Tag: Social Media

Dear Men of God,

Today’s a new day! My apologies to all the ladies today. The following post is geared towards men and the importance of men having solid friendships with other men.

Today, I write from a position of painful experiences. Today, I believe God is calling me to be transparent as I share the following message.

I have tried for years to be involved in Christian men’s groups. Unfortunately, most have never produced much fruit. Several have caused pain, loss and mistrust. Even with that said, I am still open to being part of a Christian men’s group. But not one that is more concerned about a man’s social status in society than they are about the man’s heart. Not easy to find. I definitely do not want to be part of any men’s group that preaches we need to be a man’s man in the likeness of John Wayne.

In a society that celebrates rugged individualism, Christian men are often left searching for and craving connection, but unsure how to or where to find it. Men, the Bible calls us to community. In Ecclesiastes 4:9, we read that “two are better than one.” Yet so many men are struggling to forge deep, meaningful friendships with other men. I am one of those men.

The consequences are real. Loneliness among men are at their highest rates in decades. Loneliness can lead men to make some poor choices, which can ultimately lead to brokenness.

I believe for men to be better husbands, fathers and friends, we need to be surrounded by not just mere acquaintances, but by brothers who sharpen each other “as iron sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17).

The Bible is full of scriptures that tell us that we are all created for relationships. Even men. In Genesis 2:18 we read, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” While often shared at wedding ceremonies, this verse actually speaks about our need for companionship. Jesus himself modeled friendship, calling his disciples “friends” (John 15:15).

For Christian men, friendships should not be a distraction from our faith but a cornerstone of it. Men, we need to be surrounded by other Christian men offering accountability and encouragement.

Yet men often pursue other gods—careers, social status, or some type of hobby before seeking out true friendships.

True friendship are a beautiful gift and I believe, an important part of living a life that honors God. In Proverbs 18:24, we read those life changing words “a friend who sticks closer than a brother,” a bond that mirrors Christ’s sacrificial love. Such friendships require intentionality and spending quality time together. And not being afraid to leave the shallow end of conversations and dive into deep, sometimes hard conversations. True brotherhood is also about laughing together and enjoying life.

Men of God, the stakes are high. Loneliness and brokenness are stealing our peace, our joy and our witness. But I believe true brotherhood, rooted in God’s love, can restore each of us. ~OC

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Created for Community

Today’s a new day! God created us for community. Being part of a community allows us to love and support others walking through this journey called life. Being part of a community allows us to celebrate moments of triumphs and hold friends a little closer when heartaches hits those in our community. Being part of a community makes life a bit easier. But we cannot be part of a community if we do not seek one out.

Spoiler Alert! We cannot do life alone. Being surrounded by a supportive community is healthy in so many different ways. I have a small, but solid group of friends I can confide in when I struggle. A group of friends I can celebrate with during the good times. A group of friends that check in with me on a regular basis. There is great comfort being surrounded by community. Seek one out. ~OC

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Taking A Break

Today’s a new day! I love connecting with people on social media and reading about what everyone is up to. I also love sharing my thoughts and journey through social media and my blog. But I believe it’s time for a break from social media and my blog post.

The past several weeks, I have noticed the time I am spending on social media constantly increasing. I began wondering how much life am I missing by being on social media so much. The Pay Attention and Embrace Life portion of my brain sounded something like this:

“This crazy beautiful health journey is making life more difficult in so many areas of my life. I need to spend more time embracing life instead of looking at a screen. I need to make time for more face to face interactions and less online interactions. I need to spend more time reading a great book and experiencing new music. Or maybe spending more time enjoying the music of my youth and remembering the many memories that those songs bring back. As my health continues to decline, do I really want to spend precious time staring at a screen? Or do I want to make more memories with my bride, family and friends? I need to be present for them. I need to let go of social media in all areas  for a little while and give those around me more time and attention. I need to focus on things that truly matter instead of having my eyes and mind focused on some type of screen.”

“Not only that, but I really need a break. I need to recharge. I need some time to focus on things other than what I am going to write about in my blog or post on social media. With my health issues becoming more of a challenge, it’s getting more difficult to write out my thoughts. I need to use my energy and the brain cells I have left on living life and making amazing memories.”

With that in mind, I have decided to take some time away from all social media and my blog. I have no idea how long this break will last. It will last as long as I feel God telling me to stay away. I believe that a break will breathe some new life into my creativity, which is never a bad thing in the realm of writing. I hope you all understand.

So, I want to wish everyone a Happy Birthday and Anniversary that I might miss as I am away. I pray your summer is filled with family, friends, vacations and good memories. Take time for the important things in life.

Feel free to come by and visit if possible or give me a call. Let’s stay in contact the old school way…in person or actually talking on the phone. See you later. God Bless. ~OC

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A History Lesson

As we celebrate the 4th of July I have seen several post about immigration. I even posted one myself. And of course, several people had to comment about how those coming to America for a better opportunity better do it legally or go back to their home country. That got me to thinking. How many of our ancestors came to America legally over the years? So I did a little research.

