Dear Men of God,

Today’s a new day! My apologies to all the ladies today. The following post is geared towards men and the importance of men having solid friendships with other men.

Today, I write from a position of painful experiences. Today, I believe God is calling me to be transparent as I share the following message.

I have tried for years to be involved in Christian men’s groups. Unfortunately, most have never produced much fruit. Several have caused pain, loss and mistrust. Even with that said, I am still open to being part of a Christian men’s group. But not one that is more concerned about a man’s social status in society than they are about the man’s heart. Not easy to find. I definitely do not want to be part of any men’s group that preaches we need to be a man’s man in the likeness of John Wayne.

In a society that celebrates rugged individualism, Christian men are often left searching for and craving connection, but unsure how to or where to find it. Men, the Bible calls us to community. In Ecclesiastes 4:9, we read that “two are better than one.” Yet so many men are struggling to forge deep, meaningful friendships with other men. I am one of those men.

The consequences are real. Loneliness among men are at their highest rates in decades. Loneliness can lead men to make some poor choices, which can ultimately lead to brokenness.

I believe for men to be better husbands, fathers and friends, we need to be surrounded by not just mere acquaintances, but by brothers who sharpen each other “as iron sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17).

The Bible is full of scriptures that tell us that we are all created for relationships. Even men. In Genesis 2:18 we read, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” While often shared at wedding ceremonies, this verse actually speaks about our need for companionship. Jesus himself modeled friendship, calling his disciples “friends” (John 15:15).

For Christian men, friendships should not be a distraction from our faith but a cornerstone of it. Men, we need to be surrounded by other Christian men offering accountability and encouragement.

Yet men often pursue other gods—careers, social status, or some type of hobby before seeking out true friendships.

True friendship are a beautiful gift and I believe, an important part of living a life that honors God. In Proverbs 18:24, we read those life changing words “a friend who sticks closer than a brother,” a bond that mirrors Christ’s sacrificial love. Such friendships require intentionality and spending quality time together. And not being afraid to leave the shallow end of conversations and dive into deep, sometimes hard conversations. True brotherhood is also about laughing together and enjoying life.

Men of God, the stakes are high. Loneliness and brokenness are stealing our peace, our joy and our witness. But I believe true brotherhood, rooted in God’s love, can restore each of us. ~OC

The Race

Today’s a new day! As I continue to recover from my hospital stay, God is reminding me that He created me to be a marathoner, not a sprinter. But, I want to be a 100% now and not wait through the months of recovery. You would think after twenty-three years on this crazy beautiful health journey I would have that lesson memorized.

Throughout my entire life of playing and watching sports, some of the people I have had the most respect for are those athletes who have overcome tremendous hurdles. They work through an injury or trial in life and reach the highest levels in their respective sports.

I always loved running as a child, but never ran a marathon until after my cancer diagnosis. Even a Parkinson’s diagnosis could not keep me from running. However, as I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, I realize that it’s not a sprint, but a marathon. Along the path of the race, there will be many trials and tribulations that come along our way. In any sport, teams will face tough stretches where their teamwork will be tested, but it’s how they come out of those trials that determine whether or not they will be called “champions.”

As I ran my marathons, I would often experience fatigue. In the heavenly race, we can consider fatigue to be a temptation whether it is not praying every day or letting our Bible collect dust. We all face different types of temptations and at times, we succumb to those temptations. However, Jesus wants us to drink the living water and trust in Him at all times. In John 4:13-14, we read the following words from Jesus to the woman at the well:

“Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (John 4:13-14)

With the exception of a few very talented runners, most people run a marathon to finish the race. As Christians, we are taught to run to the finish line or in other words, until God calls us home to be with Him. After you accept the invitation to run with Jesus, there is still training that we all need in order to fully experience all that God has in store for our lives.

Our spiritual training is something we all need to do 24/7/365 in order to run the race God has specifically designed for each of us. It takes a lot of effort to stay in our lanes and sometimes we run into a few hurdles along the way, but the goal we have to remember is ultimately receiving that heavenly reward when we come face-to-face with with Jesus in heaven.

