I usually answer by sharing my Mission Statement for Life which states, “I am a flawed individual chasing after Jesus.”

“Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.” John‬ ‭1‬:‭12‬ ‭

When I was ten years old, I asked Jesus to come into my life and was baptized. For years I would refer to myself as a Christian when asked. But in the last few years, the word “Christian” has been hijacked by a certain segment of the Christian community that looks nothing like the Jesus I read about in the Bible. So personally, I need to make the distinction between Christian and a person running after Jesus.

Because when people look at my faith, I do not want them seeing a judgmental, close minded Christian that is sadly so prevalent in the Christian community these days. No, I want anyone that God brings my way, to see someone who loves and respects people right where they’re at in life. I want to build relationships that go far beyond any differences we may have. I pray people walk away from their interaction with me feeling loved and encouraged. Also maybe with a better understanding of Jesus, who gave all on the Cross for all of us. ~OC

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Are You a 3am Friend?

Good evening! It’s 10:15pm here in South Florida, as I sit in my recliner and write this post. I have a question to ask? Do you have a 3am friend?

OC, what in the world is a 3am friend? I’m glad you asked. A 3am friend is a friend you can call at 3am when the storms of life hit. Where most people would probably not even answer the phone, a 3am friend welcomes your call.

The 3am friend is one of the most important people in our lives. It doesn’t matter if these are work friends, faith friends, or family relations.

You can call that 3am friend because you’re confident that they care about you even when they are distracted by their own challenges or recovering from a hard day. You can also trust them to respect and support you even when they see you at your worst.

Do you have 3 a.m. friends? More importantly, are you a 3 a.m. friend for others?

I hope your answer to both questions is, “Yes, of course.” But that isn’t true for all of us, nor is it true all the time. There are all kinds of fancy ideas and theories about “community.” I don’t pretend to have a mastery of what all possible communities could or should look like. But at the end of the day, communities do one critically important thing: they create relationships. Supportive and loving relationships.

The simplest way to build community is by letting others know that we want to be their 3 a.m. friend. Maybe you are ready to be that 3 a.m. friend, and they don’t know it.

On a number of occasions, friends have surprised me by calling me in the middle of night with a crisis. Perhaps they needed someone to support family members waiting tensely in an emergency room. Perhaps they were overwhelmed by the pressures of life. Maybe they needed someone to just listen to them. Maybe they needed prayer.

Over the years, I have come to realize that it is an honor to be trusted in moments like that. When someone shares their vulnerability, they are inviting us to know them in a deeper way.

If you’ve never done it, I suggest that, right now, you call or text the people that you know are your 3 a.m. friends. Thank them for filling this role in your life even if you’ve never needed to make that call. If there are people that you know whose middle-of-the-night calls you would welcome, consider letting them know how you feel.

While we can talk about “building community” in fancy ways elsewhere, this may be the most important community you will ever have. God knows you need them and they need you.

So, if you ever need a 3am friend, please reach out to me. I would be honored to do life with you. Even at 3am. Blessings. ~OC

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A Milestone

Good Morning! Today I hit a milestone. Earlier this morning, I wrote my 1,000 post. Well, I guess this is 1,001. I could never have imagined writing a thousand post when I started this blog back on June 28, 2018 with the help of my amazing bride Laura and wonderful sister in love Faith. I could never have imagined that I would write and have a book published based on my blog entries.

Over the past six years, I have always tried to write what I believe God put on my heart. The majority of my blogposts have been written from a hospital room on 4 South at Good Samaritan Medical Center. My post have been about my experiences and my observations of the world as I have run this crazy beautiful health journey. A lot of the post were written long before I even started my blog. That’s why it’s a good idea to journal.

I know over the years, my writings have caused a lot of conversations. Some good. Some not so good. But they have started much needed conversations. That’s what a writer is supposed to do. Stir up conversation.

Over the years, many people have shared my blog gave them the courage to start writing their own story. Some have even published their own books. That means a lot to me.

So I will continue sharing my thoughts. I am not sure how many more post I have in me, but I will keep writing until the day comes to put a period on my journey. Thankfully that’s not today. ~OC

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What Do You See?

Today’s a new day!

