Tag: Mental Health

Men and Mental Health

Today, I am writing about a tough subject but one I believe is very important. As many of you know, my current health issues make it very difficult to share or write down my thoughts. I have actually been working on this piece for several months. I know it’s rather long, but I hope you will take the time to read it. Also, even though my health issues are of a physical nature, this health journey has been filled with moments of sadness and feeling a bit lost.

Today’s a new day! June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. I speak with so many men who feel the need to take care of everyone else, but tend to ignore the issues going on in their own lives. So men, today I want to share a little about taking care of yourself.

We have all heard the age-old saying, “Real men don’t cry.” As I have walked this crazy beautiful health journey, I have tried very hard to take a stand against this toxic perspective because real men indeed cry, laugh, hurt, and heal. It’s about time that we stop being afraid to talk about men’s mental health, the different struggles we deal with and start speaking some truth. It’s time to get real.

So, why is it that men’s mental health is still stuck back in the 1950’s in so many ways?

In a world that often misunderstands and judges men for showing some emotions and having real conversations, it can be frightening to bare our souls, not for sympathy or attention, but for connection and understanding. I am often asked why I have chosen to be so open and transparent about my health battle? Well, simply– it is therapeutic for me, and I hope it offers a beacon of hope and understanding to someone out there, walking through their own struggles.

From a young age, the world dictates a playbook on “How to Be a Man,’ essentially promoting a culture where men feel the need to wear a mask, suppressing their true feelings and emotions.

But I believe it’s time to ditch that old playbook and rewrite a new one. A playbook that is open to real conversations. A playbook that encourages men to reach out to other men and discuss the tough issues that we have been taught to suppress. It’s time for real talk. It’s alright to feel, to break down, and to reach out.

I believe many men are concerned about being judged for sharing their feelings and being real. Sharing my experiences and being vulnerable hasn’t always been a walk in the park. In fact, at times it’s like walking a tightrope balancing between being open and the fear of being misunderstood or judged.

But, we must get past the fear of being judged so we can experience true healing. As I have shared my own story, not only have I experienced healing but have seen the power of healing touch other lives around me.

Yes, men’s mental health is indeed a real thing and let us not turn a deaf ear to this issue, but lend a listening one, a shoulder to lean on, and an encouraging word to someone walking through a tough season.

So, how do we rewrite the playbook on men’s mental health? It starts with you and me. It begins with acknowledging that mental health is not a sign of weakness, it is not a cry for attention, but a genuine call for help.

If you or someone you know is dealing with some mental health issues, I encourage you to reach out to a mental health professional. Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your strength and courage to fight back.

The road to unmasking and understanding men’s mental health is a journey filled with speed bumps, turns, and rocky roads. But I encourage you to embrace the journey with all its imperfections and challenges.

In conclusion, remember that it’s alright to stumble, to fall, but most importantly, to rise again, with a life filled with hope, passion, purpose and laughter. Never forget you matter, you belong and you’re loved. ~OC

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Thoughts and Prayers Are Not Enough

Here I am again, writing about another school shooting in America. This is getting old and more frustrating. When will America wake up and realize that common sense gun laws and more mental health resources are needed to help curb this type of violence?

I also offer the following challenge to those politicians and decision makers who will share their “thoughts and prayers” with the families. Please don’t, if there is no action behind those sentiments. Instead, express the actual thoughts you are thinking and the actual prayers you are praying. I mean that quite literally. They are far more meaningful than an empty worthless phrase that is really designed to ease our own discomfort and let us off the hook from having to do anything.

And then match your actions with your prayers and your thoughts. That’s how it works.

If you need an example of how this works, here’s my own personal example. After one of the school shootings earlier this year I lamented to God, saying something “How long oh Lord? How long? I’m so tired of the empty rhetorical cycle that happens after a shooting. A shooting happens, then “thoughts and prayers” which no one actually seems to do, then a pointless debate in which people talk over each other, and then nothing changes. Enough! This cannot keep going on. Amen.”

Please understand, I believe in the power of prayer. But if there is no action behind those prayers, what is the point.

I know even with common sense gun laws and more mental health resources there is a chance that school shootings could still happen, but I truly believe we would see less of these tragic events.

In the end, I just want “thoughts and prayers” to actually mean something and lead to real change. ~OC

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Let’s Talk

Today’s a new day! This morning I want to discuss a tough issue for many in the Christian community. Mental Health. Unfortunately, many believers have made it difficult for those dealing with mental health issues to share and get the help they need.