Today, I encourage you to keep running the race God has planned for your life. While it may seem difficult at times and a shortcut might seem tempting, remember the heavenly reward that God has set before us once we finish the race. His Son ran the most grueling part of the race for us when He suffered and died on the cross for us, so that we can have eternal life and have a heavenly reward. I want to encourage you to keep spending time in God’s word each day. When we are equipped with the Gospel, we can withstand any test the enemy throws at us just like our Savior did in the wilderness (Matthew 4).

I want to encourage everyone to run this amazing race with me. My hope and prayer is that everyone comes into a beautiful and personal relationship with Jesus. So as I close out today’s writing, I want to share a little of the Apostle Paul’s letter to the Philippians that I believe, sums up my post pretty well.

“Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 3:12-14

Today, I encourage each of us to press on towards the ultimate goal. ~OC

Things I Love

Today’s a new day! As I sit in my hospital room receiving treatments and there being more questions than answers, I started reflecting on life and everything going on around the world. And the conclusion I came up with… the world is a mess.

Do not stop reading yet. This is not going to be a post about all the negative things going on around the world. That would be too easy to write about and very depressing. No, today I am going to share about things that I love and that make me happy. So, here we go.

I love hearing my bride Laura’s voice and seeing her face the first thing in the morning. I love making memories with my bride and making her laugh. I love God. I love hanging out with good friends. I love my family and friends. I love puppies. I love watching manatees. I love sports. I love 80’s music. I love a great movie. I love reading a book that I cannot put down. I love seeing old couples still holding hands. I love hearing babies laugh. I love seeing people overcome great obstacles. I love seeing people laugh and be happy.

I love watching planes fly over and wondering where they’re headed. I love laughing for no particular reason. I love encouraging people. I love walking through a bookstore. I love history. I love visiting museums and historical places. I love to daydream. I love lighthouses. I love my quiet time with God. I love hearing the rain at night. I love the quiet of the morning before the rest of the world wakes up.

I love people watching. I love to pray for people. I love the theatre. I love shopping for running shoes. I love a great t-shirt. I love meeting new people. I love reminiscing about days gone by. I love my medical team past and present. I love a large cup of ice tea with extra ice. I love loving people and being loved. I love still being in awe of God’s creation.

I love watching and listening to birds with my bride. I love a road trip. I love thinking about friends from my school days and thankful I am still in touch with many of them. I love thinking about the ones I have lost touch with and hope they’re living amazing lives. I love that laughter is more contagious than the flu. I love hearing about answered prayers. I love watching people succeed in life. I love cruises. I love hanging out with positive people. I love receiving cards in the mail.

I love watching people pull over on the side of the road to take pictures of a beautiful rainbow. I love old churches and buildings. I love small towns. I love beautiful sunrises. I love amazing sunsets. I love taking pictures. I love the Fall and Winter seasons. I love making up songs. I love singing in the car.

I love mornings. I love a great diner. I love city life. I love watching the ocean. I love sitting on a porch in the mountains. I love old houses. I love a cup of hot chocolate made with milk not water. I love to learn new things. I love hearing a great sermon. I love to write. I love great conversations. I love when people are respectful and kind.

I love all of you for caring enough to read this post. What does your love list look like? ~OC

Lessons Along the Journey

Today’s a new day! As I spend the week in the hospital receiving treatments and recovering, I have been reflecting on my long health journey and many hospital stays. The lessons learned over the years are many. Here is one that came to my mind this week. ~OC

As I have run this crazy beautiful health journey, I have learned to set myself free from impossible expectations. To let go of my own agenda and not allow anyone to force their agenda’s on me. I have learned to let God do His thing while I learn to rest in Him. To lean into His promises and asked, “God what do you want me to learn from this health journey and how can you use me as I travel this road?”

The life lessons that God wants to teach us through the storms of life can be life-changing. Learning to release my own agenda was only the first lesson for me. I thought my plan was a good, even a God-honoring plan, but it turns out that God had a different plan. A plan that included chronic health issues. A plan for me to be a missionary at medical appointments and hospital visits. A plan that I never would have chosen for myself. But even in the pain and struggles of this health journey, I have learned a second lesson that I believe we would all be better off by learning.