When talking about immigration policy many people argue that immigrants coming to the United States should all have to enter the United States legally in order to obtain legal immigration status in the United States.Their argument goes something like this:  We cannot make any changes or exceptions in our immigration laws to allow for any type of “amnesty” because it would be unfair to our ancestors and all those who have immigrated legally to the United States over the years. My response to this argument is that you have to examine what the law actually was when you or your ancestors immigrated to the United States. Unless you are a Native American, everyone currently in the United States is either an immigrant or a descendant of a person who immigrated to the United States. 

When our ancestors came to the United States from countries around the world, they did not enter the United States “legally” or with any sort of visa. That’s because immigration laws were virtually non-existent in 1775, as America was still a colony of the United Kingdom. When most of our ancestors arrived at the different ports, they were likely not asked many questions or subjected to “extreme vetting.” They likely did not have visas or any permission to enter the colony. Under the Naturalization Act of 1790, as long as a person was a “free white person” of “good moral character” (who decided that one?) and they could prove that they had resided in the country for two years and had lived in the same residence for a year, they would be allowed to apply to become citizens. This is how most of our ancestors became citizens. Of course many people were brought to America against their will and in shackles. But today, those white ancestors would be considered “illegal aliens” upon arriving in the United States, and after being illegally in the United States for more than one year, would have to leave the country and come back legally through proper processing, with a waiver of the ten year bar. And only if they had a qualifying relative that petitioned for them.

The immigration laws in the United States have become much more restrictive and complicated, especially since 1996 with the passage of the Illegal Immigration Reform and Immigrant Responsibility Act. Plus the different restrictions that have been enacted since the Reform Act of 1996. So when people argue that their ancestors came to America legally, so current immigrants should as well, I challenge them to examine their family history to determine how their ancestors first came to America. Let us not forget our history. America was built on the backs of immigrants. Most of them here against their will. It’s not politicians who make America great, it’s the immigrants who have traveled far and wide and have endured dangerous situations that make America great. If it were not for so called “amnesty” our ancestors and the rest of our family descendants would not have been “legal” or allowed to become American citizens.

That’s your history for today. I encourage each of you to study history before making blanket statements. ~OC

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A Call

Today’s a new day! As I watch tv or scroll through social media, I see so such suffering and injustice. And sadly, I see so many Christians adding to that suffering and injustice. It breaks my heart. More importantly, it breaks God’s heart. During those moments I reflect on the following verse:

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.” ~Proverbs 31:8-9

As I reflect on those verses, I am thankful that God is different and He desires for those who call Him Father to be radically different.

God loves with a love far greater than any of us could truly ever imagine. He feels our pain and disappointments more deeply than we ever could. God will never force Himself on those who choose to live their lives without Him, even though He longs for those who are hurt and broken to take His hand. But He respects our choices.

But for those who choose to call on His name and call themselves Christians, God expects us to be a reflection of His character. To truly live out the words from Proverbs 31:8-9.

As I reflect on those words, am I truly living out those commands?

In a time where political power seems more important than the Gospel to so many American Christians, is the Christian community any different than the world so many of them like to judge?

As Christian, are we fighting against injustice? Are we speaking up for those with no voice? Are we taking the time to help the helpless? Are we truly seeking justice for those in need or just praying about it? Are we even attempting to be the hands and feet of Jesus?

As I pray and look around, I wonder why so many Christians appear to be just paying lip-service while ignoring the plight of those suffering in America and around the world. Why so many spend more time justifying ungodly prejudices against “others” than helping them. Why are so many American Christians so focused on what makes them comfortable and happy that they turn a blind eye to the suffering of those outside of their safe little bubble? Why are so many Christians walking through life ignoring the scriptures that command us to fight for justice and to love all of our neighbors?

Jesus shared the following warning in Matthew 7:21. “Not everyone who calls out to me, ‘Lord! Lord!’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter.”

I hope and pray that you do not see this as an attack on American Christianity, but instead a wake up call for Christians in America to step up and actually live out their faith and the scriptures that call us to be loving and radically different.

As I close, I want to pose the following question to my Christian brothers and sisters: Are you breaking God’s heart by calling yourself His child, but refusing to live a life of serving those in need and fighting for justice?

I know I for one, can and must do better. ~OC

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Hope and Joy

Today’s a new day! The following post is one that I have been writing and rewriting for months. I am not sure it’s exactly everything I want to say, but sometimes you just have to put it out there and not worry about the response.

What if I shared with you that when I look at this crazy beautiful health journey I am on, I do so with hope and joy in my heart?

In the midst of countless hospital visits, treatments, pain and surgeries there has been indescribable hope and joy that has surrounded my every step.

Let me share some truth with you. It has not been my health journey that has that brought me this hope and joy. Far from it. The hope and joy that I live with comes from someone else. You see, as I have experienced my health declining over the years, I have become intimately aware of how fragile life really is. I have become more aware of how short, and how painful our time can be on this journey called life. This has led me to crave for a life that God promised to those who would follow Him. A life where there is no more pain, no more suffering, and no more death. 

