Today’s a new day! As I have walked through this crazy beautiful health journey, I have always tried to help educate people about what life is like for people dealing with long term chronic illness. Here is a tip for every well meaning person who uses the following statement, “But you don’t look sick”
“You went out for lunch yesterday, you can’t be in that much pain”
“I saw some photos of you on Facebook, looked like you were having a good time. You can’t be that sick”
“I see you went to an event , had friends over or went on vacation. You must be feeling better.” No, it means I am trying to live my life and not be defined by my illness.
So many health issues are called invisible illnesses for a reason.
Whether it’s a mental or physical illness, if it’s not that obvious on the outside then there are always people who will try to diminish what you’re going through.
Because it’s not like you can laugh at a joke when you have a broken bone or anything and it’s not like you can tell people that a bruise doesn’t hurt when it actually does.
It’s called putting on a brave face, not just because you want people to think you’re okay but because sometimes it’s hard to talk about. Sometimes people just don’t understand and because flippant and hurtful comments sometimes make you feel like you have to conceal even the worst of days.
I’ve been around groups of people, trying to laugh and joke and act normal while going through severe pain from the multiple life threatening issues that are slowly killing my body on a daily basis. (not even gonna sugar-coat it) and enduring the lovely overwhelming fatigue that comes with it.
I do not wear my illnesses on my face everyday of my life because they don’t define me as a person and I shouldn’t have to justify being sick to anyone.
More importantly, if having a chronic illness means I am not allowed to smile, laugh or have fun once in a while then what is the point of struggling through the tough days? What is the point of living if I cannot enjoy my life despite being sick.
Just because I “do not look sick” doesn’t automatically mean I am okay.
So please for the love of all that’s good in the world, stop telling people with visible or invisible illnesses that “you don’t look that sick”. Thank you for taking the time to read this public service announcement. ~OC
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