Dear…,

Today’s a new day!

Dear……,

I want you to know, first and foremost, how special you are. Those are not words to make you feel better. Whether you realize it or not, your life matters.

I want you to know how you light up the world with your smile when you show it off. So please, show it off more. You use more of your face muscles when you smile, so stretch it out so wide that it hurts and remember when you grow old and see wrinkles around your mouth that you got them from smiling.

I know people are trying to reach out to you to tell you that everything is going to be alright and that they’re there for you. Please – and I cannot stress this enough – do not push them away or shut them out. You may not want to hear it, but those family members, friends, and coworkers are there for you and would do anything to help.

So, give them a chance even when you don’t think they’ll understand your pain. You’ll never know if you do not let them in. You’re feeling alone right now. So alone that you don’t think anyone can see all the pain you’re going through.

I want you to know I see you, okay? I can see the pain written all over your face because I know the look of someone trying so hard to pretend like they’re alright when they’re crumbling on the inside. You’re not alone, you have people in your life, and even people you didn’t see coming, who are more than willing to reach out and be there for you.

I know you feel like you cannot get through this current storm. I know it seems like your world is crumbling all around and you cannot find the strength to get back up. Your days are spent isolated in your house, and you cannot eat, sleep or find the strength to move from the comfort and safety of your bed. You have lost the ambition to go outside and breathe in the fresh air. Can I share a little truth with you? I have been where you’re at. I did a pretty good job hiding it, so most people even those closest to me didn’t even notice it. Some days I was barely holding on.

So, I encourage you to hang in there. You’re important to this world and have so much talent and so many amazing ideas to give. You have a light inside you that lights up the world. So keep holding on.

Please, continue to take one day at a time. Keep leaning into the loving arms and promises of God. It’s so easy to want all the answers right this moment, but this life is not a 30 minute tv show. I would love to give you a quick fix, but that could possibly rob you of some amazing lessons God is trying to teach you in this moment. But I can promise you this. We will get through this together. Keep holding on. ~OC

Here For You

Today’s a new day!

When the nights are long and sleep is a distant memory and your days are full of dark cloudy memories, I will be here for you

When the world feels like it’s moving a million miles an hour and you want to jump off, I will be here for you

When the world seems to have forgotten you and moved on, I will be here for you

When the doctors give you little hope your friends can’t be found, I will be here for you

When you feel alone in this broken and dark world, I will be here for you

When the rest of the world calls you crazy because you go against the grain, I will be here for you

When you decide to question everything you been taught and your friends and church question your faith, I will be here for you

When your lifestyle doesn’t align with those of your family and friends, I will be here for you

When you decide to speak up and be bold, I will be here for you

When the rest of the world misses out on your beauty and promise, I will be here for you

When you need to laugh or cry, I will be here for you

When the world thinks your ideals are but a pipe dream, I will be here for you

When your journey takes you down a winding and uncertain road, I will be here for you

When you need a second or hundredth chance, I will be here for you

You never have to walk this journey alone, I will walk with you anyway you need me to

I never want to miss a chance to show you, I will always be here for you

It’s gonna be okay, I will be here for you

I’ll be here, I’ll be here

Anyway you need

I’ll be here for you

~OC

Game Plan

Today’s a new day! As I continue to run this crazy beautiful health journey, I thought I would share my game plan with you. Hopefully you will find some takeaways to apply to your own journey.

1. Recognizing that so many of our battles are waged in the mind, I chose to focus on God who is all-powerful and compassionate. The Bible tells me that God’s Name is El Elyon, God Most High, and that nothing can come into my life that is not first filtered through the fingers of God’s love. God knew before the foundation of the world that I would be here in this moment dealing with multiple life threatening health issues and he already provided the resources I would need to face it. God’s plan for me in every trial of every size is that I experience peace and victory, never defeat.

2. I chose to view this journey as a gift. Granted, it’s like expecting the newest and hottest new toy for Christmas and getting a pair of socks, but it’s still a gift. This is the time to draw near to God, to experience God more fully, to enjoy the simple joys of life, to focus on those things that are truly important. I will thank God every day for the gift of my health journey.

3. Although my health battle wants to be an all-encompassing issue in my life, I refuse to sink within myself. I will continue to reach out to people each day with a text, word of encouragement, act of service or prayer.

4. I will not ignore my emotions, which can be all over the place. I will allow myself to reflect as necessary in order to express my feelings, but I will not be ruled by them.

5. I will share what is happening to me with others and enlist their support and prayers. I cannot run this journey alone, and I will not rob others of the blessing they can receive by running with me.