Mental health issues can still be a highly stigmatized topic in the church. Although many Believers know the trials of occasional anxiety or having the blues, people with a diagnosed mental illness face unique challenges. Some are confronted by Christians who espouse false doctrine that health issues are a sign of unresolved sin or lack of faith. This is a Big Lie!

I want to encourage anyone dealing with mental health issues or any health issue to get the necessary medical care they need. There is nothing wrong with taking medications, having a therapist and loving Jesus all at the same time. There should be no shame or condemnation.

The same biblical truths that have encouraged Christians for centuries can encourage those who suffer with mental health today. I pray those walking through the trials of mental health will cling to these words of encouragement.

1. You Are Not Alone

God’s people have suffered—mentally, emotionally, and physically—since the fall in the garden. Even Jesus cried out in despair on the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46), When we suffer, we are never alone. Never be afraid to reach out for help. Speaking openly about your mental health issues allows those around you to share their own struggles. This allows us all to come together and care for one another.

2). Stop Blaming Yourself. Stop listening to those who may try to put a spiritual guilt trip on you. Mental health issues are not a punishment for sin or lack of faith. As you walk through this journey, I encourage you to keep your eyes on God. He has some amazing plans for your life. Keep leaning into His beautiful promises.

3). Remember, God sees you, loves you and is always with you. Thankfully, we have a wonderful Savior who experiences emotions. As you walk through the effects of mental illness, remember the nearness of Christ. He weeps with you. God knows how He is going to work in and through each of our lives and is with us in the midst of all of our trials. By the amazing grace of God, he sent the Holy Spirit, our comforter and counselor, to be with us , to help us through every moment of life. The Holy Spirit intercedes for us (Romans 8:27). He is there for us when we do not have the words.

4). God’s Word Speaks to us (Romans 15:4).

The word of God isn’t afraid to talk about mental and emotional issues.

Keep the truth of God’s words close. Share them with a close friend, family member, or accountability partner who can remind you when you forget or when you do not have the energy or willpower to remind yourself.

The truth is some will deal with mental health issues for a lifetime. But remember, we can all rejoice in the greatness and sovereignty of our loving Savior. I pray that God will make known his love and strength in all of our struggles. ~OC

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Let Go To Grow

Several people have inquired about Todd taking an indefinite break from social media and sharing his daily thoughts. He wanted to share a few thoughts about his decision to take some time away from the world of social media.

Today’s a new day! When I hear God speak to my heart, I have learned that it serves me well to listen.

So a few weeks ago, I heard God share that it was time to take a break from social media. Then I started questioning the role of social media in my life, comparing and contrasting the pros and cons of it. I have taken breaks before so I thought about those times, too. Then it pretty much dawned on me as the following words were impressed upon me in a real way:

I was not created to spend so much time on social media. These platforms should not take away from time reading, journaling, praying and most importantly spending quality face to face time with real people.

There are some beautiful benefits about social media. They allow us to interact with old friends and meet some amazing people from all over the world. To stay in touch with loved ones. To read and hear about their life experiences. To pray for people. All amazing things. The problem is that social media always demanded more than I truly wanted to give.

The different social media platforms offer us endless opportunities to share our everyday lives, to pose questions, share world events, our opinions and photos of our favorite foods. There is always something to post or respond to. For me, it never stopped. If I missed a day of posting, I would have multiple people reaching out to me asking why I did not post. Not necessarily a bad thing, but a lot of pressure.

The good and bad thing with social media for me personally, is that I really tried to use my accounts to encourage and love on people. I could probably sit around all day long and just be corresponding with people. People feel comfortable sharing their life journey with me. So many people feel like they’re stuck or they’re hopeless. So they would reach out to me. I found myself pouring so much of myself out into so many people. Not complaining because it’s always my honor to connect with people willing to share their amazing life experiences with me. But a few weeks ago, I realized if I truly wanted to help and serve people, I needed to make sure that I was taking care of myself. Which was not always the case.

So, I have officially been off social media and not sharing daily thoughts for about a week. I have used that time to focus more on the truly important things in my life. I have enjoyed a quieter and less hectic week. Being off social media has given me the beautiful gift of rest and peace.

Will I return to social media at some point? I am not really sure. As I have taken a break from social media, God has given me this simple phrase “Let Go to Grow.” ~OC

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Mental Health

Today’s a new day! This morning I want to discuss a tough issue for many in the Christian community. Mental Health. Unfortunately, many believers have made it difficult for those dealing with mental health issues to share and get the help they need.