As I have run this grueling health journey, I found myself more desperate for God’s word and the peace of heaven. There were days I fixed my eyes on heaven just to get through the day. But then something amazing began to happen. The more I focused on God’s promises and heaven, the more I felt alive and renewed. Even though my body continues to decline, I have experienced more hope in the promises found in the Bible than ever before. I started leaning more into those promises because that’s where I find my hope, peace and strength. I have to make a daily choice to totally embrace God’s promises or allow this health journey to consume me. To become my identity.

I began to see the scriptures in a whole new way. Verses like the following:

“My brothers and sisters, you will face all kinds of trouble. When you do, think of it as pure joy. Your faith will be tested. You know that when this happens it will produce in you the strength to continue. And you must allow this strength to finish its work. Then you will be all you should be. You will have everything you need.”~James 1:2-4

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” ~Romans 8:18

“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I know as some of you read this post, you’re facing major storms in your life. Life seems overwhelming at times. So, when some guy is telling you to “think of it as pure joy”, it might bring out feelings of anger rather than joy. I get it. But just for a second asked yourself, “What if these verses are true?” What if even during the toughest moments of your journey, the cancer diagnosis, the Parkinson’s diagnosis or some other challenge is actually being used to make you perfect and complete, lacking in nothing? And that even the deepest hurt will someday be replaced with insurmountable love, peace, and joy.

The hope and joy I am writing about may not always look like happiness the way we understand it. The hope and joy that comes from following God and focusing on heaven is not the same as what the world defines as joy. I believe it’s far more rewarding.

The world connects joy to a moment, experience or circumstance. So, if life is currently full of sunshine, we have plenty of reasons to celebrate. But the amazing thing about God’s joy is that nothing in our life could be going right, but with God’s help, we can still find the strength within our soul to praise, to help others, and ultimately, still have hope and joy.

The darkest moments of my health journey are filled with hope and joy because I continue to cling to the beautiful promises of God. They are my lifeline. And as I continue to hold onto that hope, my head miraculously stays above the raging seas. The storms that surround me haven’t changed, but I know even the biggest battles in my life cannot take away my most precious gift in life, my relationship with God. And for that, I am forever grateful.

As I close out this post, I want you to hold onto the following truth: The hope and joy that comes from Heaven, far outweighs the trials we will face here on earth. ~OC

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Jesus Never Said…

Today’s a new day? As I study the Bible here are a few things that stand out to me. ~OC

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors who agree with you.

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors that make you feel comfortable.

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors that worship like you.

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors that speak like you.

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors who look like you.

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors who are citizens of your country.

Jesus never said, Love only your neighbors who vote like you.

Here is what Jesus actually did say:

“‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” ~Matthew 23:37-40

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Upcoming Interview

Here is some information about an upcoming interview. I pray you have a wonderful day.

What’s even better than a TED Talk? A Todd Talk!!* 🎉

Join authors—and long-term chronic illness warriors— Andrea Herzer (https://www.andreaherzer.com/) and Todd Shoemaker (https://www.theblessedovercomer.org/)for honest, hope-filled conversations about living with difficult diagnoses, discovering purpose in pain, and finding ministry amid your medical challenges. You’ll even receive tried-and-true tips for both caregivers and care-receivers.

In our three part series, you’ll find encouragement, companionship, and likely a few “Me too!” moments. As C.S. Lewis once said, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’”

✨ Our three-part series kicks off June 26 in Andrea’s private Facebook group, Embracing Abundant Life Together. (https://www.facebook.com/groups/lifeforillness)Join now so you don’t miss out on the fun and fellowship!

*Not affiliated with TED, but definitely Todd-approved.

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Juneteenth

Today’s a new day! Today is also Juneteenth. I want to share a few thoughts about this day and its significance in American history.

My journey to remembering and celebrating Juneteenth occurred later in life due to a lack of knowledge, as I was educated at a time where most school systems did not adequately teach on African American history and culture. (That’s why we can never return to those days). I believe the history of African Americans and their contributions to American society have often been overlooked or marginalized in traditional education systems. Learning about Juneteenth and understanding its significance can be a powerful awakening to the complexities of American history and the ongoing struggle for racial equality.

‍As I have learned more about Juneteenth, it serves as a reminder of both the injustices of the past and the resilience and perseverance of African Americans in the face of adversity. Juneteenth is not just a celebration of freedom from slavery but also a call to action for social justice and equality for all people. By remembering and celebrating Juneteenth, people of all races can honor the struggles and achievements of African Americans and work together towards a more just society. The journey of learning and growth is valuable not only for personal understanding but also for fostering greater empathy and solidarity across all communities.

‍It is never too late to learn and embrace aspects of history that may have been previously overlooked or omitted. Today, my call to action for you, for me, for communities across America is to be open to truly learning our history. All of our history. This will hopefully allow us to contribute to the broader effort of recognizing and honoring the diverse experiences and contributions of all individuals and communities.

Happy Juneteenth! ~OC

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