6. I will make both short-term and long-term goals in order to have something in the future to look forward to. For example, I plan on continuing to make beautiful memories with my bride. I will continue to share my journey on this blog. I will continue to learn and experience new things in life.

7. I will find a reason to laugh and make my bride laugh every day. Laura and I have used humor (sometimes dark) to get us through the toughest moments of this journey.

8. I will remind myself that, in some inexplicable way, the manner in which I conduct myself during this crazy beautiful health journey, does indeed impact the lives around me. The book of Job tells us that humans sometimes get caught up in the battle between God and the enemy. Jesus Himself told His disciples upon their completion of a missionary journey, that God had seen Satan fall from heaven as a result of their actions.

9. I will endeavor to keep my life as “normal” as possible. I will continue my every-day activities as long as I am physically and mentally able. This will afford me the comfort of the predictable and common aspects of life as well as helping me not to slide into introspection and self-pity.

10. I will continue to praise, serve and thank Jesus for every moment of this journey. It has not been an easy one, but it has been filled with amazing lessons, experiences and memories.

Dear friends, I am praying for you. I am asking that you will be “sincere and blameless” (Philippians 1:10). The word “sincere” is a Greek word that grew out of a poor practice in the marketplace of the day. Everyone in that day used pottery for many tasks like we use plastic today. It was important that the pots be well made. Most were, but there were some unscrupulous pottery makers who would find a pot with cracks in it. Rather than discarding it, they would fill the crack with wax to cover it up. This would work as long as the pot sold early in the day. But after a longer time of sitting out in the hot Middle Eastern sun, the wax would melt and the cracks would show. The Apostle Paul prayed that the Philippians would avoid this by being sincere or “sun-tested.” May you, as you face the heat and pressures of this world, find yourself to be, by His grace, without wax. Blessings. ~OC

Comfort Zone

Today’s a new day! Are you planted in your comfort zone? It’s so easy to live in our comfort zones. So many people say they want God to move in their lives, but when God shakes things up, so many people decide to hide under their covers. Our comfort zones are so comfortable. So predictable. So convenient. But remember, nothing ever grows in the comfort zone. So today, make the choice to step out of your comfort zone. ~OC

I Asked…

Today’s a new day! As I have posted some videos about my current trip to Plains, GA for President Jimmy Carter’s 100th Birthday Celebration, several people have reached out and shared they wished they would have known I was coming because they would have loved to make the trip with me. I was like what?

I just checked my past text and social media post and back at the first of August, I sent out text, messages and social media posts inviting people to join me on this trip. I knew back then before my dementia diagnosis, that traveling by myself was not a good idea. And Laura’s busy work schedule did not allow for her to make the trip with me. I also had numerous conversations with friends on the phone and in person about this trip. Several shared they were interested, but never followed through. Only one friend stepped up and shared he would go. I am thankful he did.

So while I am sorry many are missing out on this amazing trip, it’s not because you were not asked. It’s because you chose not to respond. I am not mad at you, but do not act like you were not invited.~OC

A Big Question

Today’s a new day! What is keeping you from living the complete life? I know that is a big question, with many potential answers. But God designed each of us to live a complete whole life.

Here are a few things, I believe can help us live out the life God created for each of us.

A New Chapter. Too many of us are living in the past. We continue to relive past disappointments. Past failures. Or sometimes we live in past successes. We all know someone, who is eager to tell us about winning the 5th grade all county championship forty years ago. Don’t get me wrong, we should celebrate past successes. We should also learn from past mistakes. But we cannot live in the past. The great thing is, we have the opportunity to start a new chapter each morning. So close the chapter on your past and start writing a new one.

Worthy. Has anyone told you lately you are worthy? That you are important. No matter your past, God finds you worthy. He sent his Son down from heaven to die for us. I think that proves how worthy we are in God’s eyes.

Comfort Zone. I believe to live the whole life that God created for us, we have to step out of our comfort zones. We have to be willing to take some chances in life. God designed us to be creative. To be adventurous. We cannot truly experience life, if we choose to stay in our nice easy comfortable zones.

Labels. Stop wearing the labels the world puts on us. How many people continue to wear the labels put on them as a child? Not smart enough. Too short. Too weird. Too heavy. Too tall. Your from the wrong side of the tracks. So many people continue to wear these labels into adulthood. Today, I encourage you to take those labels off. Trash them. You are more than a label. You were created by a loving God to live an incredible life. To Dream. To Succeed. To Thrive.