Mental health issues can still be a highly stigmatized topic in the church. Although many Believers know the trial of occasional anxiety or having the blues, people with a diagnosed mental illness face unique challenges. Some our confronted by Christians who espouse false doctrine that health issues are a sign of unresolved sin or lack of faith. This is a big Lie!

I want to encourage anyone dealing with mental health issues or any health issue to get the necessary medical care you need. There is nothing wrong with taking medications, having a therapist and loving Jesus all at the same time. There should be no shame or condemnation.

The same biblical truths that have encouraged Christians for centuries can encourage those who suffer with mental health today. I pray those walking through the trials of mental health will cling on to these words of encouragement.

  1. You Are Not Alone
    God’s people have suffered—mentally, emotionally, and physically—since the fall in the garden. Even Jesus cried out in despair on the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matt. 27:46), When we suffer, we are never alone. Never be afraid to reach out for help. Speaking openly about your mental health issues allows those around you to share their own struggles. This allows us to come together and care for one another.

2). Stop Blaming Yourself. Also stop listening to those who may try to put a spiritual guilt trip on you. Mental health issues are not a punishment for sin or lack of faith. As you walk through this journey, I encourage you to keep your eyes on God. He has some amazing plans for your life. Keep leaning into that beautiful promise.

3). Remember, God sees you, loves you and is always with you. Thankfully we have a wonderful Savior who experiences emotions. As you walk through effects of mental illness, remember the nearness of Christ. He weeps with you. God knows how He is going to work in and through each of our lives and is with us in the midst of it. By the amazing grace of God, he sent the Holy Spirit, our comforter and counselor, to be with you, to help you. The Holy Spirit intercedes for us (Romans 8:27). He is there for us when we do not have the words.

4). God’s Word Speaks to us.
The word of God isn’t afraid to talk about mental and emotional issues.
Keep the truth of God’s words close. Share them with a close friend, family member, or accountability partner who can remind you when you forget or when you don’t have the energy or willpower to remind yourself.

The truth is some will deal with mental health issues for a lifetime. But remember, we can all rejoice in the greatness and sovereignty of our loving Savior. I pray that God will make known his strength in our struggles. ~OC

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Take Action

Today’s a new day! This morning I woke up to news of another mass shooting in America. More innocent bloodshed. Of course, our elected officials shared their thoughts and prayers for the victims. But that’s not enough anymore. Where is the action behind those thoughts and prayers? If we truly want to see real change, we must look at reforming our current gun laws and putting more money towards mental health care. We must take action.

My faith has always taught me that we are the hands and feet of Jesus. In James 2:26 scripture shares “Faith without works is dead.” I am not dismissing the power of prayer. We must always pray. But I just know that there are times when we are waiting on God to act, and God is actually waiting on us to take action. When we get frustrated and cry out to God “Why don’t you do something?”, if we stop and listen closely, we might hear God softly whispering to us, “I did do something. I created you.”

But that doesn’t take anything away from the power of prayer. You know what I did this morning when I heard the news of another mass shooting in America? I prayed for the victims and community. I prayed for smarter gun laws. I prayed our elected leaders would do more than just offer their thoughts and prayers. It’s past time to take real action. ~OC

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Be Kind

Today’s a new day! Check on your family, friends, neighbors and coworkers. A smile or positive social media post doesn’t mean everything is okay. ~OC

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Wake Up America

I wrote the following back in 2017. Sadly, nothing has changed in America. Four mass shootings in America this week.

Let me say, I believe in the 2nd Amendment. I have never owned a gun and probably never will. With that said, enough is enough. We have a major gun issue in America. Let’s stop ignoring that reality. How many more innocent lives will be taken by people who should have never been able to to purchase a firearm? It is way too easy to buy a gun in America. When will the politicians have the guts to stand up to the NRA? Sadly those politicians will probably continue to take millions and millions of dollars from the NRA. I have family and friends who are responsible gun owners. My question to you and other responsible gun owners in America, when will you stand up and demand common sense gun control?

Also when will we wake up and realize we have a mental health crisis in America? We need more programs for those dealing with mental health issues. Those programs need to be properly funded. We cannot keep cutting funding from these programs. People are hurting and need help.

As I shared above, I wrote this in 2017. Sadly, I am currently watching the images of two mass shootings in less than 24 hours. Dear Politicians, your thoughts and prayers are no longer enough. They feel cheap and disingenuous. America needs you to take real and significant action. Wake Up America! ~OC

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