Flashing Neon Sign

Today’s a new day! As with many neurological illnesses there is nothing noticeable about my condition. It’s not like a broken leg or arm where there is a cast which is obvious when seeing the person. But I cannot tell you how many times I have heard the same old words since my diagnosis last fall, Todd, you do not look like you have dementia.

I often wonder if it comes down to the fact that people feel uncomfortable talking to me about it, so they say the first thing that comes to mind. Which at times can come across as very insensitive and judgmental. Since my diagnosis of early onset dementia caused by my Parkinson’s, I have had several people tell me I do not look or act like someone with dementia. Or Todd, maybe you’re just dealing with an infection of some kind and just need to take some antibiotics. I would be overjoyed if that was actually the case. But I have some amazing doctors and they didn’t come up with this diagnosis lightly.

What does dementia look like? There is no cast or bandage to put on it. I guess I could wear a flashing neon sign that says, “HELLO, I HAVE EARLY ONSET DEMENTIA!” that lets people know of my latest diagnosis.

But seriously, I am walking through a very new and strange season of life, but I know I am not the only one. It simply gets frustrating when people decide to find a different diagnosis or make you doubt your current state of health because they do not like the diagnosis. It can be irritating and cruel when people doubt you and your medical team. Believe me, no one wants to sit in a doctor’s office and hear the words “You have early onset dementia.”

I do think that part of this attitude is because people have a hard time believing someone in their 50’s could have an “old person’s” disease. Also the topic of dementia is not an easy or fun subject to talk about. It can be easier to just ignore it or try to explain it away.

I also believe people have their own preconceived beliefs about dementia and I and many others suffering from this horrible disease do not fit in their picture of dementia.

So please do me a favor. Stop putting your personal beliefs or opinions on those suffering from a visually invisible disease or one that you don’t like. Life with dementia is already hard enough. Thanks for listening. ~OC

Take Heart

Today’s a new day! One of my favorite verses is “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33.

What does that verse really mean? One of the biggest lies many Christians are told when they start following God is everything will be perfect and they will never deal with the storms of life. That if God is on our side, nothing can go wrong, and all it takes is a quick prayer to get us out of a sticky situtation. Just like a sitcom on tv. All is good in 30 minutes. But we live in reality and we know that’s far from the truth.

Nowhere in the Bible are we promised a perfect life on earth. Life will be filled with struggles. We will all experience challenges along our journey. Those challenges will look different for each of us. Some will deal with health issues. Sometimes those health challenges will last a lifetime.

The point is that even though we all experience challenges in this journey called life, Jesus has overcome the world. As I mentioned earlier, we will encounter painful moments in this world, but there is a world beyond this world. A place called Heaven, where we will experience peace and wholeness. A place where there is no pain, disease, war, hatred or confusion. Heaven is paradise.

When I experience moments of hopelessness with my own health, I take a moment to think about God’s goodness and promises. I also take time to remember that I need God more today than I did yesterday. I may not understand everything going on in my crazy beautiful health journey, but God does. And for that I am thankful.

I am often asked why would God allow me to walk through so many years of suffering? Of course I do not have all the answers, but I have chosen to trust God in the mist of the storms. To look for every opportunity to help encourage everyone walking through their own challenges. I have decided not to spend all my precious moments researching Google looking for the latest medical or natural cures.

I’ve accepted that I will never fully understand every inner working of my body at any given moment. No one has it all figured out. Not even the medical world. That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t do everything in my power to pray and strive for better health. It just means I will not become consumed by my current health challenges. They are not my true identity.

Nothing gives me more peace and comfort than my relationship with God. Just like any personal relationship takes work and trust the same goes for our relationship with God. It’s a daily commitment. In life we so often stumble for answers. We jump from different diets, different relationships and different careers looking for the answer and looking for a way to make us feel good and worthy. There is nothing wrong with any of those things, but nothing will ever give us as much peace and purpose than a relationship with God and the knowledge that even though the storms of life can be hard, He has already overcome the world.