The lesson is this: God is working everything out for our good in life, even when might not believe it or cannot see it.

Now, let me just say that this lesson is a hard one to believe when your life is filled with medical appointments, hospital stays and a crazy amount of pain. If you’re having a hard time believing it today as you read this, let me encourage you with the following words from God’s own heart:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” ~Romans 8:28

I confess that in some areas it has taken me years to see the good that God can bring out of a situation. Sometimes our heads must choose to trust when our hearts cannot muster up the courage to do so. And that brings me to the next lesson I have learned.

Sometimes, God allows us to experience broken bodies so that we can realize we have an even greater need—a broken heart. A broken heart that needs Him. If we will let Him, God wants to take our broken hearts, and pour His love in. That is part of the “good” that He wants to work for us in the scripture verse above. He wants to heal our brokenness, and in so doing, bring good out of it. And then, as only God can do, He wants to work through us to show a world of hurting and broken hearts that He can do the same for them. That is part of what He means when He says that we have been “called according to His purpose.”

God actually has a purpose for us. No matter how broken our lives feel, God has a purpose for each and every one of us. God can take broken people and use them for His greater purposes. All He needs from us is a willing heart.

Maybe you feel your life is too messed up for God to accept. The truth is, God desperately wants us to turn to Him in the middle of our big old mess and lift our hearts and lives to Him.

As I continue to run this health journey, I have learned that all God needs is a willing heart. Because if you are willing, even though you may feel like you are a mess, God will honor whatever faith you can muster, and take your brokenness and turn it into something truly beautiful.

So today, I pray the following for each of us:

Dear God, I pray that You will take our pain and brokenness and use it for Your good. I pray that You will use our “I can’t “ situations to show us what You can do and want to do in our lives. God, we thank you for hearing our prayers today. It’s in Your powerful and matchless name we pray. Amen.

Taking A Break

Today’s a new day! I love connecting with people on social media and reading about what everyone is up to. I also love sharing my thoughts and journey through social media and my blog. But I believe it’s time for a break from social media and my blog post.

The past several weeks, I have noticed the time I am spending on social media constantly increasing. I began wondering how much life am I missing by being on social media so much. The Pay Attention and Embrace Life portion of my brain sounded something like this:

“This crazy beautiful health journey is making life more difficult in so many areas of my life. I need to spend more time embracing life instead of looking at a screen. I need to make time for more face to face interactions and less online interactions. I need to spend more time reading a great book and experiencing new music. Or maybe spending more time enjoying the music of my youth and remembering the many memories that those songs bring back. As my health continues to decline, do I really want to spend precious time staring at a screen? Or do I want to make more memories with my bride, family and friends? I need to be present for them. I need to let go of social media in all areas  for a little while and give those around me more time and attention. I need to focus on things that truly matter instead of having my eyes and mind focused on some type of screen.”

“Not only that, but I really need a break. I need to recharge. I need some time to focus on things other than what I am going to write about in my blog or post on social media. With my health issues becoming more of a challenge, it’s getting more difficult to write out my thoughts. I need to use my energy and the brain cells I have left on living life and making amazing memories.”

With that in mind, I have decided to take some time away from all social media and my blog. I have no idea how long this break will last. It will last as long as I feel God telling me to stay away. I believe that a break will breathe some new life into my creativity, which is never a bad thing in the realm of writing. I hope you all understand.

So, I want to wish everyone a Happy Birthday and Anniversary that I might miss as I am away. I pray your summer is filled with family, friends, vacations and good memories. Take time for the important things in life.

Feel free to come by and visit if possible or give me a call. Let’s stay in contact the old school way…in person or actually talking on the phone. See you later. God Bless. ~OC

Hope and Joy

Today’s a new day! The following post is one that I have been writing and rewriting for months. I am not sure it’s exactly everything I want to say, but sometimes you just have to put it out there and not worry about the response.

What if I shared with you that when I look at this crazy beautiful health journey I am on, I do so with hope and joy in my heart?