Courage. It will take courage to start feeling Worthy. It will take courage to step out of your Comfort Zone. It will take courage to take off the Labels you have been wearing for years. But I promise you it will be worth it.

Today, I encourage each of us to think about these five points. To start living the incredible life, God has created us to live. Will you make a commitment to living wholeheartedly? ~OC

A Beautiful Gift

Today’s a new day! It’s only been a week since I was given the diagnosis of dementia. But the symptoms have been showing for a number of years. Since my diagnosis life has been filled with many phone calls and text from concerned family and friends. I appreciate them all. In the past week, here are some things I have thought about as I begin my journey with dementia.

My dementia diagnosis does not define me. Although the diagnosis is life changing, I will not allow it to change who I am. I will fight that battle for as long as I can. I will continue to love people the way I always have. Probably a little more. I totally understand dementia is a progressive disease and I may not be able to do all the things I once did, but I want to continue doing the things I enjoy for as long as I can.

If you want to know how I am doing, just ask me. The sudden change in how others communicate with me since my diagnosis has been a little frustrating. Trying to avoid conversations about my diagnosis of dementia will only make me feel uncomfortable and isolated. I am still me. For now.

Yes, the diagnosis is correct. I wish it wasn’t, but it is. Younger people can be diagnosed with dementia. While the vast majority of people are affected by dementia at an older age, the disease can affect younger individuals. If you have concerns about your own cognition, I encourage you to get checked out regardless of your age.

Please don’t debate my diagnosis or tell me I don’t look like I have dementia. Do not attempt to dismiss the diagnosis. Those responses can be offensive. It is hard enough to tell someone I have dementia , let alone having to defend it. You may not see my dementia, but I live with it every day.

Please understand that sometimes my words and actions will not be the true me. It’s the dementia. As the disease progresses, I might deal with anxiety, confusion and a host of other issues. There are days I may want to sleep more. Remember, I am still me, just a little different.

My dementia diagnosis does not mean my life is over. I plan on continuing to live an active and memory filled life as long as possible. Laura and I plan on continuing to embrace life to its fullest.

So please keep reaching out and treating me the same old way. Social interactions are very important to my wellbeing. So do not be afraid to call, come by the condo or plan a time to meet. My life continues to be a beautiful gift. ~OC

When Life Knocks You Down

Today’s a new day! This has been a tough week for me mentally, physically emotionally and spiritually. I heard words from doctors this week that have not been promising. This week has made me press into my faith even more.

It’s easy to have faith when life is treating you well. When everything is working out. It’s much harder to have faith when you are facing challenges in your life. But that is exactly when you need to apply your faith. When you need to lean into your faith even deeper. Because faith is believing beyond the grime diagnosis from the doctors.

Faith is taking the first step.
Faith is jumping in the deep end and trusting everything will be okay.
It was easier to be positive back in the day, when I could lace up my running shoes and go for a 50 mile run. It’s much harder, much much harder when I have days where it’s hard to just walk across the living room without feeling like I have just run a marathon. Life was much easier when I could easily remember why I walked into another room. When my brain did not feel like I was in a constant fog. Living out our faith is so much easier when life is not so demanding. But that’s actually when we need faith the most.

We need faith and usually find faith when life is hard. On days, when we are fighting to just survive. Those are the days when we need faith the most. Because everything that means anything is worth the fight. Everything worth living for will require a real fight to achieve it. You and I cannot decide to quit half way through the race. We must run every step. Even when that next step is the hardest.

This crazy beautiful health journey has knocked me down a few times along the way. But I keep getting up. This week hit me like a severe cramp during a marathon. This week’s life changing diagnosis rocked my world. I was knocked down. I had to dig deep to get back up. But I did get back up. I didn’t stay down. My friend you need to keep getting back up when life knocks you down.

Here are 3 things I want to share about getting back up when life knocks you down.

1). Remember:
God still loves us and there are still many things to be thankful for.

We need to remember that God has given us many promises to hang onto. Check out Romans 8:28, Jeremiah 29:11, and Isaiah 40:31.

2). Connect:
The greatest temptation when we are feeling “down and out” is to isolate ourselves. We may feel embarrassed or lost about our current situation, or wonder if others will understand. We may think we can’t express how we are feeling. But the tough moments in life should connect us with God, our family and friends.

3). Pray:
We can pray that God will give us the opportunity to share what we are learning with someone else. As we begin to focus on others, we lose the grip of self-focus and all the negative feelings that can go along with it. Little by little, we will be planting seeds of a powerful life story we can tell some time in the future.