I know this was a long post, but I pray it brings you hope as you walk through the ups and downs of life. Blessings to all. ~OC

Experiencing Peace

Today’s a new day! Along this journey called life, we all deal with fear. Fear can hit us during what we thought would be a routine doctors appointment. Fear can hit us when test result comes back with more questions than answers. Fear can hit us when we watch the news or scroll through social media. We have all experienced fear in our lives.

Back in 2003, one of my doctors called me early one morning and shared he needed to see me right away. Then he made the comment “Oh and make sure you bring your wife.” A little fear hit me at that moment. Later when the doctor shared I had a tumor, the fear grew a little deeper. Fear, worry and anxiety. My wife and I experienced all those feelings sitting in that doctor’s office.

A few weeks later a biopsy revealed the tumor was the size of golfball and was cancerous. Once again, fear, worry and anxiety smacked me in the face. Things seemed overwhelming at that point.

Then something amazing happened. As I laid in ICU hooked up to several machines, God took away the fear, worry and anxiety. Those feelings were replaced by peace, calmness and even joy. Yes, joy. What changed?

God reminded me of the week long fast I had done a year earlier during a missions trip. He revealed the reason I had fasted was to prepare me for this very moment. Peace flooded my room and heart at that moment. In that moment, I completely turned my health situation over to Jesus and trusted Him to walk me through my unknown future.

Even though I had been filled with fear, anxiety and worry, Jesus was right there with me. He shared hope, love and peace even as I was overwhelmed with so many different emotions. God never abandoned me in my time of need.

During that moment, I still had to deal with life as a cancer patient. But that unknown did not overwhelm me anymore. Jesus reminded me that He was bigger than any health issue I would ever face. I am thankful, I did not know my future would be full of more health issues, test, multiple doctors appointments and hospital stays. No, at that moment I was just filled with peace. A peace that has never left me.

Here I am in 2024, after overcoming so much, but still dealing with so many health issues. Fear and worry try to overwhelm me at times, but I am still experiencing that same peace and joy I experienced in that ICU room so many years ago. Knowing that Jesus is still bigger than anything life throws at me. Still living life with a thankful heart. ~OC

Thank You!

Today’s a new day! Most of you know about my crazy beautiful health journey. For almost 18 years, I spent the majority of my life at Good Samaritan Medical Center on 4 South. Those years were not easy, but I was blessed with an amazing medical team. The Doctors, Nurses, CNA’s, Maintenance, Housekeeping, Admissions, Food Service, Tech’s, Transport and Administration became family. We spent many holidays and Super Bowls together. Each of these wonderful. amazing heroes made the tough days easier for Laura West Shoemaker and I.

As we watch this new Covid wave come through, I am concerned for my friends in the healthcare profession. I pray for them and check on them often. I encourage everyone to keep our healthcare workers in your prayers. Their job was difficult before Covid, but this horrible virus has put more of a strain on each of them. If you or a family member find yourselves in the hospital, please show these beautiful heroes respect. These amazing people are there to help you and your loved one. They are actually putting their lives and the lives of their own families on the line to help you get back to your loved ones. So today, say a prayer for all the amazing healthcare workers and hospital/nursing home staff. If you know a healthcare worker take the time to thank them for their service. ~OC

Encouragement

For the past 17.5 years, I have spent countless hours at doctors appointments, treatment centers & the hospital. During those times, I have had the privilege to talk with hurting people experiencing life changing moments. I have had the honor to pray for people who wouldn’t see another year. I have rejoiced with those who experienced a miracle in their medical journey. I have never taken one of those moments for granted. None of those precious moments have been about me. God placed me in those moments to hopefully encourage someone. The truth is, most of the time I have been the one walking away feeling encouraged. Never miss the opportunity to encourage someone. It could be life changing. ~OC

Living In Peace

Along this journey called life, we all deal with fear. Fear can hit us during what we thought would be a routine doctors appointment. Fear can hit us when test result comes back with more questions than answers. Fear can hit us when we watch the news or scroll through social media. We have all experienced fear in our lives.

