Today’s a new day! I don’t like being in pain and I don’t like having multiple health issues that will probably shorten my life. I would love to grow old with my bride. But I realize that may not be the plans God has for my life. But I know and I trust that He is faithful. God’s plans are the best and do not revolve around me. Acts 13:36 says, “when David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep”. When God has done what he wants through me, I will step into heaven in his perfect timing.
Why has God allowed me to walk this health journey? Maybe it is to help me be a better husband and friend. Maybe it’s an opportunity to share the love of Jesus with more people. Maybe it’s for reasons way beyond my understanding. All I know is that God has given me this gift of health issues to use for his glory. All I know is that I will continue to trust and serve him.
Sometimes it is still hard to comprehend that my life could end at any moment. But isn’t that the case for all of us? As the Bible teaches,
All men are like grass,
and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;
the grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of the Lord stands forever. (1 Peter 1:24)
When I received my first diagnosis in August 2002, it was a total shock. I knew I didn’t feel great, but I had no idea how I was so sick. My life at that time involved being a husband, a social worker and volunteer at multiple ministries.
Back then, some doctors shared I might only have five years to live. However, God had other ideas and even though my health journey has been full of twist and turns and multiple life threatening illnesses, I am still standing. Some days my life has felt like a ticking time bomb. My bride has become an expert in dealing with multiple infections,various types of devices being surgically implanted into my body and various treatments to just keep me alive.
As the multiple health issues continue to weaken my body, I am thankfully aware that Jesus is my Lord and Savior in whom I can depend, and that all other ground is sinking sand. I am so grateful to God for everything. I am thankful for who God is, his majesty, his splendour, and his promises. I am thankful for my bride, family, friends and life. I am so thankful to God for the resurrection of Jesus which means I will have victory over death and do not need to fear what my future holds. It is such a comfort to read,
“Death has been swallowed up in victory”
“Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?”
The sting of death is sin and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God. He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. (1 Corinthians 15:54-56)
As my body grows weaker, I am thankful God continues to allow me to truly embrace life. To continue making beautiful memories with my bride. Some dear friends even bought me an electric trike to get around town. Watch out world! I will enjoy the new bike in between my many naps. After years of not being able to sleep, most of my days now involve sleeping most of the day.
What can be hard is coping with chronic pain and deteriorating health while still navigating the physical and emotional challenges of trying to live a “normal life.” Another challenge is not knowing what each day might bring. It is impossible to make plans. Between multiple medical appointments and hospitalizations, it can be difficult to make any plans.
However, I am just so thankful for God’s guidance through his word. The Bible is so clear about what God wants me to do now, even as I grow weaker: “Be joyful always; pray continuously; give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thess 5:16). God is so clear. This is what God wants me to do now. I am thankful he continues to allow me to live an amazing life.
So, I will continue to thank God for this gift of health issues because he is good and he is using it for his purposes. The plans of the Lord are perfect, even if I do not always know the reasons I continue to walk through this crazy beautiful health journey. All I know is that someday, I will be in the loving presence of Jesus. But until then, I will continue to live life and embrace every moment. If you see me out and about on my trike, stop and say hello. Oh, and wake me up if I happen to be asleep. ~OC
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