In the midst of countless hospital visits, treatments, pain and surgeries there has been indescribable hope and joy that has surrounded my every step.

Let me share some truth with you. It has not been my health journey that has that brought me this hope and joy. Far from it. The hope and joy that I live with comes from someone else. You see, as I have experienced my health declining over the years, I have become intimately aware of how fragile life really is. I have become more aware of how short, and how painful our time can be on this journey called life. This has led me to crave for a life that God promised to those who would follow Him. A life where there is no more pain, no more suffering, and no more death. 

As I have run this grueling health journey, I found myself more desperate for God’s word and the peace of heaven. There were days I fixed my eyes on heaven just to get through the day. But then something amazing began to happen. The more I focused on God’s promises and heaven, the more I felt alive and renewed. Even though my body continues to decline, I have experienced more hope in the promises found in the Bible than ever before. I started leaning more into those promises because that’s where I find my hope, peace and strength. I have to make a daily choice to totally embrace God’s promises or allow this health journey to consume me. To become my identity.

I began to see the scriptures in a whole new way. Verses like the following:

“My brothers and sisters, you will face all kinds of trouble. When you do, think of it as pure joy. Your faith will be tested. You know that when this happens it will produce in you the strength to continue. And you must allow this strength to finish its work. Then you will be all you should be. You will have everything you need.”~James 1:2-4

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” ~Romans 8:18

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I know as some of you read this post, you’re facing major storms in your life. Life seems overwhelming at times. So, when some guy is telling you to “think of it as pure joy”, it might bring out feelings of anger rather than joy. I get it. But just for a second asked yourself, “What if these verses are true?” What if even during the toughest moments of your journey, the cancer diagnosis, the Parkinson’s diagnosis or some other challenge is actually being used to make you perfect and complete, lacking in nothing? And that even the deepest hurt will someday be replaced with insurmountable love, peace, and joy.

The hope and joy I am writing about may not always look like happiness the way we understand it. The hope and joy that comes from following God and focusing on heaven is not the same as what the world defines as joy. I believe it’s far more rewarding.

The world connects joy to a moment, experience or circumstance. So, if life is currently full of sunshine, we have plenty of reasons to celebrate. But the amazing thing about God’s joy is that nothing in our life could be going right, but with God’s help, we can still find the strength within our soul to praise, to help others, and ultimately, still have hope and joy.

The darkest moments of my health journey are filled with hope and joy because I continue to cling to the beautiful promises of God. They are my lifeline. And as I continue to hold onto that hope, my head miraculously stays above the raging seas. The storms that surround me haven’t changed, but I know even the biggest battles in my life cannot take away my most precious gift in life, my relationship with God. And for that, I am forever grateful.

As I close out this post, I want you to hold onto the following truth: The hope and joy that comes from Heaven, far outweighs the trials we will face here on earth. ~OC

Truly Living

Today’s a new day! Are you just merely existing in this journey called life?

As I look around me, I see so many people who are just walking through the motions of everyday life, but they are not truly living life. They are not embracing it. For whatever ever reason they have stopped living before their hearts stopped beating. 

As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey for the past twenty-three years, I have learned that living a meaningful life has nothing to do with how much money you have in the bank or the materialistic things that you may possess. To truly live has nothing to do with your status in life.

To truly live life is to appreciate everything that you are. To live your life being aware of all your shortcomings but still loving yourself. To understand that those imperfections are part of who you are. To realize that you do not need to change anything about yourself to just impress others. Make changes because they make you a better person. To understand that you are far from perfect but you are unique. There is only one of you walking on this earth. To truly live is to be happy with the person that God uniquely created…You.

To truly live life means to take that trip now, instead of waiting for the right time. The right time is now. A lot can happen in life between now and the right time. Choose to embrace adventure now.

To truly live life means to be in the present, to live in the moment and not waste your time dwelling on the past, or what could have been. To let go of what has happened and focus on what you can do right now to live a better life. To be a better person.

To truly live means to appreciate everything around you. To take time to watch the sunrise or sunset, listen to the birds singing, sit by the ocean or call up some friends to get together to just celebrate living.