Back in 2003, one of my doctors called me early one morning and shared he needed to see me right away. Oh, make sure you bring your wife. A little fear hit me at that moment. Later when the doctor shared I had a tumor, the fear grew a little deeper. Fear, Worry and Anxiety. My wife and I experienced all those feelings sitting in that doctors office.

A few weeks later a biopsy revealed the tumor was the size of golfball. A few weeks after that, surgery revealed the tumor was cancerous. Once again, Fear, Worry and Anxiety smacked me in the face. Things seemed overwhelming at that point.

Then something amazing happened. As I laid in ICU hooked up to several machines, God took away the fear, worry and anxiety. Those feelings were replaced by peace, calmness and even joy. Yes, joy. What changed?

God reminded me of the week long fast I had done a year earlier during a missions trip. He shared the reason I had fasted was to prepare me for this very moment. Peace flooded my room and heart at that moment. At that moment, I completely turned my heart toward Jesus and trusted Him to walk me through this journey.

Even though I had been filled with fear, anxiety and worry, Jesus was right there with me. He welcomed me into His presence, even as I was filled with fear. He never abandoned me in my time of need.

During that moment, I still had to deal with life as a cancer patient. But that unknown did not overwhelm me anymore. Jesus reminded me that He was bigger than any health issue I would ever face. I am thankful, I did not know my future would be full of more health issues, test, multiple doctors appointments and hospital stays. No, at that moment I was just filled with peace.

Here I am in 2019, still fighting multiple health issues. Still fighting for my life every day. Still living in the unknown regarding my health. But I am still experiencing that same peace and joy, I experienced in that ICU room so many years ago. Knowing that Jesus is still bigger than anything life throws at me. Still living life with a thankful heart. ~OC

 

 

 

 

 

Hanging Out With Superheroes

I have been blessed to hang out with Superheros for almost 18 years. I am not talking about Batman, Superman, The Black Panther or Wonder Woman. No, my Superheroes do not wear capes or have really cool toys. Well some of them might disagree with that statement. My Superheroes are some of the strongest and giving people I know. Let me share some of their stories.

Good Sam/Florida Cancer Specialist Heroes: These group of heroes from Good Samaritan Medical Center have helped keep me alive for the past 17 years. They are Nurses (Shoutout to 4 South), CNA’s, Housekeepers, Maintenance Workers, Patient Transport, Dietitians, Techs (from various departments), Therapist (from various departments), Food Services (they still check to see if I want anything), Admitting and the parade of Doctors. They each work long hours with little fanfare. If they were to read this post, they would be embarrassed. Because they didn’t choose to be super heroes for the applause. They definitely would not call themselves Superheroes. But I do. These unassuming heroes show up for work each day and save lives. Thank you.

My Medical Team: This list could go on for days. One person I have to mention by name is Dr. James Harris. He is definitely a Superhero. Dr. Harris was my oncologist for almost 17 years before retiring earlier this year. He was the type of doctor who gave you his personal cell phone number and told you to call him if you needed. Over the years, Dr. Harris received many phone calls from my wife Laura. He always answered. Dr. Harris truly cared for each of his patients. I saw him walking the halls of 4 South on many early mornings. When you mention the name Dr. Harris be prepared to hear some amazing stories. Thank you.

Fellow Overcomers: I have been blessed to sit next to or walk the halls with many patients over the years. I have been inspired by their strength and love for life. They have taught me how to navigate through my own crazy beautiful health journey. We have laughed. We have cried. We have shared stories. We have remembered those that fought a tough battle. We have become family. Thank you.

The OC Drivers/Visitors: These are the family and friends who have taken time out of their schedules over the years, to give me rides to treatment/appointments and have sat with me many times. The pressure they have taken off of my bride is amazing. It has been wonderful to hear their stories over the years. Thank you.

My Rockstar: My number one Super Hero is my wife Laura. She has been by my side from day one of this crazy beautiful health journey. Over the past 17.5 years, Laura has worn many hats. She has had to make a lot of tough decisions. She has been and will continue to be my Rockstar. Thank you. Love you.

Those are the Superheroes in my life. They are greater than any Super Hero Hollywood could ever create. I pray you have these type of Superheroes in your life. ~OC

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