What do you see in the world around you? Broken hearts, broken souls, or even lives that seem lost forever?  Some say they will never change or they aren’t worth it.

So here’s my question… If we see these things and don’t reach out with compassion and love to help their situation, are we saying they don’t matter?

Maybe we are saying it’s not my problem, or someone else will handle it. Seeing the world today makes me wonder, are we truly seeing all these things but our hearts are blind to caring for others through compassion, sharing God’s love and reaching out to see what we may do to ease the pain?

Now for those of you thinking, I understand some folks don’t want or can’t expect help.  But what about the ones who want help but don’t reach out because of judgement?  How about sharing with them that God never wants our perfect plans, He wants us the imperfect us. 

He wants my heart open to give someone hope and to show them love and joy through Him.  God’s heart beats for the broken.  If we cling to the Spirit of God, we will begin to see it is not by sight, nor by might, but by the Spirit of God.

Open your heart to those hurting and lost; show them how God loves them today, yesterday and in the days to come. He will stop at nothing to hear our broken cries. 

So I ask you to close your eyes right now, so your heart can see again.

Proverbs 4:23 tells us: Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

I pray your day is filled with amazing moments and God’s blessings. ~OC

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Thoughts on Project 2025

Today’s a new day! I have always felt blessed to have been born and raised in America. Even with all the challenges our nation faces, I am thankful for all the beautiful opportunities. To enjoy the freedoms granted by our constitution’s amendments.

But as I sit and watch all the political ads, rallies and negative rhetoric, I have been struck by the division between our own sense of what it means to be a U.S. citizen and what we’re experiencing in this current election cycle.

By now most of us have heard of Project 2025, a presidential transition project for the next conservative president.

As I have read through Project 2025, I have seen how this project seeks to infuse the federal government with “Christian values,” but the policies it proposes do not reflect the values proclaimed by Jesus Christ.

Side note, before you share any thoughts negative or positive, make sure you have actually read this document.

Project 2025 outlines the efforts of various conservative organizations working together under the leadership of the Heritage Foundation to deconstruct the current administration by assembling a collection of candidates to be considered for hire in the next administration and providing online training for those individuals.

Project 2025 is a 180-day roadmap for the former president to hit the ground running if elected in November. The plan basically outlines four priorities:

*Restore the American family. There definition of the American family.

*Handcuff the bureaucracy. Once again, there definition of bureaucracy.

*Defend the nation by removing the U.S. from international organizations, sealing its borders, and increasing reliance on fossil fuels.

*And Finally, Project 2025 prioritizes the pursuit of happiness, which is startlingly interpreted as follows: “Our Constitution grants each of us the liberty to do not what we want, but what we ought. This pursuit of the good life is found primarily in family – marriage, children, Thanksgiving dinners, and the like.”

Knowing that Project 2025 and its supporters are hoping to “reshape our republic” in this fashion, I cannot sit around and not speak up and help educate. It breaks my heart to think about what our country and our freedoms will look like should this project be implemented. The recent denial from the former president about not knowing anything about Project 2025, does not change my concern over the project and the future of our country. America will never look the same if Project 2025 is implemented.

My concerns are not just about Project 2025, but I am angered by the attempt to co-opt Christianity in support of such radical policies. The kind of Christianity that is being described and embraced in the pages of this project are no where close to the words and actions of Jesus that we read about in the Bible.

I am saddened that so many Christians are less concerned about upholding the dignity of and providing for the needs of those who are most vulnerable in their society – widows, orphans, the imprisoned, the lgbtq+ community, women, those who are dealing with health issues, those who are disabled and those who are poor.

The earliest Christians banded together to share their resources with one another and give to those who were in need. Moreover, Christians throughout history have transcended national allegiances based on their faith, as their faith draws them toward mutual understanding and peaceful relationship with the whole of the human family.

It is true that Christianity has been co-opted throughout the centuries by various political rulers who have used it as a tool to accomplish their purposes (slavery, Jim Crow and dictatorships come to mind). And although some Christian leaders used their religion to achieve political power and prestige, there has always been a strong Christian community that resisted the co-opting of their faith for political purposes, resisted the temptation to join their faith to greed of all kinds, and resisted the joining of their faith with nationalism.