To truly live life is to be okay expressing your feelings. To accept that sometimes we need to laugh, cry or scream. To allow yourself to grieve and heal.

To truly live life is to appreciate each moment. To find awesomeness and wander in every day life. To make the choice to get up every day and try to make the best of every day because you don’t know if you’ll be here tomorrow. To try and learn something from each of your life experiences.

To truly live life is to spend time with friends and loved ones. To surround yourself with those that encourage, challenge and inspire you to live your best life.

To truly live life is to find your purpose and live it out. To chase after your hopes and dreams and then go out and accomplish them. To never give up!

To truly live life is to be kind and respectful to others. To buy breakfast for the person in line behind you. To reach out to family and friends to let them know how much they mean to you. To smile at a stranger. To take time to do one selfless act, big or small, on a regular basis. To truly live is to try to make a difference in your part of the world. 

To truly live life is to make the world a better place for the next generation. This one life is a beautiful gift. Embrace it! ~OC

God Knows Our Future

Today’s a new day! We don’t know our future, but God does. He not only knows it, but God has carefully planned and designed it and has full control over it. From this point of view, our future, although different from what we may have imagined, it is in the most secure place: in God’s hands.

Whenever we feel scared and confused, we must remember that we know the One who knows our future and everything about us. God is the One who knows us on the most intimate level and knows our earthly life from our first breath to our very last one. ~OC

A Flicker

Today’s a new day! As this crazy beautiful health journey gets a little tougher each day, I want to take some time to share a few lessons I have learned along the way. The following has been written over a series of weeks and months. I hope it brings a time of reflection as you walk out your own journey.

  • Do not waste your time on things that you don’t enjoy. I have learned it’s hard to succeed in something that you don’t like. Patience, passion, and dedication come more easily when you love what you do.
  • Do not be concerned over other people’s opinions. Being caught up in others opinions can weaken and paralyze you. If you let it, it can grow worse and worse every day until there is nothing left of you, but a empty shell of yourself. Listen to God’s voice and go with it. Some people may call you crazy, but many may be encouraged by your choices.
  • Do not allow any person or situation to control your life. Take full responsibility for your actions. Limit bad habits and try to lead a healthier lifestyle. Find a hobby that makes you happy. Most of all, do not procrastinate. Make the most of each day. Let your life be shaped by the decisions you make not by the ones you didn’t.
  • Do not be so busy, that life slips past you. Appreciate the people around you. May your friends and family always be a source of strength and love. Never take them for granted.

It is difficult for me to fully express my feelings about the importance of these simple realizations, but I hope that you will listen to someone who has experienced how valuable time is.

I am not upset or scared about what lies ahead because this health journey has helped bring meaning and purpose to my life. Each day is a beautiful gift to be celebrated. So every day, I take some time to take it all in. Time is truly a beautiful gift.

As I continue to run this health journey, I have learned that everyone has potential. But potential means nothing without the courage to realize it. To believe that God has given each of us purpose in this life. To turn that purpose into amazing opportunities.

We can move through a life created by circumstances, missed moments and opportunities or we can strive for what we believe in and write the amazing story of our life. I hope you will make the right choice.

I pray you will leave a positive mark on this world. That your life will be filled with hope and meaning. Life is a beautiful playground, where dreams are possible. Yet, we are not here forever. Our life is a short spark in this beautiful world that flies by with incredible speed. So, live your life with meaning and passion. Embrace every moment. Make it spectacular. Make it count! ~OC

Timeless

Today’s a new day! Being a cancer survivor and dealing with multiple health issues forever changes your relationship with time. It seems to pass so quickly, and there’s always a question about how much of it you’re going to get. At times it can be overwhelming. But maybe that’s why I always loved running. A 5K, 13.1 or 26.2 run can feel timeless if you’re embracing every moment of the journey.

Before I had to quit running a number of years ago, running almost made me forget my health issues. As I continue running this crazy beautiful health journey, I realize time marches on whether we are ready or not. I am as ready as I’ll ever be. Let’s go! ~OC

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