Here is a prayer that I hope helps as you walk through the tough days and keep getting back up:

Dear God, remind us that trials are to be expected. Help us keep our reactions under control and within Your will. Give us great strength to endure this trial in a way that is refining and transforming -for Your glory. ~OC

Broken Pieces

Today’s a new day! As I study the Bible, I see that those who did God’s work were often those who made the biggest mistakes and had to learn the hard way. Just like some of us. They were no saints. As we walk this journey called life, there are wounded and broken people all around us. They might be family, friends, neighbors or coworkers. They might be the people we sit next to at church. We may not actually see their wounds, but we can usually tell when people are sad or struggling or just not themselves. Most of us have been there at some point in our own lives. We have dealt with health, relationship or finances issues. That brokenness is very personal, so much so that we often do not want to share the details with anyone. That brokenness is unique to each of us. It’s ours, nobody else’s.

Yet in a strange way, it connects us with each other as something that we have in common.

We all have our stories, battles and wounds from this world. Broken things are often despised and thrown out. Something we no longer need. We just toss them away. We tend to reject damaged goods. That includes relationships. Often when relationships breakdown, the tendency is to walk away and find someone new.

But throughout history, we see where God chooses to use broken people.

The world is full of people with broken hearts, broken spirits and broken relationships. Maybe this is hitting close to home. But there is no reason to close yourself off from the world because you might get hurt. Again. I want to remind you of the words in Psalm 34:18, “The Lord is near to the broken hearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

That verse is so true. God’s love can shine through the cracks and through our broken lives. Life at its best is letting the light and the love of God shine through, especially at our broken places. Only God’s love shining through will bring proper healing and transformation. When life is going well and there’s lots of sunny days, it’s so much easier to see God at work in our lives.

But in those dark days, we see God’s presence and strength shared with us in a different way. He is stronger than our darkest moments and if we trust in Him, we will grow in grace and confidence and others will notice that light shining through our cracks. But in those moments, we might need to be open and vulnerable to others.

We all know how difficult, but rewarding building relationships can be. It can be challenging to be real and transparent. We do not want people to know everything about us, but there are some painful issues that we can share, especially if we know that God is helping us through those difficult times.

Today, do you feel there are too many broken parts of your life to be of any use to God?

Believe me you are not alone. Jesus wants us to bring him all our brokenness and ask him to fill us with his light, that will shine through our cracks. So today, I pray you will lay all your broken pieces at the feet of Jesus. ~~OC

Life…Is So Short

Today’s a new day! Life.. is so short. It will continue to go on. We cannot hold on and think that every day is promised. We have all experienced great losses in this journey called life. We have all felt that pain of losing a loved one, someone that we cared deeply about.

But yet we’re still here and now we must continue on. But what is the example that we’re going to leave? What kind of legacy do we want to leave behind? How do we lead the next generation? Hate is not going to make it work. Being afraid to be truthful to who you are will only limit who you truly are inside.

Don’t let anyone take that away from you. Don’t let anyone take away who you were created to be. Don’t be afraid, to be honest. Don’t be afraid to be different. Even being different can be difficult for a lot of people.

But I guarantee you this, there’s nobody in the world that can do you. When the time comes what would you leave behind? What legacy will be left behind to remind others of your greatness, of your losses, of your victories, of your sorrows? This is a short life that we all have. And it’s not easy, it’s not easy living it every day.

It’s not easy to go through so many different trials, so many different challenges. Maybe that challenge will be a lost relationship, job or financial struggle. It’s not easy walking through tough times in this life. We cannot blame life because it’s not the life that makes these challenges what they are today. It is the purpose and purpose never lies it will always tell you the truth.

But while we exist in this world right now I need you to hold on, I need you to hold on strong and don’t give up, I need you to believe in every possibility that you have and understand that it is not over for you. I need you to understand life is always going to be filled with good moments.

But keep in mind sooner or later, we will breathe our last breath. So keep pushing forward and don’t give up and don’t give in and do the best that you can to have the right attitude. To make your life matter. Your life is not an accident. Your life has so much meaning. Are you ready to take on the unknown? Are you prepared for it? You can’t even understand in most cases how beautiful it is sometimes to not even know what’s coming your way, but knowing that God is planning every step. Sometimes it’s not necessary for us to know everything, sometimes it’s not necessary to understand everything. But are you ready to embrace those moments of uncertainty?

There are a lot of negative things and people that exist in this world. People that can always find the negative in any situation. But we must make peace within our own heart. We must make peace in our community. Life.. is so short. ~OC

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