Today, I urge every Christian and all those interested in history not to allow Christianity to be co-opted by a political manifesto that wants to remove our freedom to be ourselves, with all of our differences; that wants to restrict so many freedoms; that wants to allow white supremacy to continue to poison our country’s citizens and communities; that wants to eliminate policies that grant basic dignities to poor people; and that cares only for economic gain to the detriment of our planet and our people.

I am urging everyone to reject Project 2025. I believe our future depends on it and our faith demands it. ~OC

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Be Kind

Today’s a new day! BE KIND, OR BE QUIET.

This is a Kindergarten rule, you guys. It’s the most basic of the basics. Either choose your words with kindness, or keep your mouth shut and just listen.
Fear and anger and hate are already running high, friends. There is no room for more.

And honestly, there should be no room for any of it. Not within the body of Christ. As Christians, our hope does not lie in the law of the land. Our hope lies in Jesus, his crucifixion and his resurrection. This is a hope that is firm and secure, an anchor for our souls. Is not this the hope that we should be sharing with everyone we come in contact with? Regardless of religious, social, economic or political differences.

Instead of arguing with one another, I suggest we focus our efforts on something that actually furthers the Gospel of Christ.

*We love our neighbor by baking cookies, inviting them over for a meal, or stopping to talk with them in the yard, and get to know them better.

*We serve our communities by offering our time and our gifts.

*We listen, we watch, we pray, and then we reach out in kindness and love.

*We immerse ourselves in the Word of God so that we can grow in knowledge and discernment.

*We treat all people with love and respect.

*We remember that life is not all about us.

*And for goodness sakes be kind. Or just keep our sweet mouths shut.

And all God’s people said…Amen. ~OC

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Not in the Bible

Today’s a new day! There is a saying in the Church and the Christian Community that has always bothered me. Maybe it’s rubbed you the wrong way too.

“Love the sinner, hate the sin.”

Not a fan.

As Christians, we can repeat that phrase quicker than we can recite John 3:16, Romans 6:23 or Psalm 137:9. I encourage you to check them out.

Here’s the problem. Jesus never said it. The Apostle Paul never wrote it in any of his letters. Moses never carved it into a tablet. King David never used it in a song.

“Love the sinner, hate the sin” is not a Bible verse. Surprise! Surprise! You can look from Genesis to Revelation, but you will never find it.

To be fair, maybe the phrase draws on some different scriptures. But you will never find the phrase “Love the sinner, hate the sin.”in the Bible.

I guess somewhere in church history, the phrase evolved into being a neatly packaged quip ready for quick and easy use.

It is like opening a packet of instant hot chocolate or preparing a cup of instant coffee; here, though, we have instant judgment.

Yes, of course, I love you, but … And off we go on the long judgment train.

It appears some Christian’s consider the saying more authoritative than what Jesus actually does say in the Bible (things like not judging others. Check out Matthew 7:1-5).

One of the issues with “love the sinner, hate the sin” is that the second part of the saying always gets in the way of the first part.

The second part of this phrase gives people the license to judge others, to hold something against someone else. That doesn’t seem like love to me.

When people use the phrase “love the sinner, hate the sin” it blocks their ability to love people God loves. This phrase brands someone as less than, not good enough or worthy enough for God’s unconditional love.

The phrase “love the sinner, hate the sin” puts condition on our love for others. I will love you, but only so far; there are limits. It makes people unable to see beyond what they consider faults or sins in someone else’s life. It makes people unwilling to see anything more than what they do not like about an individual or groups of people.

In my flawed Christian life, I will never be able to love people as God loves them, or as God loves me.

But something that Jesus really does say is, “Do not judge, and you will not be judged; do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap; for the measure you give will be the measure you get back.” Luke 6:37-38

In the Gospels according to Matthew and Luke, Jesus says we should pay attention to the big oak tree growing in our own eyes and distorting our vision.

We get all worked up about something that looks like a speck in someone else’s eye, but, truthfully, we cannot see much of anything with that big ole red wood tree sticking out all over our face and blocking our view.

If we actually looked at our own lives, we might discover that what we thought was a horrible speck of dirt in another person’s eye in need of removal was really just a harmless eye freckle.

So today, let’s not get so fixated on the things we do not like and make a conscious decision to just love people. Warts and all. ~OC

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