Live On Mission

Today’s a new day! Several weeks ago, someone online asked me with everything going on with my health, what keeps me motivated to keep writing and trying to be a positive influence?

Living out this crazy beautiful health journey is not easy. The journey has been full of twist and turns. Whether it’s multiple doctor appointments, test after test and too many hospital visits to count. As I have run this race, God has allowed me to share this health journey with multiple people and groups. Whether that’s through having one on one conversations, people reading our books, watching the documentary He used to share our story, this blog or by my postings on social media. I take the things God has called me to do seriously because it is my act of worship and service to Him. Since I started dealing with these health issues so many years ago, God has allowed me to share this journey with so many people. It has been a true pleasure, but also a major responsibility. A responsibility to not make this story about me. Most days, I am dealing with a lot of pain and discomfort as I write and share what’s on my heart. Also these days because of the diagnosis of Early Onset Dementia, finding the time and the words is becoming much harder. Plus, based on my health declining, I find myself sleeping much more these days. So creating new content is much harder than I expected it to be. Plus it takes a lot out of energy and vulnerability to share about everything that life brings me each day. It’s not always pretty. I spend a lot of time praying about what I should share and post. I create and write to encourage others and point people to God. That is one of my great desires.

What keeps me motivated is not about gaining followers or affirmation because those things will fade away and are not reliable motivations. The answer to the question posed to me several weeks ago can be found in John 3:30, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” Because when I try to run this health journey or write on my own, I end up in a crazy mess of pride, but when I live and write for Him, life is much fuller and sweeter.

As I continue to run this health journey, I want to spend my time and energy making much of Jesus and living in the fullness of His presence. I do this by using the gifts and passions He has given me to create writings that will hopefully encourage others and help them as they walk through their own life journey and to begin seeking a stronger relationship with God. I believe this quote by Francis Chan sums it up pretty well, “Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter.” I want the things that God allows me to share to outlive me. I want my life to make an eternal difference.

When I look at the life of Jesus, I see a life on mission. He came and lived out a purpose driven life. Nothing distracted Him from His mission, and through the cross, He invites us to live on mission right where we are. Though most of my days are spent living with various health concerns, I want to meet with Him through it all. I do not want to waste the precious moments I have been given dreaming and wishing my journey looked different – I want to do all that I can with what God has given me. I want to use the time, energy, talents, and dreams God has placed in my heart to bring Him glory.

When I get to the end of each day, I want to be able to say “Lord, I did all I could to be your hands and feet. I want my legs to be tired, my body to be spent, and my mind to be at peace knowing that I am living for Him and not the temporary. Even if it means I have to get a little uncomfortable, or show some vulnerability, I want my words to be His tools with a purpose. More Jesus, less me, is my motivation to write, create and share my crazy beautiful health journey with others. I want to live on mission. ~OC